Go where the road untangles and unfurls
by those cliff side views over those blue curls
lit only by those high beams off those white pearls.

Only sense of direction is the road ahead
no going back just only forwards instead
as going prevents drifting to the sea bed.

The white sea foam crashes amongst the shore
those high beams persist only for Salvadore
the light bends around the corner then no more.

Driving 90 miles down the highway at 3am on a Tuesday
Night
Hair flying in the backseat radio blasting at 30
the future is bleak
And the past is dreary
18 years old almost on the edge of 19
Emotions seem unbearable and other times weak
Nothing is ever alright I just sit in my room
and imagine myself grown over night
I cant pretend the future isn’t scary id be lying if I said that
I act a 1000 years my age no one understands that
I don’t know my purpose The search might take my lifetime
What happens when the lights go out ?  Am I in heaven ? Am I alright ?
To say I have worries is way over my head, anxiety creeps in while I’m laying in bed
Is it wrong to think I’m meant for more than this life ?
Think positive think positive I’m trying cant you see !
The more I think positive the more unfortunate I believe

New Job.
New Drive.
New Interest.

It's all so new,
yet so-so familiar.

All there is, the heat -
encased in a fireplace
or a furnace.

Smoldering,
the ashes
never filter through
these windless lungs,
instead of oxygen
the flame kindles
on anxiety.

Life is going splendidly - no hiccups -
Breathing is easy
but all that rushes in
is the flagrant blossom
of ragged thoughts,
all the possibilities
for how helpless
the wind is
when it's always being
knocked out.

Cold white numerals
from the Teutonic-honest dash:
9.5°C

Not so cold, I guess
but not the weather to press the button
for the windows to drop

I do while accelerating
too fast for the road,
the fresh air has volume
that angry-loves my tired,
house-cat skin

The wub-wub-wub pulse in my ears
has a cause I control
for once
as the next curve beckons

A train sits idle
Driver turns off the headlights
Helps my night vision

Flying past cop car,
Headlights turn on in rear-view,
Turn off, I can breathe

Oncoming driver,
Flash my lights to warn them
Of deer or police

At small town train tracks
Car flashes brights at random,
Left me quite confused

I’m rolling
My life is like film
It keeps flashing
My eyes before me
See what’s headed after me
I’ve gotten here through love
I’ve been held back here by jealousy
I’m rolling on the ground
My life is like film
My raw image is hated
I’ve been double exposed
The light just isn’t getting it right
Dash cam is sending out live
I’m a flip show for everyone alive
My steering column is looking fuzzy
10 feet ahead of me I can live through memories
Swerve the wheel
I’m rolling
My life is like film
Shut in a dark room
Then seeing the light of day
Through a screen-shot
•
Breathe, Stop steering
Cruise, control your feelings
You don’t need to cry for me