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We had wanted to leave our homes before six in the morning
but left late and lazy at ten or ten-thirty with hurried smirks
and heads turned to the road, West
driving out against the noonward horizon
and visions before us of the great up-and-over

and tired we were already of stiff-armed driving neurotics in Montreal
and monstrous foreheaded yellow bus drivers
ugly children with long middle fingers
and tired we were of breaking and being yelled at by beardless bums
but thought about the beards at home we loved
and gave a smile and a wave nonetheless

Who were sick and tired of driving by nine
but then had four more hours still
with half a tank
then a third of a tank
then a quarter of a tank
then no tank at all
except for the great artillery halt and discovery
of our tyre having only three quarters of its bolts

Saved by the local sobriety
and the mystic conscious kindness of the wise and the elderly
and the strangers: Autoshop Gale with her discount familiar kindness;
Hilda making ready supper and Ray like I’ve known you for years
that offered me tools whose functions I’ve never known
and a handshake goodbye

     and "yes we will say hello to your son in Alberta"
     and "yes we will continue safely"
     and "no you won’t see us in tomorrow’s paper"
     and tired I was of hearing about us in tomorrow’s paper

Who ended up on a road laughing deliverance
in Ralphton, a small town hunting lodge
full of flapjacks and a choir of chainsaws
with cheap tomato juice and eggs
but the four of us ended up paying for eight anyway

and these wooden alley cats were nothing but hounds
and the backwoods is where you’d find a cheap child's banjo
and cheap leather shoes and bear traps and rat traps
and the kinds of things you’d fall into face first

Who sauntered into a cafe in Massey
that just opened up two weeks previous
where the food was warm and made from home
and the owner who swore to high heaven
and piled her Sci-Fi collection to the ceiling
in forms of books and VHS

but Massey herself was drowned in a small town
where there was little history and heavy mist
and the museum was closed for renovations
and the stores were run by diplomats
or sleezebag no-cats
and there was one man who wouldn’t show us a room
because his baby sitter hadn’t come yet
but the babysitter showed up through the backdoor within seconds
though I hadn't seen another face

        and the room was a landfill
        and smelled of stale cat **** anyhow
        and the lobby stacked to the ceiling with empty beer box cans bottles
        and the taps ran cold yellow and hot black through spigots

but we would be staying down the street
at the inn of an East-Indian couple

who’s eyes were not dilated 
and the room smelled
lemon-scented

and kept on driving lovingly without a care in the world
but only one of us had his arms around a girl
and how lonely I felt driving with Jacob
in the fog of the Agawa pass;

following twin red eyes down a steep void mass
where the birch trees have no heads
and the marshes pool under the jagged foothills
that climb from the water above their necks

that form great behemoths
with great voices bellowing and faces chiselled hard looking down
and my own face turned upward toward the rain

Wheels turning on a black asphalt river running uphill around great Superior
that is the ocean that isn’t the ocean but is as big as the sea
and the cloud banks dig deep and terrible walls

and the sky ends five times before night truly falls
and the sun sets slower here than anywhere
but the sky was only two miles high and ten long anyway

The empty train tracks that seldom run
and some rails have been lifted out
with a handful of spikes that now lay dormant

and the hill sides start to resemble *******
or faces or the slow curving back of some great whale

-and those, who were finally stranded at four pumps
with none but the professional Jacob reading great biblical instructions at the nozzle
nowhere at midnight in a town surrounded

by moose roads
                             moose lanes
                                                     moose rivers
and everything mooses

ending up sleeping in the maw of a great white wolf inn
run by Julf or Wolf or John but was German nonetheless

and woke up with radios armed
and arms full
and coffee up to the teeth
with teeth chattering
and I swear to God I saw snowy peaks
but those came to me in waking dream:

"Mountains dressed in white canvas
gowns and me who placed
my hands upon their *******
that filled the sky"

Passing through a buffet of inns and motels
and spending our time unpacking and repacking
and talking about drinking and cheap sandwiches
but me not having a drink in eight days

and in one professional inn we received a professional scamming
and no we would not be staying here again
and what would a trip across the country be like
if there wasn’t one final royal scamming to be had

and dreams start to return to me from years of dreamless sleep:

and I dream of hers back home
and ribbons in a raven black lattice of hair
and Cassadaic exploits with soft but honest words

and being on time with the trains across the plains  
and the moon with a shower of prairie blonde
and one of my father with kind words
and my mother on a bicycle reassuring my every decision

Passing eventually through great plains of vast nothingness
but was disappointed in seeing that I could see
and that the rumours were false
and that nothingness really had a population
and that the great flat land has bumps and curves and etchings and textures too

beautiful bright golden yellow like sprawling fingers
white knuckled ablaze reaching up toward the sun
that in this world had only one sky that lasted a thousand years

and prairie driving lasts no more than a mountain peak
and points of ember that softly sigh with the one breath
of our cars windows that rushes by with gratitude for your smile

And who was caught up with the madness in the air
with big foaming cigarettes in mouths
who dragged and stuffed down those rolling fumes endlessly
while St. Jacob sang at the way stations and billboards and the radio
which was turned off

and me myself and I running our mouth like the coughing engine
chasing a highway babe known as the Lady Valkyrie out from Winnipeg
all the way to Saskatoon driving all day without ever slowing down
and eating up all our gas like pez and finally catching her;

      Valkyrie who taught me to drive fast
      and hovering 175 in slipstreams
      and flowing behind her like a great ghost Cassady ******* in dreamland Nebraska
      only 10 highway crossings counted from home.

Lady Valkyrie who took me West.
Lady Valkyrie who burst my wings into flame as I drew a close with the sun.
Lady Valkyrie who had me howl at slender moon;

     who formed as a snowflake
     in the light on the street
     and was gone by morning
     before I asked her name

and how are we?
and how many?

Even with old Tom devil singing stereo
and riding shotgun the entire trip from day one
singing about his pony, and his own personal flophouse circus,
and what was he building in there?

There is a fair amount of us here in these cars.
Finally at light’s end finding acquiescence in all things
and meeting with her eye one last time; flashed her a wink and there I was, gone.
Down the final highway crossing blowing wind and fancy and mouth puttering off
roaring laughter into the distance like some tremendous Phoenix.

Goodnight Lady Valkyrie.

The evening descends and turns into a sandwich hysteria
as we find ourselves riding between cities of transports
and that one mad man that passed us speeding crazy
and almost hit head-on with Him flowing East

and passed more and more until he was head of the line
but me driving mad lunacy followed his tail to the bumper
passing fifteen trucks total to find our other car
and felt the great turbine pull of acceleration that was not mine

mad-stacked behind two great beasts
and everyone thought us moon-crazy; Biblical Jake
and Mad Hair Me driving a thousand
eschewing great gusts of wind speed flying

Smashing into the great ephedrine sunset haze of Saskatoon
and hungry for food stuffed with the thoughts of bedsheets
off the highway immediately into the rotting liver of dark downtown
but was greeted by an open Hertz garage
with a five-piece fanfare brass barrage
William Tell and a Debussy Reverie
and found our way to bedsheets most comfortably

Driving out of Saskatoon feeling distance behind me.
Finding nothing but the dead and hollow corpses of roadside ventures;

more carcasses than cars
and one as big as a moose
and one as big as a bear
and no hairier

and driving out of sunshine plain reading comic book strip billboards
and trees start to build up momentum
and remembering our secret fungi in the glove compartment
that we drove three thousand kilometres without remembering

and we had a "Jesus Jacob, put it away brother"
and went screaming blinded by smoke and paranoia
and three swerves got us right
and we hugged the holy white line until twilight

And driving until the night again takes me foremast
and knows my secret fear in her *****
as the road turns into a lucid *** black and makes me dizzy
and every shadow is a moose and a wildcat and a billy goat
and some other car

and I find myself driving faster up this great slanderous waterfall until I meet eye
with another at a thousand feet horizontal

then two eyes

then a thousand wide-eyed peaks stretching faces upturned to the celestial black
with clouds laid flat as if some angel were sleeping ******* on a smokestack
and the mountains make themselves clear to me after waiting a lifetime for a glimpse
then they shy away behind some old lamppost and I don’t see them until tomorrow

and even tomorrow brings a greater distance with the sunlight dividing stone like 'The Ancient of Days'
and moving forward puts all into perspective

while false cabins give way
and the gas stations give way
and the last lamppost gives way
and its only distance now that will make you true
and make your peaks come alive

Like a bullrush, great grey slopes leap forth as if branded by fire
then the first peaks take me by surprise
and I’m told that these are nothing but children to their parents
and the roads curve into a gentle valley
and we’re in the feeding zone

behind the gates of some great geological zoo
watching these lumbering beasts
finishing up some great tribal *******
because tomorrow they will be shrunk
and tomorrow ever-after smaller

Nonetheless, breathless in turn I became
it began snowing and the pines took on a different shape
and the mountains became covered white
and great glaciers could be seen creeping
and tourists seen gawking at waterfalls and waterfowls
and fowl play between two stones a thousand miles high

climbing these Jasper slopes flying against wind and stone
and every creak lets out its gentle tone and soft moans
as these tyres rub flat against your back
your ancient skin your rock-hard bones

and this peak is that peak and it’s this one too
and that’s Temple, and that’s Whistler
and that’s Glasgow and that’s Whistler again
and those are the Three Sisters with ******* ablaze

and soft glowing haze your sun sets again among your peaks
and we wonder how all these caves formed
and marvelled at what the flood brought to your feet
as roads lay wasted by the roadside

in the epiphany of 3:00am realizing
that great Alta's straights and highway crossings
are formed in torturous mess from mines of 'Mt. Bleed'
and broken ribs and liver of crushed mountain passes
and the grey stones taxidermied and peeled off
and laid flat painted black and yellow;
the highways built from the insides
of the mountain shells

Who gave a “What now. New-Brunswick?”

and a “What now, Quebec, and Ontario, and Manitoba, and Saskatchewan";
**** fools clumsily dancing in the valleys; then the rolling hills; then the sea that was a lake
then the prairies and not yet the mountains;

running naked in formation with me at the lead
and running naked giving the finger to the moon
and the contrails, and every passing blur on the highway
dodging rocks, and sandbars
and the watchful eye of Mr. and Mrs. Law
and holes dug-up by prairie dogs
and watching with no music
as the family caravans drove on by

but drove off laughing every time until two got anxious for bed and slowed behind
while the rambling Jacob and I had to wait in the half-moon spectacle
of a black-tongue asphalt side-road hacking darts and watching for grizzlies
for the other two to finish up with their birthday *** exploits
though it was nobodies birthday

and then a timezone was between us
 and they were in the distant future
and nobodies birthday was in an hour from now

then everything was good
and everyone was satiated
then everything was a different time again
and I was running on no sleep or a lot of it
leaping backward in time every so often
like gaining a new day but losing space on the surface of your eye

but I stared up through curtains of starlight to mother moon
and wondered if you also stared
and was dumbfounded by the majesty of it all

and only one Caribou was seen the entire trip
and only one live animal, and some forsaken deer
and only a snake or a lonesome caterpillar could be seen crossing such highway straights
but the water more refreshing and brighter than steel
and glittered as if it were hiding some celestial gem
and great ravines and valleys flowed between everything
and I saw in my own eye prehistoric beasts roaming catastrophe upon these plains
but the peaks grew ever higher and I left the ground behind
thirty years of truckin down each and every road
bodys getting old gone in to overload
all the years of driving  took its toll on me
i am not as young as i you used to be

driving through the day driving through the night
driving miles and miles till the morning light
from denver down to tuscon  gulf of mexico
bodies not the same as all those years ago

driving down the highway in the wind and snow
delivering my haul where it has to go
all the years of trucking took its toll  on me
bodies not the same as it used to be.

driving day to day every here and there
with my aching body driving everywhere
sixteen tons of steel with a heavy load
delivering my haul down each and every road

bodies not the same as it used to be
thirty years of trucking took its toll on me
driving miles and miles each and every day
time for me to stop put my truck away

driving through the day driving through the night
driving miles and miles till the morning light
from denver down to tuscon gulf of mexico
bodies not the same as all those years ago
L Smida Feb 2013
Ask me why I don't like to drive
I will give you the easiest of all answers
It's because I have to put full trust in complete strangers that get behind the wheel of vehicles that have the ability to **** people if not used correctly
Half of the people are selfish idiots who don't give a flying ****
And I don't even like trusting people to begin with
Even people that I know very well
People that do give a ****

I have to trust that you'll stop at that big red stop sign as I'm cautiously pulling through the intersection
I have to trust that that red light there is going to retain your hurried monstrous being from crossing my path
I have to trust that all you rowdy strangers are actually driving with the correct licenses
If one at all
I hold my breath driving through town hoping that no one will floor it out of a parking lot to cut me off
Even when there are absolutely no other cars around
Making me slam on my brakes is easier for you than to wait for two seconds to let me pass
That'd be inevitable
It's like no one even sees me on the road
I'm as invisible as a ghost
Either that or the judgement is way off
Any slight amount of doubt whether you'll make it or not
Should be handled by waiting
Because that doubt about not making it could turn into a full certainty when you're smashed into someone else

But it happens all the time without fail
I cannot drive through town without getting ******* at someone's stupidity
People hate waiting
Even if its only for two seconds
And I don't get it
Where do you possibly have to be that's so **** important
Everyone is constantly in a hurry all the time
FYI, driving slow and taking your time saves so much gasoline it's not even funny
If you wanna stop complaining about burning through gas,
Just drive slower
It won't **** you
It actually might save you
(Ex: it use to take me a quarter tank of gas to get to school and back when driving 70-80 MPH. I was following the speed of traffic. Now I drive the speed limit which is 55. My gas needle does not move!)

Driving under the influence?
Only god knows
Don't get me wrong
Some drugs are awesome
But not while driving
Putting other people's lives at risk by driving with a foggy head?
(Babies, children, families)
Not cool whatsoever
Do you care at all
Obviously not if you're doing so
Who cares if you **** someone
Everyone does it
It happens all the time
I have to trust that you wild human beings are watching the roads and being alert
But I already know that you are not concerned in the least bit to watch where you're going
Heaven for bid you put down that phone for more than three minutes

I don't like having this paranoia chewing on my gut every time I need to go somewhere
I have my headlights on 95% of the time
Why?
So people can easily see me coming
What do I see when I drive?
No one because people don't drive with their headlights on during a ******* blizzard or heavy rain
Hell! People don't drive with their headlights on in the ****** dark
Let alone a little rain
Someone ran me off the road once because they weren't paying attention and they totaled my beautiful ******* car
In plain day light
Basically T-***** me right into a ditch
Why?
Because he couldn't take one tiny second out of his very important life to stop at a ****** ******* stop sign?!?
And by conserving that second he slowed us both down by painfully whole hours
He ruined my whole month
Ruined my whole driving career
Because I carry around this paranoia chained to my leg that weighs about as much as a boulder
Giving me all these hellish problems that could've easily been avoided
You can see why I hate driving with a burning passion
No one follows the rules
I hate watching out for morons when it shouldn't need to be done

This is what bothers the **** out of me
They are giving licenses to ANYONE now a days
The ******* driving test is suppose to be a hard ******* test
They need to make it harder in my opinion
If its one thing that I wish people would do
Is follow the traffic laws
If everyone did that
We wouldn't need insurance
We wouldn't have problems
We wouldn't have to cuss at each other and get enraged
Road rage wouldn't exist
I wouldn't have to drive and get a heart attack every time someone swerves in front of me
I don't like having random obstacles like that

I drive the speed limit
Why?
Because if someone hits me
I won't get blamed
You don't like how I drive?
You can't complain because I follow all the rules
You can't say a **** word about it
I like being relaxed when I drive
I leave myself enough time to get to my planned destination
I don't like to rush around because that's the number one thing that ***** people up
You hurry and your mind forgets every little ****
If you're late and you're stuck behind me going 40 in a 35
Sorry Bub but I ain't gonna go any faster for you
I do not want to get into an accident and have to deal with all that **** again
Or get pulled over and have the little money I have get ****** outta my pockets
Not gonna happen
Get into an accident and see how you like it
Get pulled over and waste money
Go head
Be my guest
Afterwards, I bet you'll give the road 50% more of your undivided attention
Bad mood rant.... :/
i am trucking cowboy truckings all i know
dont have time to think just get up and go
no matter what the weather dosent bother me
rolling  down the highway rolling wild and free,

driving through the night driving through the day
driving anywhere miles and miles away
i can feel the freedom as i drive along
listen to the radio play a good ole country song

watching all the headlights lighting up the night
driving down the highway in the lights so bright
in my trucking home it makes me feel so free
brings a sense of freedom wakes the soul in me.

i am trucking cowboy truckings all i know
dont have time to think just get up and go
no matter what the weather dosent bother me
rolling  down the highway rolling wild and free,

driving miles and miles i really just dont care
driving any place driving anywhere
in my trucking home it makes me feel so free
brings a sense of freedom wakes the soul in me.

driving miles and miles driving anywhere
no matter where i go i dont really care
i can feel the freedom as i drive along
listen to the radio play a good ole country song

i am trucking cowboy truckings all i know
dont have time to think just get up and go
no matter what the weather dosent bother me
rolling  down the highway rolling wild and free,
thirty years of truckin down each and every road
bodies started aching with its overload
all the trucking years as took its toll on me
now im not as young as i you used to be

driving through the day driving through the night
driving miles and miles till the morning light
from denver down to tuscon gulf of mexico
bodies not the same as all those years ago

driving every highway in the wind and snow
delivering my haul every where i go
all the years of trucking took its toll  on me
different from the time i was young and free

driving day to day every here and there
with my aching body driving everywhere
sixteen tons of steel with a heavy load
delivering my haul down each and every road

bodies not the same as it used to be
thirty years of trucking took its toll on me
driving miles and miles each and every day
time for me to stop put my truck away

driving through the day driving through the night
driving miles and miles till the morning light
from denver down to tuscon gulf of mexico
bodies not the same as all those years ago
I'm driving
and i'm remembering
a dream I had
And you were there, and I was there
and I'm driving
driving on the dark, empty streets
(the city can't afford to keep the lights on)
And in my dream you came to bed with me
You kissed me
A honey kiss
Sticky & sweet, leaving your nectar on my lips
leaving me wishing I had more
And I'm driving, still.
remembering more things,
but they aren't that important
Nothing really feels important
Except you kissed me
that sweet surprise of a kiss
the kind of kiss in a French New Wave film
And i'm driving
And i'm remembering
It was just a dream.
Judas May 2016
We are in a car driving fast.
We've been driving to different places.
We've been to seas, parks, and mars.
We even travelled past the stars.

We are in a car driving fast.
We don't even stop on red light.
We drive without license and permit
But cops don't bother anyway.

Because we are in a car driving fast.
Stop, caution, go, they don't matter.
As long as I can smell your sweet scent
Right beside me on the front seat.

We are in a car driving fast.
Fast enough for me to forget my name
And get lost in the long road
Because my eyes are not on it,

But on you
As we drive fast in the car.
Big Virge May 2019
These Days ...
Let Me Tell You ...
I'm ... TIRED of Driving ... !!!

But HELL NO ...
I AIN'T ... " Riding " ... !!!!!

Cos' ...
When I See How Some Drive ...
It's Like They're ... IMPROVISING ... ?!!!?

There Was A Time ....

LONG Ago .................................................................­......

When It Was ...
FUN To Drive ... !!!

But ...
Nowadays' I'm Quite Pleased ...
To ... Get Back Home ALIVE ... !!!!!

I'll Explain What I Mean ...

This ...

ROAD RAGE ... Behaviour ...
Is Simply ... OBSCENE ... !!!

The Language In Use ...
Is REALLY ... UNCLEAN ... !!!

From GROWN Men To Women ...
To Those In Their Teens ...

I Just ... Can't Believe ...
The Things That I've Seen ... !?!?!

Men ...
REVERSING ... Down Roads ... ?!!!?
To AVOID Those ..................... They Goad .........

It's Like ...
They Thought That ... " Their Car " ...
Could Stop Them ... Taking BLOWS ... ?!?

The Words In This Prose ...
Simply ... Go To SHOW ...
That ... Actions You Take ...
When Driving On Road ...
Can Possibly Leave You ... ?
With Blood On Your Nose ... !!!

Or ...
EVEN WORSE Still ...
Bring Your Life ...
To A ... PREMATURE Close ... !!!!

I'm Learning These Days ...
To Just ..... Keep My Cool .....
and AVOID These Young Fools ...

cos' Young Drivers These Days ...
Like To Drive Round With ... " TOOLS " ... !!!

Knives and ... GUNS ...
They Keep ...

"Stashed In Their Boot" ... !!!!!

This Story ...
... IS TRUE ... !!!

One Day I Was Driving ...
Behind A ... " Young Group " ...

Who ...
THOUGHT They Were TOUGH ... !!!
And Were Acting ... UNCOUTH ... !!!

Their ... IGNORANT Driving ...
Made Me ... HIT THE ROOF ... !!!!!

I Was ... ON MY OWN ...
There Were ... THREE of Them ...

I ... Beeped My Horn ...

Next Thing ...
They Jumped OUT ...
of Their ... "BLACKED OUT BM' " ...

A MATCHSTICK White Boy ...
and Two ... Asian Men ...

In FACT ...
They Were ... " Boys " ...
With A ... ******* PROBLEM ... !!!!!

I Was Feeling ... "low" ...
and READY To ... BLOW ... !!!

I Parked ... IN THE ROAD ...
So ... NO-ONE Could Go ... !!!!

I QUICKLY Advised ...
As I Looked In Their Eyes ... !!!

"Let's go, if your ready !
I'm ready to die !"

"Whoa, Hold on now bro !"

Said The ...

" little " ... White Guy ...
The Driver ... Complied ...

BUT Their ...
Drugged Up Companion ...
STILL Wanted To ... " TRY " ... ?!?

I Told Them ...

"Just GO !"

They QUICKLY ...
Said ... Goodbye ... !!!

I Believe I'm Now LUCKY ...
To ... STILL BE ALIVE ... !!!

Just DRIVING ... These Days ...
Can Be A ... " Fight For YOUR LIFE " ... !!?!!

DRIVING ...
... Is A PAIN ... !!!

PARKING ...
... Is The Same ... !!!

Parking Attendants ...
Don't Seem To Have SHAME ... !!!

They're Making Us PAY ...
For These ... " Parking Campaigns " ... ?

THIEVES and LIARS ... !!!
Are Now Up For ... HIRE ... !!!

WILLING ...

To Take ... "Bribes" ... !!!
From Your ... " Average Guy " ...
To Make Themselves Money ...
From FALSE ... " Parking Fines " ... !!!!!

Working In ... " Teams " ...
With ... TARGET Led Guides ...

If YOU ... FAIL The Team ...
Your Dubbed The BAD GUY ... !!!

In LONDON Alone ...
They're ASSAULTED Each Day ... !!!

BUT It's ... NO SURPRISE ...
The Way They Behave ... !!!

The Things They CAN DO ...
Have Left Me ... AMAZED ... !?!

If You ...

Offer Them CASH ...
For A Fine You Must Pay ...

Some Attendants ...
Have ... " Methods " ...
To Get Them ... ERASED ... !!!

For ....

HALF of The Price ... !!!
Man ... What A DISGRACE ... !!!!!!

You Drive AROUND Town ...
Just To Get A ****** SPACE ... !!!!!

Only To Find ................
A ... Uniformed CRIMINAL ...
LYING ... In Wait ... !!!?!!! ...

I'm NOT EVEN ... Gonna Start ...
On The ... CONGESTION CHARGE ... !!!!!

Creators of THIS ...
Are CON MEN With BIG CARS ... !!!!!
With CHAUFFEURS Who DRIVE THEM ...

This Charge Is A ... FARCE ... !!!

BILLIONS Are Paid ...
To Drive Cars These days ... !!!!!

But FOOLS Are ... "Complying" ...
To Hold TRUTH ... "In Hiding" ...

From Speed Cams' ...
To .... FINES .....

These Schemes Are ...
... " Conniving " ...

and These Are ...
Some of The Reasons ...

I'm TIRED of ..........

.... " Driving " .... !!!!!
After seeing a documentary on the BBC that showed the level of corruption attendants were involved in, plus the general slog of just getting home, I wrote this, soon after the incident I mention, in the poem, that I was involved in .....

One of a few I had before leaving London ..... It seems worse NOW !!!!!
Anthony Mayfield Jul 2018
Driving up slowly...
Park across the street.
Nobody should know where we meet.
Walking up slowly...
Wishing I was drunk.
At least that would explain my funk.

Now I’m peering,
Peeling off my skin.
There’s no healing;
It’s a game you can’t win.

Now I’m driving up slowly...
And making myself go home.
The things I do,
To let myself roam.
Now I’m driving up slowly...
Two hours before I’m home.
All this effort...
And nothing to show

Writing silently...
The words aren’t coming
Like I planned.
I pray someday that someone understands...
Because I don’t.

Driving alone,
Driving alone.
Home is not so lonely...
When I’m driving up slowly.
So, I’m coming home.
Yes, I’m coming home.
Sometimes it takes a tryst to realize where you really belong
spacewalker Oct 2021
The turn to my house was three miles back.
it doesn’t matter, my minds gone black.

I keep driving

A dark sadness overwhelms me
as tears fly off my window.
four miles away,
I’m far from my pillow.
  
I keep driving

A park I just passed
has kids playing in the rain
Who’s going to tell them their happiness
won’t last?

I keep driving

Five miles now, but I’m in the same place,
same problems,
same people,
same demons to face.

I keep driving

Maybe I’m meant be alone in my thoughts.
I don’t know where I am,
in every sense I’m lost .
Six miles from where I should be
even when I’m home,
my house stands empty

I keep driving,
          and driving,
               and driving

Until I open my eyes to find my turn single blinking.
With a sigh of defeat,
I turn onto my street,
there’s no point in running anyway
APari  Jul 2012
What is Life
APari Jul 2012
What is Life?

Life is getting out of bed tired this morning, snailing to the bathroom, and finding out that my sister has left the top of the toothpaste ***** again. Life is drinking orange juice with that toothpaste taste still in my mouth.
Life is driving to school and missing the right ramp to get off of the highway.
It is cussing loudly in an empty car.

Life is coasting down the highway in between two huge, Moses-parting-the-red-sea, concrete walls.

It is reminiscing about magnificent popsicles from the ice cream man.
Life is realizing how ***** the ice cream man’s van really was.
Life is being that one kid whose dad bought him a pink bike at a garage sale.
Life is losing the reader before the poem even began.

Life is “Santa clause is real but not in the way you thought he was.”
Life is always being too obvious or being inscrutable.
Life is having a correct answer on a test then changing it.

I look out the window and see the night sky —millions of blinking glass shards on black pavement.
Life is craving to drive on that endless milky road instead of the road you are driving on to get to your school at three o’clock in the morning.
Life is driving an extra ten minutes because you missed that exit on the highway.
Life is the High School Cafeteria.
Life is your best friend who stabs you in the back.
No it’s not, life is like not having any best friend in the first place but telling your parents you do.
Life is arriving at school and entering through a pre-opened window in the dark then climbing through the vents in order to break into the math office to steal the semester exam answers.
Life is stopping - and turning back at the last minute and driving home to probably fail the test and class the next day.
Life is the divorce rate in America.
Life is the same boring start of a line over and over again.
Life is people politely nodding and saying “Yah” even if they couldn’t understand what you said.
Life is teens throwing handfuls of coins at each other’s (parents’) cars for fun at the stop light before getting on to the highway.
Life is the beggar watching them from the side of the street in the cold.

Life is not noticing that there are a lot of cars on the highway at this time of night.
Life is driving home at four o’clock in the morning.
Life is imagining your warm bed while you drive.
Life is breathing more slowly.
Life is the mellow rhythm of the highway humming underneath your wheels.
The music rocks on “Life is life, na na na na na.”
Life is soul-stirring music making you tired.
Life is a small brook bubbling silently through some far away woods.
Life is closing your eyes while driving for only three seconds.

I **** my eyes open just as sheets of heat from the air conditioning cover my body.

Life is the confidence that you can stay awake with your eyes shut for longer this time.
It is closing your eyes for 6 seconds. Then another 6 seconds.
Life is the reader knowing that you will close your eyes for 6 seconds a third time. It is them reading on excitedly.
Life is splattered all over the side of the highway.
Then life is the traffic flying past the spotless side of the highway the next day.

“What is life?”

Life is the disappointing last line of a poem.
“that’s a Simpson’s sky,” you say,
pointing to the fluff strewn across the highway sky,
I smile and nod, concentrating on the music

we’re driving to Cornwall in the curb lane,
pointedly avoiding what’s uppermost,
halfway there from Toronto

“driving makes me think,” I think to myself
and turn up the volume on Buddha Bar III
and talking fades into the rearview mirror

black Firebird, racing stripes, eager to pass me
I hold steady – he should know how to use the passing lane!
he bobs and weaves and nips at my fender

it washes in waves over you so palpably
I feel it crash on my shoulder -
your father passed away yesterday

rolling the window down slightly, you light a cigarette
I roll down mine and light up, too
our ritual – one feeding off the other

we’re driving to Cornwall, to family,
to mother, alone now among children
“what will you say to her?” I ask you silently

we’re driving to Cornwall
towards loss, towards hope
with a black Firebird close behind

I move the wheel slightly
to avoid a can of Pepsi rolling in the lane
the rear-view mirror catches the firebird

deliberately swerve to hit it and exlode
its contents in a little puff of vapour -
highway music



bonaventure saptel

— The End —