I've heard it said so many times
"You have to know yourself before you get into a serious relationship"

No one ever mentions that a relationship changes you
I'm not the person I thought I knew 9 months ago but that's okay

I'm better

They should say
"You'll meet yourself in a relationship"

Here we are
We have finally made it
At this fine hour we cross over
We are no longer part of the group known as minors
Now in the state's eyes we are “adults”
But are we really ?
No, we are not.
I cannot possibly feel like an adult for I can not behave like one
People still say “hey kid”
People deny me from buying my own cigarettes
But if I'm still a kid then why am I working as hard as my parents?
Why am I living on my own in my mother's home?
Why am I allowed to enjoy other people but not enjoy a smoke once in awhile?
Why am I able to give my life for this country but not buy a drink?
If we sit here and think
About what it means to be eighteen
We soon we will see
That there really is no meaning.

Biting into the crust of an evening reminiscent of you.*

Your crown was  
immaculate, your kingdom over-
grown with red ferns and dandelions up
the side of the fence in the back
yard where I'll meet you behind
the shed, under
the shadow of daybreak

with red ferns and
dandelions. A cloak sewn
from innocence, pushing against the weeds
breaking up--through
the side of the fence in the back yard
Where I meet you.

Your voice slurred in deep tongues,
licking up the side of the fence in the back yard.
Where I met you.

Smothered in red ferns
and dandelions.
We watched them grow
up and over the side of the fence in the back yard
Where I'd met you.  
From time

to time.

I'd watch
as the sunset colored you red,
painted me yellow
until we both
blurred into the night.
Before we even had a chance to crumble into
the crisp embrace of an evening.

Firstly Hand me over to the pouring rain
Let me be soaked in that flooring pain
Be sure to let me me enjoy my goring gain

For I surely believe not in my plastic fame,but
Let me enjoy this acidic game I designed , Cos
I   know not  the rules of this drastic shame

Lastly Let me enjoy my intoxicating
Oxytocin that preserves my metamorphosis
To an ignominious state that will prevail
Through my youthful altercations.

the pinnacle of childhood
comes with the symphony of adolescence.
the realization that life is evanescent,
the breaking of cyclical routine,
catalyzing the bittersweet epiphany
of long-awaited nirvana.
no longer blithe and naïve,
quaff from the chalice of clemency
until intoxicated with the notion
of no longer being in limbo.
the mendacious oblivion of childhood evaporates,
lifting the veil of soporific innocence,
all traces of puerility gone.
come,
enter the province of adulthood,
and live as a free soul,
no longer required to conform
to the standards of ascetics.

Summertime blues
feeling
down n’ out
gut out
passed out
on the street corner
where I hear
a familiar song
Deadhead born a generation late
never suited me anyway
just trying to be cool
but it’s too hot
I’m melting
I’ll become something
completely new
original
leaving behind what I was
I’m changing
for better
or maybe for worse
I know I’m not perfect
growing up *****
when you first see the mold
and it starts to fit
stick to you
like sweat on a
hot summer day
when you just want to
liquify
seep through the cracks
and drain where they aren’t
watching
judging
expecting
you to sublime
into something
be someone
go somewhere
even if
you drain into the gutter
out to sea
or if you just take a bus
to California
where the beaches
are cool
where the people
are cool
where you can just feel
your problems melt away
your lover is there
waiting on the beach
waiting for you
lover boy
just go for it
what’s to lose?
just go for it
strike a match
let it burn
catch fire
and let your heart explode
lock lips
and set her heart ablaze
shoot off
like a rocket
take a look at yourself
where did you land?
or did you just burn up
on re-entry?
did you see it coming?
did you see her coming?
did you see you coming?
‘cause you were really
cool
when you were
burning bright
you did it
tiger
you shot for the red-hot stars
you wanted to shoot for
and you made it

I thought I'd grow up and become a cloud ranger;
I wasn't ready to live a life aligned.

I couldn't become a fin grazer;
I've barely skimmed the surface of this life.

I was this synthetic stranger--
too unfamiliar with my own mind...

Life was pure when it was linear

And not some bird

-short-lived

-unbalanced

-unaware

-somewhere.

That tore off it's own wings to land itself right here.

When I couldn't see where I was going I--
believed songs. They could. --they might. tell. lies.

I didn't see where I was going I
I didn't think I could go that high
I didn't think I could fly
(What are they going to remember me by)

I didn't see what was coming I
I thought this song could save my eyes
I was wrong. Well,
Maybe I was right?

Because diamonds meant more to me than saving a life.

In the end, I didn't think I would become a butterfly;
I thought I'd become what the airplanes leave behind.

Growing up is tough, you see
Making choices
Weighing possibilities
Not even 20 in
Planning the next 50
Maybe 60
Maybe more

Staring at each open door
Choosing which to shut,
Which to explore
Remembering my childhood
Wanting 1 last year
Maybe 2
Maybe more

I can't go back, I know
Only forward
Ever onward
Into my future I go