It's a risky idea
you should give it some thought.
The wheels are in motion
and all stock is bought.

I'm thinking so fast
and I know what comes next.
No longer enthused
'cause my hyper can't last.

Did you take all your tablets?
The one's that restrain you.
Taking off in your spaceship
that's called hyper mania.

Super-thusiastic poetry
by Kaydee.
Bi-Polar Disorder Factsheet link;
Dark Feign Jan 7
Another day, another ache
my mind is just a total blank
I punch these keys, to no avail
but won’t allow myself to fail
I feel so useless, feel so dumb
I struggle, but the words won’t come
a waste of space, a waste of time
I lost that spark I had inside

I used to have so much to write
sometimes it’d keep me up at night
now where it was, there’s just an ache
my mind is still a total blank
still punching keys, to no avail
another try, another fail
I’m such a failure, i’m so dumb
these ******* words won’t seem to come

a waste of time, a waste of space
my failure stares me in the face
or maybe at another time
I can put something in these lines
or maybe some good tunes would help
no, i’m just lying to myself
I lost that spark I had inside
my life is just a waste of time
re-post from Dec
Dark Feign Dec 2018
until I lost some weight
now people fear I’ll waste away
too quiet
‘til I speak my mind
now they’re all ******,
wish I would die
wear too much black
wear pink one day
now everyone assumes I’m ***
work out an hour,
now I’m crazy
I take a break
now i’m too lazy
the truths I tell
become a lie
all people do is criticize
too meek
too weak
an ***
too crass
It doesn’t change
until I die
nobody will be satisfied
can't please everybody... or, anybody, in my case. But f**k 'em
Elisabeth Nov 2018
laying in a warm patch of sunlight surrounded by dandelions

and an orange glow peaks through my closed eyelids

leaving an ache behind my forehead


of no more teary days

no more chilly hands or goosepimples

of a day when my patch of sunlight lasts for an eternity

and the sun never sets in order for the moon to rise

and I never get cold
Lynn Nov 2018
The world is keeping secrets from me
maybe that the reason I bleed and fall
maybe I'm just growing closer to learning it all.

Maybe that's the reason I plead
for some sort of secret sweet release;
so I can learn the secrets
that the world keeps from me.

Jamie Lee Oct 2018
One X on the calander and a cup of luke warm coffee
The sidewalk chalk is like padlocks on my feet,
But they cant stop me
Through a static phone line, I can still hear you talking
Nothing of the nice sorts-
It is impure and not godly

Your perception of me slips through the cracks of you teeth
Bitter and raw things you breathe
Your voice is muddy and meek
Another X on the calander
Not a lot of sleep in between

I am wondering where your love went, because it doesnt live here
How many Xs on the calander?
A few weeks? A month? A year?
Both the liquor and the answer is clear

Long car rides spent swallowing sentences
Its a muffled radio, singing along with the tention
Where did you heart go? Every beat a lease of absence
Where did you put it? In a drawer or a cabnet?
How many Xs on the calander will it be till I once again have it
Anno Oct 2018
I have this announcer
In my head
Speaking through a mic
broadcasting my sensational endeavor
I decided to do that year
only to follow up half way
Because of manic episodes
Composed of unorganized perfection
And useless, jumbled words
That often didn’t make sense
But the announcer never failed
Using their echoing voice
Overpowering all other thoughts
Would debut some idea
Making me feel
Abigail Sep 2018
My worry consumes me
My thoughts are scattered
Much like the trash in my messy room
My heart aches so terribly
I can feel the pain of it in my belly

The sharp pieces from my broken heart spill from my mouth
They cut the people I love wide open
They bleed out
Suddenly, I am sick of me

I wonder how I got this way
Was it the hand slipping under my shirt, unwelcomed?
Was it because of all the spoons with burnt backs?
Was it the visions of my mother’s swollen face?
I want to know what the **** it was that made me so hideous

Alas, I don’t have the answers
And while the weight of the world is not on my shoulders
It is certainly on my mind
It is certainly in my heart
And I pray that one day I might rest
Ashtyn Lucas Sep 2018
Sitting in front of
The people I love
Hiding from them
My feelings in a cove

The sadness seeps
Up from my broken heart
To my eyes as they search
For a place to start

A place to start
With a knife in my hand
The thin lines as the pierce
The blood pooling in the sand

You hide them the next day
The cuts along your arms
To make sure no one sees them
You raise your alarm

Not a day goes by
That you don't see the scars
From so many years ago
Straight lines across your arms

Years later you know
How the cuts didn't help
All they did was curse you
With the pain that you felt

Each day a reminder
Of the way you made
Made yourself feel better
By giving yourself pain

Scarred for life
Both mentally and physically
You now know why you should never
Never show your vulnerability
Started again a few days ago...but I'm doing fine :) It doesn't help, so please don't harm yourselves.
Anno Apr 2018
Too spun to know the sound of pain
But the notes are there
Everyone's feelings are different
Time is medicine
Among other clichés
But feelings should be humbled
Time as an hourglass
stretching across the desert
An eternity to heal
An eternity to forget
Needles to the skin
Lonely painted rooms
Yearning for attention
The house, an empty cardboard box
What alone really means
A golden shrine to kneel in front of
A stone to plant flowers
Bringing about memories
A slap on the face
Black and white movies
Humming an unknown tune
The taste of salt lingers
Presence no longer with us
I searched for traces of her existence
The voice
Gentle hands
I found her hoard of papers
Among them,
One I wrote
About how I cannot connect with family
stomach voided
wanting to connect with you
Chest tightens
I just didn't know how
And here it goes again
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