> if the world was ending of course I’d tell you I loved you, I loved you with all of my heart, so much that I couldn’t bear to tell you because even if you loved me a little (i know you do but do you?) I would’ve run into your arms, I’d be happy for a thousand lives over, of course
> and maybe I would tell you that I was never able to think about the love I had for you in the present tense, I loved you and I will love you but I do not love you, if it’s in the past or in the future it’s less of a part of me and that is okay
> if the world was ending maybe I’d tell you that I could never decipher whether the love I had for you was platonic or romantic or something in between and that sometimes I wondered if I only held onto the feelings so I could write more poetry
> maybe I’d admit that I wrote the most beautiful words for you, that sometimes even my own words evoked tears in the corners of my eyes because such a crude emotion was poured into that writing
> maybe I would tell you that recently i wasn’t able to think of you apart from love
> and maybe I would tell you that apart from staying awake at night and seeing you in my dreams I wouldn’t admit that you lived in my heart
> maybe i would tell you that i couldn't look at your face for too long because what if i ended up staring at you and (worse) what if i ended up gazing at you, that would not be good
> if the world was ending i'd reveal that the only way i kept a lid on my feelings was limiting how i felt to 'maybes' and 'what ifs', anything more was embarrassing
> maybe i'd tell you that you're my soulmate and i've never met anyone more alike to me who could at the same time be so different
> and so i'd probably admit i think i love you in a friend way but i've never had a friend that i couldn't bear to let go as much as you
i would tell you that you're my person, and i wouldn't care if i was yours
     > (though right now i really hope i am, probably because the world is not ending; everything changes when there will be no tomorrow, everything changes when all we have is the past)
> i would tell you that i've rarely experienced such an intense emotion, much less for a friend, i would tell you that there's something different about you (is there something different about me?) that makes me dread the day that we part
     > i would tell you how much i feared that we would drift apart, if i could i would hold your hand and never let go (would you let me or would you pull away?)

bad boys prey
on beautiful women
with damaged minds.

you see,

i'm not so good with words,
and cannot weave lines that rhyme,
or compose brilliant poems.


my words,

if only i could find them,
will tell you how much you're beautiful,
about your sweet smile, and your beautiful hair.


i can't wait,

for when we get to hold hands,
when i get to catwalk in your size 42 high heels,
go to a spanish club together, and reminisce why we don't talk about bruno.


i feel so lucky,

thinking about the randomness of how we met,
how you caught me in a way i'll always remember,
or maybe we really are meant to be together?


i always blush,

when i think about your sweet smiles and beautiful hair,
the standing girl emoji and the doll from squid game,
the too many times to count i stare at your beautiful pictures.

the pen is not mighty
the lily is not pure

and blood is not vengeful nor beautiful
it is just red

but i like stories


that white shirt you once wore
now yellow with use
that sweater you've had for years
adorned with the patches
of accidents gone by
that scar on your back
from when you fell off a swing
those lines by your lips
the remnant of a smile
and a smile and a smile

I like stories
i love reading yours

there are rabbits on my moon
divinity in my incense
my oaks stand mighty
my sun rides a chariot


park benches donated in memory
hasty scribbles on classroom benches
superstitions about crows and cows
love stories to make word games

i come from a world of stories
where the people are made
of matter and molecule
of memory and metaphor

i like stories
and this one's my favourite

My mind was bleeding, I was in an ordeal
The snow, my drained soul, it would conceal
Stranded in that hollow lifeless space
Lost I was in his embrace
I saw it somewhere, that light
One that, through the hard times, held me uptight
A beauty and strength of some sort blossomed
And that horrid pain yielded and succumbed
Then came in the punch of reality, so full of heat
And in the ocean I sank forlorn with defeat
Lost in the waves without his protection
It ached me to see my choices’s reflection
I saw it all those 3 years and then
I fell but here I am, I rose again.

I let the death follow me
I do not care if he runs faster than me
So I let the death take the lane we race together
And I hope we can be a friend in the end after

He may finish and win the race
And I may still fight and never know what I face
I realize that the life is not about competition
So I find my own way to know my passion

It is not about I am too young to die
It is about I am a human as long as I can give a beautiful goodbye
Yes, the life is too short to hate
So I practice how the love works and I try to bet

I do not let myself die in pain
And I do not let myself be suffer without gain
I am not afraid if I die now
And I am not afraid if they don't impress me without say, Wow!

Because God flows through my vein
and dances around in my brain

physically I have no symmetry
and it doesn’t even bother me
my physical state is electrical
and internally I am symmetrical

a love so big it's my counterpart
symmetrically matching my flesh parts
an existence created as a work of art
able to outsmart any black heart

understanding this duality
is the best of you loving the best of me
and I believe you will get there eventually
to your own symmetrical mentality