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cigarette burns in my favorite sweater
nasty old cough that won’t get better
as above so below
the smoke billows from out my coat
the walls yellow to match my teeth
skin that cracks like burning leaves
posture like a winding tree
freezing hands and weathered feet
addled stance and hobbled knees
the hazy memory of me
is all that’s left to wander and see
all that’s left to remember me
Jasper 1d
Gum. I,
Breath freshener. I,
Sweet and tasty, till
Spit, forbid
That heavenly warmth
Of being used,
Onto the winter earth,
Ground into flatness,
Losing my wrinkles,
My color,
My soul.
it now comes from a place too close, too easy
not pulled by the slippery roots of an elusive plant
residing deep in the darkness of a well
where words and thought are one
I am worn by age
and loss
and every line
every word
every poem resides
in its own time
when poetry was fire
This   is  comedy   ovah  here      don't  get all  pissy. ...  
If 50 is the new 30  ?
'  , then what the hell does that make 18? …What, negative three? I can’t touch that. That's a felony   AND  a math problem.  turns  out  Judge doesn’t accept algebra as a defense.

50 is the new 30, huh? Okay, okay, then 18 must be.... the new embryo. ?  
Which explains why every time I have to place an order at a fast food joint or something, anytime I gotta interact with these little *******…
dealing with a ******’ teenager these days, am I right?
How do these little ******* even get jobs?
Who would hire them?
They're just like, “Yeah, let's sink the whole ******* business right now slow  quit   who's with  me  ? .” Comes with the built-in torpedo.  Slow  quit ? I got  socks older  than  you .

I feel like I’m babysitting a fetus with cyborg Wi-Fi.

I go to get the   last few hairs that I got left cut and
, you know, this one
She  doesn't even want to put down the phone.
I'm like, “Are you serious? You're gonna try to cut my hair?”
The stylist’s got one hand on the clippers and the other glued to TikTok. I
’m like, “Sweetheart, unless you’re livestreaming my bald spot, can we focus pls?”

You know, I'm not really crazy about how my ears look up there either, but I would like to keep ‘em both.  jeez

Oh my goodness. Can I see the manager?
She   fires back , “Well, I thought Karens were all females.”

18? That’s the new *******  rhats what that is ?
. You're not an adult at 18,  !
you’re some kind of… a larva with three points on your driver’s license.

50 is the new 30? Yeah, my ***.
And my Pinto is the new Learjet.

50 is the new 30, huh? You know, I don't remember needing so many ***** pills at 30.
But, you know, then again, I AM 50. I don't remember too much.
Cept  for  I aint  really lookin  forward  to bangin a 50  yr old  even if  she does  try and  act thirty....  just  sayin ...

Then what the hell does that make 80?

   You  do realize  ...  That means my great-aunt Edna must be the newest pin-up girl.  ah  jeez

Somebody put a lock on the nurseries—***** about to get weird.

  Seriously  though  HOW   is it   supposed to be like the new 30 anyway?
What are we talking here mentally? Is that supposed to be a compliment?
The new roller derby champion?

great-aunt Edna, posing with a feather boa  a long cigarette  and a  triple olive martini,
suddenly the height of “saggy” ****  now ?

Oh God, please tell me that's not a thing.
Please tell me we're NOT  doing that.     Am  I right ?


tip  your  waitress ,  try  the  fish  ....  I'll  be  here  all  week .
Its  part  of  a longer  routine  but  you get the  idea
Before sleep I knot a cardboard tag
to my big toe with baling twine.
Sometimes I think of stapling it -
ritual wants a clean edge.

She tolerates my oddities:
a posterboard of errands above the sink,
tea mug with its brown ring I refuse to clean,
I stand too close when the train arrives,
or climb ladders with one hand full.

Last summer a rogue wave flung me under;
I surfaced broken, collarbone split,
came home wrapped and aching.
She kissed the bruise and laughed,
as if I’d slipped the ocean’s grip,
as if the sea had lost its claim.

I call them accidents to sleep easier,
yet I flood the stove with gas,
strike a match, laugh at the plume,
convinced the fire means I’m alive
even as it scorches my hand.

At night she circles the bed,
tugging at my toe tag
as if it could bind me to her,
carrying me into the cabin,
a weight she won’t release.
I'm roaring towards the sun,
in an aluminum bubble.

My spirit, lacks wings, to fly
but there's a spoiler,
fitted, to the silvery minivan's frame.

So, we drive down the day...
coldly harmonious,
as it glitters back,
in mild flashes.

Memory, is stagnant;
flecks of it shine, back, at me--
capsules, of captured thought,
suspended movement...

the world, itself, becomes gelatinous.

The park, where I almost--
the long-absent faces,
of growing boys, and girls,
concealing toothy monsters.
Unsung heroes, and wandering bards...

Freezing sidewalks,
slanting homes...

places I knew, so well;

they stand, still,
and appear to register
no change, and no difference.

Christ, with his pale, pinned arms,
and pain-stricken face,
gazes down, on all these sins

a placid totem,
on his marbled cross...

an overgrown snowdrop,
crying mildly,

into polluted grasses, below.

A sweet song, emits
from surrounding speakers
and it becomes tangled,
in its own chords.

It breaks, in my throat,
like tinted glass...

and suddenly,
my eyes, are full,
of flooding,
unshed tears.

Their sorrow, needles
at sore, spent cheeks.

The rain, which pinks, soft clay

is hard, and salted,
and as it beats down, onto my skin,

I can feel the sunlight working
its gentle,
tumble-dry magic,

and finessing them clean, again.

I turn my face, away
to stare out, silent,
through the unbroken window.

I'm sobbing, harder, now,
and I have no idea,
how I started...

or why,
it won't stop...

but still, the rain,
rolls down shaky gutters;
unrepentant,
and unrepressed.

The wild weeds, of the garden,
are well-fed, indeed

yet overwatered,
beneath leaky clouds,

and graying seams.
I am not religious; the depiction of Christ is purely observational. Please don't use my comment section to preach or sermonize, thank you.
neth jones Sep 23
.
got to save up to earn a slower death
a more palatable   and rewarding one
medically attended
               cribbed comfy
'won't you cheer me on to the afterlife ?'
.
got to pave my way to a dosing oblivion
whilst my bowls void into clear bags        
with measure marks down the sides
and my muscles lack and sag            
and distress is stretched
                      for all those who may dare pay me a visit
'won't you cheer me on to the afterlife ?'
.
gotta have that great white death    
gotta have clean    clean paperwork
by the book   shuffle off .. no ..
drip off.. good to the last drop
                                        rattle breath and plop
'here's to the afterlife'
.
22/07/25 original version / few changes made
Like dark rain splashing across my skies,
These foaters blur my aging eyes.
And the ears aren't any better, see,
My hearing depends on a battery.
At times my tongue trips on your name;
Or wrong words spill out my brain.
I find hairs where they don't belong,
And crepe skin hanging lose and long.
There's brown spots on my once clear skin,
This aging thing is the real sin.
I creak, I rattle, I leak and prattle,
Cause no one listens when I speak.
But,
Remember this.
I taught you how to use a spoon,
Sang good-night songs in your room.
Tucked you in, made you safe,
Made your home your go to place.
I sat you on your bicycle seat,
And ran behind you down the street.
I walked you to and from your schools,
Shared with you my secret rules.
And when the time comes that I'm gone,
You'll remember I wasn't always wrong.
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