I'm infatuated with an indulgence that is a poison for me

At times it's the best medicine 

Other times it leads to diaries of pain

It makes me gaze at the graying rain

it can cause smiles

It can make me drink awhile

I need it close

And at times I push it far away

It's warmth lets my skin roast

It makes me whisper lies and scream truths no matter what I say

It helps me live a little

And I know it kills me a little more everyday

It can cure a deadly ailment, and cause it all at once when it's done

It teeters me on the border or sober and high

Resistance and addiction

Sickness and medication

I need it want it and can live without it

What about you

If I take your hands into my own,
quivering,
and tattoo your skin with kisses,
passionate,
do you think you'll fall in love with me?

I really want you to love me.
Or maybe it's just 3:33am.

I wish I wasn't
But I am

                      I wish you weren't
                      But you are

I wish we were
But we'll never be


                     It's not you
                     It's not me

I wish I'd stop wishing
for things that cannot be

They said his steps sounded like the ticking of a time bomb.

Her knees were in the dirt.
Blood, sweat and tears filled the earth,
and the sky cracked open.
Come closer, it said.
She shook her head, remembering the slow steps of her father’s father. The yellow fingers that toyed with the fabric between buttons,
The bruises that she wore on her abdomen.
The fear.
The pain.
It’s all the same,
it’s all the same.

There is something between us
Something which is indefinable and inexplicable.
Something unimaginable and something just so fantastic that it can't be defined or even
Written down.

therefore...
Here I stop

Like bricks
Your words hit the floor

And with a bang
Lines crawled across the tiles

Small at first
But more jagged with time

Until they met the walls
And then it all disappeared

I was being ****** into darkness
Wind ripping past my head

My shirt beating against my chest
And all stability gone

I flailed as I fell
For what seemed to be an eternity

My body burning up
The pain unbearable

Now head first
I saw a light below me

It grew closer
As the heat exponentiated

And then
Splash

All too instantly
The inferno stopped

And in it's place
A soul chilling cold

The darkness returned
Now suspended in blue

My body refused to listen
As my heart thumped against its cage

Every beat begged and pleaded
Longing for the company of yours

Overcome with despair and loneliness
This was truly hell