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 Mar 2016 Teo
Birdy
To Jäger.
 Mar 2016 Teo
Birdy
I prefer to lose the grip of me
and my being would traverse
to the brain I made my home in
my little universe

But to lose the touch of this
which I hold so dear
and the only thing which promised me
that would be permanently here

My memory is lacking
and my system is rewriting
my thoughts are the one
which I really should be fighting

I know I know,
You are my friend, dear *****
But I really want to put a stop

A stop to this abuse.
you damaged me more than this alcohol ever could
 Mar 2016 Teo
Birdy
If discovering the planetary body
Where you found your home
Would mean that I get to see you again

Then I would
March through stars
Dance on asteroids and
Befriend moons
Until I'd find you
Until we see again.
 Mar 2016 Teo
Ezre Holland
LoSs
 Mar 2016 Teo
Ezre Holland
I despise the word 'loss",
it implies that something CAN be found,
but I know that I will
Never find you again.
So, next time you see me crying on the street,
don't tell me your sorry for my loss
because
I know your words like the back of my hand,
stolen from a card,
not given by the heart.
 Mar 2016 Teo
Ezre Holland
2 SeCoNdS
 Mar 2016 Teo
Ezre Holland
Its been 2 seconds since I thought about you last,
your final words and dying eyes,
your inability to speak, to say "I Live in you"
I miss that hospice bed and the bloomed gardens
of which you had the best view of.
I miss that last drive home,
it was silent because you were always
the life and soul of us all.
But most of all,
I miss your white body,
lifeless but still present,
soulless but still beautiful.

Its been 2 minutes since I thought about you last,
sitting in the front room hunched in excruciating pain,
watching meaningless TV but it took your mind off of reality,
your masked laughs and your baggy pyjamas that you lived in.
I miss your shaved head, it prepared you for the battle,
you faced the poison head on
Like you always did.
I miss your yellow skin, filled with venom,
your weary face.
But most of all,
I miss your character called Jim who faced everyday like it was somewhat normal.

Its been 2 hours since I thought about you last,
your booming laugh and horrendous screams,
your roars and cries,
your short temper and piercing orbs.
I miss the word "sorry" and your forgiving whisper,
your sausage fingers that would wipe away
my Tsunami tears telling me to "be yourself."
But most of all,
I miss your quiet glances that looked like nothing, but meant
everything

Its been 2 years since I thought about you last,
your grass goatie and soft demenar,
Your protective wolf stance and your idiotic voices.
I miss sitting on the table annoying you.
Your music makes me feels immortal.
I wish you were immortal.

It been 20 years since I thought about you last.
I hate cancer.
I hate God.
I despise that your not here.
But most of all.
I love that you were my smile at the end of my day.

Now

Jump
 Mar 2016 Teo
Ezre Holland
When you left,
it was like a water fall
      the water falls without choice
          but I knew it was my choice to fall with it
to the rock bottom.
 Mar 2016 Teo
Pastell dichter
I would give up my sight,
So you could see how beautiful you are.
I would give up my hearing,
So you could hear all the nice things people say about you.
I would give up my heart,
So you could love your self.
I would give up my voice,
So you could say you love your body.
I would give up my mind,
So you could think about the good things and not the bad.
I would give up every part of me if it would help you.
 Mar 2016 Teo
Ezre Holland
PaTiEnCe
 Mar 2016 Teo
Ezre Holland
I control the wind that whips around you neck,
slowly suffocating you,
I control the waves that pull you in,
never letting you go,
Im the earth that tugs around your feet,
hauling you down,
Im the moon that reflects at that right moment,
blinding you,
I am the rain that shoves your car,
on that busy motorway,
I am the fire that spits at you fiercely,
burning your paper skin.
Patience is survival.
Do not test mine.
 Feb 2016 Teo
Birdy
Zach
 Feb 2016 Teo
Birdy
He was just an arrangement of 1s and 0s
which manifested itself into a body
on the other side of the planet

There were a three times
that he was right beside me
despite him not being there at all

First, he sat on the side of my bed
struck by a drunken haze
when he told me he loved me

Second, he came out of my closet
to keep me from crying
when I thought I lost him

And third, appeared right beside me
when I was walking back home
while the sun was wiping my tears.

I touched him on his shoulder
then he whispered
"I don't know who you are
We have never known each other."
I am going to cry and then I’m going to stop and then cry some more, but I won't tell you thats your fault.
 Feb 2016 Teo
Birdy
Aftermath
 Feb 2016 Teo
Birdy
I longed for death
But that I could not do
I was not scared of death, no
I was afraid of dying without you.
I will live until the day we will be together again
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