I use my silence as a way to hide my anger,
With each passing look I see the nothing that you perceive me as,
It would hurt if only I was not used to the lonlyness,
Sometimes I wonder when our actions gain the company they desire,
Or when asking a lover to leave you be is a sign of fear,
Music causes me to relate to those I hate,
Keeping my blood pumping so that my when the music touches our ears we see who was right,
If I lie it was because I was never lied to,
Everything is my truth it is what has got me this far,
Advertising is the only place where the truth is deafening but ignorance stacks all odds against us,
I apologize for the discombobulated sentences, the silence is yours if you want it,
I wish ro stay silent no longer, but my voice will only be heard when I lie.

If I were to unfold my being into the pages of a never ending book,
Would you pick it up?
If each word next to each other was in a different language,
Would you read it?
If the chapters were written out by days on my life?
Would you grasp it's concept?
If on the title it read "the Daily Thoughts of God's thought,
Would you believe in it?

What of the discussions that would arise from my pages,
Would you argue with or against me?
What of the pain I have given and the joy I have felt,
Would you cry and laugh?
What of the men and woman I have picture in bed with me,
Would you be aroused?
What of the sounds I drown the world out with,
Would you too close your eyes?

Would you read me if I were a book?
If I was sitting on the ground just three pages long?
What wonders might you find in me?

Feel the push and pull of my voice as it enters a dance of love,
Affirmation follows with a glance caught wandering,
Linger just long enough for reality to catch up,
Sift through the maps of our brains  plotting each next step,
Expanding horizons form through a windshield as the sun sets,

Hear the tapping of hearts trying to synchronize,
Open to the restrictions unfurling before our eyes,
Place the next arrow to be released at the heart an inch higher,
Exhausted by each false hope formulated among our thoughts.

I wait in a line that seems endless
I look ahead only to see that the others are doing the same
The ground beneath my feet is marble, white with a blue shimmer,
Above me resembles that of a wood celling in a log cabin,
Behind me I meet the eyes of another waiter,
He quickly stands straight only to reveal another pair of eyes behind him,
There is a sound un recognizable in the distance and the line moves,
Though only a step, a sigh of relief, for there is much distance to travel,
The light comes and goes, with no observable source of light,
Looking right I see another step out of line,
Standing taller then the rest he heads my direction,
I ask as he passes "what do you see ahead of this line?"
He stares blankly then looks over the heads,
"Do you want the truth?" he asks,
I nod noticing that my personal space has grown smaller,
He points forwards then backwards and says,
"That is where you are going, and that is where you've been,"
"So at some point you'll reach where you're going?"
My space bubble expands with a hushed whimper,
It comes to mind that I should ask him one more question,
"Where are you headed then?"
He smiles, his teeth almost all gone,
"Why wait to know what I already can see"
"I plan to skip this line and find a new one on my own"
He waves as we part his tall figure an outline in the distance,
The line moves though I find myself still standing,
I am tapped on the shoulder and hear "May i skip you?"
I step aside no longer compliant with staying in line.

I found you lost and alone,
Your tear lines marked your dirt covered face
Your fear and hate
Your confusion and your relief
I carried you,
Through the fires
Through the falling glass
Through your friends and mine
I spoke to you,
Of better times
Of future times
Of now
I Failed you,
Rest now
Feel free now
No more pain
I will join you soon