music plays in my ears
my thoughts are laced with the rhythm
and lyrics
while my physical body is at a standstill
with my mind
and my heart
i cannot render anything
nothing makes sense anymore
without this particular person
even though i’ve lost this person long ago
i foster the craving of their presence
lost i am
lost.

every now & then
my mind is sprinkled with powder dust
i can barely make out...tell apart
reality from
fantasy
it all seems too much
thinking hurts
feelings misguided
goals unreached
during this period of time
i slip through the cracks of roads
- i twist and turn with every move -
that lead ordinary people to success

“if you want something very badly,
set it free.
if it comes back to you,
it is yours forever.
if it doesn’t,
it was never yours to begin with.”
this is all because
everything happens for a reason

you ever wish you could click erase
press restart
to help yourself
move forward in life
without feeling like you’ve left something
far behind you
but to live in the past
is to never experience the present
even with all the opportunities in the world
i would trade
myself
in exchange for being nonexistent
never mentioned
never accepted.

i beg of the presence
high above everyone
to lift me up
take me instead of the one
who doesn’t deserve to be taken away.

every now & then
i can’t explain why
i feel like reaching out
to someone i’ve outgrown.
throughout the years
i never thought to see you again
as i lay under the stars
the moon shines a special light onto me
for once in my life
everything looks and feels clear
your face paces back & forth in the back of my mind
but i toss it to the side
what we could...
could not.
get lost in the thought of you
wxnderlust

busy contemplating
when one should be taking responsibility,
accountability for what has been said
and done.
with you,
i am me
i throw away all of my mistakes
worries, doubts, regrets
when i think of you
i stop everything
to sit and reminisce
your handsome face
the warmth of your body
something i held close to me, at some point
i wish i would’ve
cupped your face
pull you into me
and feel your rosy lips
brush up against mine.
i would trade the world
for another day
just me and you
facing each other
we would take a deep breath
and let the words escape
after all is said
and done
we will embrace each other
cling onto each other
like a magnet would
or like an innocent child,
holding onto momma’s hand.