the words used to flow like silk through my fingertips
i used to know exactly how to weave them
make them fall into tapestries, hang them from walls
emblazoned with unadulterated innocence.

it wasn't until you asked to look at my creations
that i realised sunlight could be so damaging
my words felt frivolous under your scathing gaze
and they stuttered, crumbled. my tapestries fell.

now they're dust and i'm on my knees, crawling
grasping fistfuls that seep through my hands
you can't write about something you can't feel
and now i can't feel anything.

this is the last poem i'll write about you.

a momentary lapse of thought:
staccato thuds sounded by a hollow heart
upon the realisation that the clarity of 'best friends'
becomes muddled
and confused with the passing of time.

hearts become restless:
heads are filled with shinier thoughts
as the people once loved are replaced. we recreate ourselves
worlds away
from the ones to whom we once gave our soul.

the silence of an evening punctuated
by memories of our faded selves
they watch us as we blindly dance
to the symphony of their sighs.

he loves me
and i see it in his eyes
i see it when he pushes my hair back to kiss my neck
and it terrifies me

he knows me
and i hear it in his voice
when he laughs and calls me ridiculous when i collapse
in ticklish mirth beneath his touch

he adores me
and wouldn't hurt me for the world
i know it when he tells me i could never let him down
and i tremble under the weight of his words

If you think her kisses mean she wants you
she doesn't.
If you think it's going to work out with her
I don't.
If you think her heart is pure and simple
it isn't.
And if you think I'm going to wait for you
I won't.

We fell apart
When the lights dimmed with your smile
And acid tears burnt eyes to swollen slits
You punctured truths of glass into my heart
And we fell apart.

it's becoming easier
to hear your name and feel nothing.
Head and Heart fought a battle that only ended
when the Heart swelled with a Love that hurt to hold,
until the Head's gentle reminder
that this was not Love,
it was Pain.
blinding Pain.
but like all blows to the body and mind
Time crushes Pain into a dull ache, a numbness remaining
long in the Heart after the feeling has gone.
but the Head holds the knowledge that this was not Love.
it was Pain.
blinding Pain.
and it's becoming easier.