... and i felt you tighten the noose around my neck
and i felt you push the chair from under my legs.

when i was with you were an _
i wouldnt call it a relationship
because there was no relation
although there was a ship
but you were on the bow with your arms out
and i was an anchor waiting to be dropped

It all started with you telling me to close my eyes and that you have a little surprise for me.

We were laying in your bed with dim lights on and you grabbed my face and kissed me yet i kept my eyes closed because if i opened them ******* i would've seen the mistake i made and it would've dragged me into a self made hell i made in my imagination that was leaded by you

yet that hell would've been the only place where i felt comfortable so i opened my eyes and kissed you back to know what kissing a snake felt like

sometimes when i look at you i get chills down my body knowing that i love you but i wish i didnt

when i kissed you i closed my eyes wondering if what we had or would have one day is real

when i kiss your lips i start trembling but **** i cant help but kiss you

when i was at home alone you texted me

"hey im on my way to your house lets drive around"

we drove around talking about how big the universe is and how we're not alone and blah blah blah

then i was silent for about 20 seconds and you parked your car downtown and no one was around and you looked me in the eye and said "i love you"

i looked at you while you looked at me and said i love you too

and in my head i thought i wish i didnt

it was a week or two later we were driving to a restaurant and we held hands as you drove and your car went out of control and went off the bridge

i woke up a day later in a hospital bed with you in the bed next to mine but when i called your name something seemed a miss

your body was covered except for your hand which was hanging on the side and when i held it you were cold and i found out i was the only one who survived

at your funeral i laid a rose on your casket and told you i loved you but i wished i didnt

I was cleaning my room and i found a small box with a poorly carved heart

in it were polaroids we took and a note you left me the night you left a year ago

and i began to wonder why did i keep the note

why did i keep the only reminder i have of the night i lost everything

"its not you its me" how ******* cliche

when i finished reading i felt as if i had been punched in the gut

there was just a deafening silence  

3 months later i walk into the coffee shop downtown and im in the sitting area writing stupid poems and i hear a sweet and soothing voice and i glance over and the girl in the apron behind the counter has completely blown me away

i look for like 6 seconds and she looks so i look away in an instant

i come back the next day and maybe this day ill have the courage to ask her out

or just buy a coffee and not have the guts to have a conversation with her

im in the sitting area once more and i walk to the counter and ask for a frappe and you make it for me i thank you and i walk away, there goes all my courage

the cartoon devil and angel on my shoulder climb into my brain fighting over what i should do

eventually the angel won

luckily youre on break

i walk up to you and tell you my name and you tell me yours and after 10 minutes of getting to know one another i ask you out on a date and as anxiety wraps his hand around my throat you say yes and he loosens it

we plan a date for saturday night

i drive to your house and on the way on the highway a car flipped over with ambulances on the scene i hope the driver is okay

i pull into your driveway and i go to your door and you open it as im about to knock and ******* you look so beautiful

we go to a restaurant of your choosing that ive never been to before and we talk about our childhood, and our current lives and i pay for the check and we head out

we still have time to spare so i ask if you wanna go stargazing and you happily agree

we drive up and luckily no one else is around i turn on the radio and we lay on the hood of the car and this turns into a daily thing for after our dates

a month later we're happily together as a couple and  your family loves me and my family loves you and i stop by the coffee shop everyday to say hi and grab a cup of coffee

but forward to 7 months later as things went downhill

we were living together

you barely looked at me anymore

you never wanted to go on dates or stargazing

you were never in the shop when i came in as if you were hiding from me

i walked into my room and there was a note from you

you were leaving me

a year later I was cleaning my room and i found a small box with a poorly carved heart

in it were polaroids we took and a note you left me the night i found your note a year ago

and i began to wonder why did i keep the note

why did i keep the only reminder i have of the night i lost everything

"its not you its me" how ******* cliche

We are way more than our verses
and rhyme schemes

not everything is as artistic as it seems