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THEY SAY*
they want to be different, greater
don't they realize to their own words they're a traitor?

THEY SAY
they're a debator, educator, investigator, negotiator
but how?
how can they be so different when they all say the same things?
how can they be so ignorantly hypocritical?

love everyone* they say whist full of hatred
hang out with your friends they say when alone in bed
you never talk to me they say although they've never tried
go outside they say from deep inside
get off your phone they say while on the computer
just be nice they say when they're actually a persecutor

THEY SAY
so much and do so little
want to become more while becoming less
they guess it's a success when they oppress
but it's just a mess

THEY SAY
things they should be saying to themselves to us
but we are all people too, not slaves to command or objects to discuss

THEY SAY
this and that and everything
but I say

N O T H I N G

for it is better to say nothing at all than to participate in the
parade of puppets who profusely preach phony phrases.
I'd rather remain silent than take part in this cacophonous,
hypocritical, ignorant, perfunctory mess that we call
*s o c i e t y.
I want to say something, anything
                     but I'm terrified of what they'll think
                     of me. about to say it, I'm on the brink,
                     but no. the oppurtunity's gone before I can blink.
                     I want to talk, but my fears will not shrink.
I want to have a conversation
                     but it seems to always end in deadlock.
                     I don't know what's wrong but we can't talk.
                     conversations should make you forget the clock,
                     but all the "what's up?"s are as dull as a rock.
I want to talk, just for once*
                     but the art of talking must just be lost,
                     for nowadays talking is exhaust-
                     ing. everything is so crisis-crossed.
                     true conversation avoided at any cost.
menial matters matter
superior subjects scatter
                     good conversation is essential
                     almost everyone has the potential
                                          *so

        ­                                        just
                  ­                                       talk
                                                          ­        *!
the lonely boat, out at sea

seen by all, known by few

wondering how this could be

even though deep down it knew

floating around all day and night
going near shore but not close enough

it looks content but’s really not alright

always missing good company, life is tough

but it keeps going, this lonely boat

far out in the ocean or close to the sand

continuing for now this solo journey afloat
knowing one day it’ll find the place to land
I walk into the room,
feel the impending doom.

take a deep breath, swallow the fear,
and make myself appear full of cheer.

'don't let anyone notice me'
becomes a constant inner plea.

but when no one does anything,
I realize that I was lying.

I feel so much frustration
because I also need validation.
the deed is done
the war's lost and won
all is now fine
in this little land of mine
insight into the deepest and darkest corners of the mind
necessary to know one's true inner working
people who once seemed all the same now appear one of a kind
discover the hidden parts of yourself that are are always lurking
poetry is the best way to truly know someone you'll ever find
highlights the remaining sparks of humanity
starts conversation while bringing out insanity
lets us feel free
since the real beauty
is the responsibilities' reduction
and the consequences' destruction
stranded on a deserted island
in a sea of people
no way to escape the grasp of reality
not even within my mind

never knowing if the sea is constantly watching me
or oblivious to my every move

I know I'm constantly watching it
wanting to be immersed in belonging
but not sure how
I'm still an outcast

maybe, just maybe, there are other islanders
dispersed throughout this vast ocean
but I may never know
since I can't leave my place alive
left only with a sliver of hope
that once day two islands can come together
and live harmoniously
i walk among the living
but do not quite belong
no, i am not dead
i'm simply hardly alive

i get by every day
going through the motions
not feeling many emotions
without the interactions
that others are so accustomed to

i feel so lost
so alone
missing out on life
and i wonder why

**why can everyone live but me?
observing from afar
            but not too close for fear of my entire
            whole world crashing to nothing

listening to how things are
            but never saying anything because in the
            grand scheme of things, i know nothing

seeing others' happiness
            but feeling nothing myself, for
            to me, everything is nothing

smelling in the air success
            *but never having a taste of my
            own since i do and am nothing
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