i always feel invalidated and robbed
of the comfort of knowing that
i'd choose that ultimatum if it was ever a choice
but without that i have nothing
to fall on except knowing
that i have to endure and that is the
only ultimatum

If only you knew
About how much pain I went through
Just to make you smile
Every once and a while

If only you knew
How much I wanted to leave
This desolate land but didn't
Because of you

If only you knew
About the noose manufactured
Out of every fiber in my heart
That gracefully swung

If only you knew
How much I loved you
Because you can't love yourself
Until you've loved somebody else

If only you knew
How much I miss you
Since you've gone off
With some other guy

If only you knew
That the heart-fiber noose
Wasn't meant to be alone
It needed someone too

If only you knew
How gracefully it swung
wrapped around
my neck

If only you knew**
That you were the only
One that could
Save *me

Sometimes when I'm driving
and I'm alone
I say out loud
"I wish I was dead"
without thinking about it

How could I be so selfish
As to take my own life
I didn't think anyone would miss me
But it's clear now
I've got an angel
He's not quite here
But I'm happy
Because he won't let me
Disappear

you found her
lost and insecure
her pale skin shimmering
just laying there

just a moment to late
whyd you have to wait
to find her
the clock just stopped
the tears just dried

you dont know why
you cant keep your eyes off her
you dont know where to go from here
cause it was you and her
for always and after
but just a moment to late
why did you have to wait

everything she did was beautiful
every smile glowed
every laugh warmed your soul
everything about her was perfection

whyd you have to wait
you were a moment to late
you cant keep your eyes off of her

you cant move
scared to miss the lies
hoping this is a dream
hoping to break the ties

whyd you have to wait
you were here a moment to late
starring at her body
laying on the floor
full of sorrow
why did you not listen for the screams
how could you not hear the sobs

nothings forever
except when you look at her
you cant take your eyes off her
you know once you do
it will be the last time you see her.

Just then does the pain take over.
As you fall to your knees.