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 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
Your love,
Is the surreal of all,
Make me wonder if I'm high,
Or is it making me fall?

Hush! Don't spill -
The words in your mouth,
In your world, the Sun rises from North,
Sets in South,

It's been so long since you left,
I've already died through the sweater weather,
If you ask me how have I been,
I'ld say,  Never been better

I shall think of you -unapologetically
Even when I die,
My bones will remain,
And the silence will make you cry
 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
You came,
After all those awful years,
Sat beside my grave -nothing's the same

You never apologised,
Broke my heart,
Didn't even call to rationalise,

Today, I don't have a voice to speak,
I am gone in the dark,
While your affair with her is on fleek,

You're here and I wonder,
How you abandoned my love,
Threw me out and I surrendered,

I don't want to change your mind,
Leave while you can,
It's time to put the past behind,

They say, "You can't bring back the dead."
So forget about me as you shall,
Toss my memory out of your head
 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
It starts with a stare
Not calling back -pretending at first
Then actually never care

Walk a thousand streets,
But that bridge is burning -I can see
And I'm not the one scorching in heat

Smile so much that it hurts
Not to please you this time
Glad I learnt to put myself first

This beautiful, dazzling night
Just to spend alone -be on my own
Relieved -I've got nothing to fight

Shook hands with "kind",
Cleansed up my head -a new person there is
And now I can speak of my mind

This -the art of hate
Squeezing my brain -till all ekes out
I'm learning ,hope I'm not too late?
 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
Crazy to see
How many wish to die
Just to know
How many will miss them or cry

I do not need death
To show me if I'm needed
I disappear for a night
And my conscience is defeated

Funny what time can do
Bury us down
Pull us up
To make us feel lost and found

Been told I'm weak
Left after coming too close
Once or twice
Or maybe a hundred times

How is it that I'm still standing here?
All naked so you would see
The scars that won't heal
Someone that's just not me..
 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
Raw
 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
Raw
Hey
This is me
All naked in front of you

My scars are the battles
I lost many
But I won a few

What do you see?
When you look through me
Or to you, is it all blue?

I have craved your presence,
Like the sky needs the moon,
But do you have the slighest clue?

I've waited so you would say,
"I got you", for you could stay –
But none of it could ever be true
 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
It's really okay
If you don't plan to stay

I could go back
Lie down in my bed today

Have you ever starred at the midnight sky
Feeling as if it's pulling you out of a grave?

Why do we even expect?
For anyone to stick around anyway?

Maybe a month is enough
To say all that we want to say

Then we could go on with our lives,
Apart –no regrets, nothing to pay

After all, goodbyes should mean something
Only about joy —no tears, no hate
 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
I am not a victim
Of your broken glass
And I wonder how much more girls
You're going to harass

There's something
I want you to know
Pretty face and an ugly heart
Don't make a home

You spent days
Making me sure that I'm a sinner
But when they reward for the lies,
Honey, you're the winner

You like playing the "victim"
After bringing up the storm
You pulled me, twisted my arm
You meant no harm??

How easy is it for you
To be so disgusting?
All your filthy words
Are meaningless and rusting

In a way, I'm glad
That you're not mine
Who likes to keep wicked trash
Even for a dime?
 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
Those eyes
Those ****** eyes
As much as I hate to admit
They give me butterflies

If I could
I would want you to stop existing
I am feeling all these emotions
But I swear I'm resisting

You're not even the last thing I want
Not someone I would trust
I have to stop thinking
I know that I must

Isn't it crazy?
To fall for someone who looks like a heartbreak
But you make me want you
My mind goes numb, my hands shake

I guess it's okay
To think about you sometimes
Just to make myself satisfied
I tell my heart all these lies

I can see it in your eyes
The wilderness speaking for itself
The assurance that you can get anything
Like a game, without any help

I really want you to know
Not everyone is easy to buy
I don't care how pretty you are
If behind my smile, you can't hear me cry

You're fire –a beautiful fire
And I'm not ready to burn
I am more than what you see
But I notice, it's none of your concern
 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
Come closer, see what you want to see
Tonight we could just pretend
You can look at what a mess I am
For a while, you could be more than just a friend

You once said it takes courage to be who you are
And now I want to know what heaven feels like
You make me want to live more
Who cares what's wrong, what's right?


Give me your hand, feel my heart, will you?
I have been so broken and ugly
You realise that he tore my heart
Threw it away, but you want me out of my misery

You see underneath the fake game I play
From the ordinary girl to a self destructive soul
I am cold now –so cold and indifferent
And you say you want to be my home
 Jul 2020 Nayeli Rodriguez
Annie
I have a heart of stone
I love you but I'm not in love with you

I adore the way you stare
But I can't be yours, no matter what you do

I see desperation
I see more than what you show

We could have been lovers
But in a different time, with our high and lows

You and me
We could mean something together

I don't want to lie to you
But I want to be lonely forever

I have been looking around
For my life to have an impact

If I wasn't down for darkness
I could have worshipped you infact

Though —no matter where you go
You'll always be mine

Even if I am not keeping you
You're my Norse realm, all nine
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