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crystallaiz Oct 2021
i'd rather get drunk
to the sound of your voice
but here i am
listening to music
on the midnight train home
all the good nights
and sleep tights
can't mask the ending
that began when we met
it's been so long. i know the things that need to be done, but i just can't bring myself to do them
crystallaiz Nov 2019
i used to be a believer
in your eyes that held the stars in them
you used to be a believer
in my veins that blood pumped through

now you're withdrawing
i'm lying in this wasteland
wondering where the stars went.
my veins are a map,
leading you away from me
and i wish i could rearrange these lines
bring you back to me
i really did see the stars in your eyes and i would let you go if that meant you could keep the stars in your eyes. they were always meant to be in you. it was always meant to be you.
crystallaiz Aug 2019
it came out of nowhere
like the arrival of summer showers
the bicycle speeding round the corner
my favourite song playing on the radio
i wasn't prepared for you
the way i wasn't prepared to start anew
you're the scent of spring rain
morning coffee
you're my sweet death
and i'm not ready
i hope i'm not actually starting to like you ****. i don't think so. i can't be this terrible in choosing people to like.
crystallaiz May 2019
it's summer again
i met someone else
he'll become my summer
like you were my spring
in the clockwork seasons
we met and we loved
i used to fill pages with you
now i'm flipping the page
if i loved you
let it become a memory
i really like him now
crystallaiz Mar 2019
when you walk away
i'm still head over heels for you
still feel my heart skip a beat
still feel my stomach dropping out
like that time we went on the roller coaster
and i saw the skyscrapers upside down with you
i still feel the butterflies
still think about the what-ifs
still wonder what i did wrong
still think about you
but you're walking away
and i don't know how to go after you
it hurts. like really really really hurts and i don't know why it hurts so much. i can't do anything because i'm just thinking about you all the time and i want this to stop
crystallaiz Mar 2019
the walk to the beach is a long way
we pass by no one on the roads
the stars are a little forlorn
i look up at you but you don't look at me
we pass by an empty shopping cart
who left it there?
i push it along because it looks a little lonely
and it's not nice to be lonely at 4am
i know
you don't ask how  
but i wish you would
it's a very long way to the beach

when we get there
i'll still be empty
but i'll watch you turn golden
you, you were made for the sun
it's all empty inside now. don't know how to put anything in and don't know how to get anything out.
crystallaiz Oct 2017
jack-frost blue on snow white
circles of grey around midnight black
against the velvet night sky
the silent constellations
i fell
and fell
and fell

i bathed in your irises
but my feet couldn't reach the bottom
and when i tried to surface
the air was frigid
slicing my consciousness into ribbons
i took a breath
the chill seeped in
first it was my toes
then my legs
my stomach
my fingers
my arms
my chest

then you blinked
the ice fractured
and i
i shattered from the inside
i don't know. i had one of my moods again. haven't had one in a long time. it was not a good feeling.
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