All wording not overly conveyed,
              I'm no dictionary.

My pen is my shield and my words
             my armour.

Sometimes dented, ridiculed,
            so not as lustrous as your

vocabulary giving,

but every symbolism
          I give in jest.

I can be a clown, watch my words prance on
              the page in fruitful

colouring of metaphor.

But other times I'm in the size seven
of another's outlook not my own,
emotion grazing my subconscious.

         For that fraction of eternity I'm them, you
I live there fears,  hopes wishes that die after I put the
                                                                ­             pen down.

Don't judge a piece of paper that has nothing on it,
           for will have a doodle, a thought..

A drawing of emotion entwined within its fabric.

   But you just ridicule, turn the page not knowing
                     the pain or joyful happiness
that went to create this...

Yes its not in your taste, but its there's, mine.

Were just artists of our own little world,
             and if you happen to land here.

Please be green..


   Recycle what you think,
and be positive,
    really do reflect on what others foresee.

She was like a storm
               with no rain...

Just a tornado of destructive vocabulary.


Destroying every excuse
                               that I ever gave.

I was never a flood, never a river
               of ill equipped reasons.

Sometimes I just slipped on my
              own excuses.

I was the goldfish in her bowl
             of life..

And I had the memory of,
                yes darling ill do that.

But I shut the door and her wind
       became a breeze that never

dried in my thoughts..

My memory was a goldfish
        out of water only interested

In breathing.

But no matter what,she'll never
rain down.she'll just dry me off
         and sometime I remember,

and kisses are rained down instead
      of huricane vocabulary..

We dropping it low before
            it became came trendy..

We flying higher than any man
                  could shot us low

below..

We never lost control,  lights below

                                about to be dimmed


Dropping our attitude,  
                   we showed

that we could drop it harder

than any man an then some more.

Flying with our crew we were the angels
               dropping our vengeance below.

No one was safe when we flew,
    we were angles of death, of life.

We flew when others couldnt.

Our names were avenging beauties,
          and we kissed all below

with the fire of kisses falling from above.

If words could weep,  
           mine would be rivers

And the sentences would be
           a deluge on my

emotions.

We all drown,
but its our choice
   which tide we try to

fight against.

How will we drown...

How come life is
               life being high..

But im sober,

I'm tripping off the  news yet


         the last acid I dropped was in 2005.

What the,
       this is like a Simpson rerun,
       but this defamatory
distortion is a live reality.

   I tried to drink my self sober,
            but they wouldn't serve me as I
was under 55....

            I need to outrun this moment
but obese cos all this information is to
               many calories and I still sit here


quietly,
                  and hope this is just another
                                    live re-run....

In a room full of I's


        There was only one you.

I dream
of possibilities
      and not the
             probability.
                Call me crazy but
            I believe wishes
    come true with the
         click of my fingers
             and the flicker
               of my tongue.

the phone rings in the middle of the night, it's not my father, he doesn't even know what i look like
to have love reciprocated, that's all i really want
abandonment seems like a sweet gesture at this point
i'm tired of threatening and being threatened
i wish someone would just follow through
but then again,
who am i to speak?
endless days in the emergency room,
countless attempts,
no resolve.
no one cares.
when did that happen?
i try not to dwell on the past.
but is it dwelling if i can't tell the difference between 3 years ago and now?

Were suffocating ourselves
           with our own
              plastic bag of denial.



Let us recycle our outdated
                                 baggage
and carry it another way.

i'm going to die
that part is inevitable
you aren't going to miss me
i wish that part was avoidable
but chances are
when i gasp for one last breath
you'll be somewhere laughing
while my spirit releases into the air
like one of those balloons that kids only love for 5 minutes