MY UNCLE
You werent related by blood
But related by love
You made me laugh
But now youre making me cry
You left your life
Hanging on that rope last night
Im holding back these tears
Not wanting to get red blotchy patches
I dont want my sisters to see
because they dont like you very much
Because of some of the silly things you have done
Shut in my room
Thinking about the times
WE would be play fighting
You would pin me to the ground
Tickle me until I was in pain from laughing so much
i rememeber
When it was hot
The sun shining bright
You would get smart at me
And I would be smart back
You would pick me up
And throw me in the pool
I would try splash you
But fail
the time it was the night before christmas
And you came home from shopping late for your children
And got me to help wrap the girts
We woke
Not expecting anything form you
But you got us gorgeous earrings
I know it was little
But it meant alot
And IM holding back
Not letting these water warks
Fall from my eyes
Uncle
I miss you
And I know youve done bad
BUt youve done good too
Protected my mum
Had everyones bacl
Helped others out
Raised to little boys
But they now have to live with their mother
She wont look after them
Not the best home
But its their mother
But uncle
I love you
No matter what
I hope your having fun now
Happy
Watching your boys
Watching everyone
We love you

My tears stream
Down my face
As I think
Of how easily I can be replaced

My hands are trembling
Holding the blade
Is this worth
All of the scars I’ve made?

Then I remember
The people who taument me
Like Im emotionless
Just rid me of my glee

Every word you yelled
Every shove in the halls
Until Im crying
In the bathroom stalls

No one notices
They never will
All the pain you’ve caused
That I can’t ****

Then they wonder
Why Im dead on the ground
With my knife in my hand
And a note with blood all around

They are confused
Wondering why
Then they will all forget
And turn a blind eye

I’m all forgotten
Just like I new I would be

One who does not give questions
will not receive answers

Emotions like turbulent seas
I am standing before you
I am so small
My heart shatters like fragile glass
I hear your words
I am so small
Your words cut me like icy wind on my face
My feet fail to budge as if in cement casts
I am so small
My mouth opens but no words come out
I am silenced by fear
I am so small
A million little pieces I am rendered as you go away
I am so so small.

Hello everyone,

  I'm so very sorry … I feel horrible doing this, but I have no choice. You see, I have published my first book on Amazon/Kindle! This piece (and many others) had to be taken down because they do not allow published material to be available online for free. (Go figure) I wanted to leave the shell of the posts because I felt compelled to leave all your helpful and loving comments. (Silly sentimental, I know), but I also didn't want to just have the pieces disappear without an explanation. I feel bad enough as it is!

  I owe ALL of you so, SO much for all of your reads, love, and support. It was YOU that gave me the gumption to FINALLY get off my **** and publish! Thank you all for the warm comments, camaraderie, and encouragement! I will still be here, reading, uploading and just being the Rascal that I am. How could I EVER leave you guys?

  The book is called “The Way I See It – FictionPhilosophySoul Food” and it will be FREE for the first few days on Kindle Select, so watch for it, if you are interested. I hope that you go and grab it. If you do, I would also hope that you find it worthy, you would leave me a good review. That will help me get in the public eye! Soon afterward (2-3 days or so), it will be available in paperback.

Find the book(s) here: www.amazon.com/author/jeff.gaines

Or find the book(s), and all about me, here: www.JeffGaines.world

  Soon after, I also hope to have my first novel (a supernatural thriller), called “Wanderer” available as well!

  Wish me luck!

                                Big, Biggest Love,

                                               Jeff Gaines