I foster a monster
Of my own creating;
"Self-defeating" he slithers
As his skin festers into smiling,
Unrelenting and repeating;

So I slit my throat
With the cold knife of self-loathing,
Coating my skin
With a red dress
Of the life I've been wasting.

you say you're hurt
yet, you keep on cutting

you say you're isolated
yet, you keep building walls

you say they hate you
yet, you've already killed them all in your head

you say they don't understand
yet, you show no signs

you say you want to change
yet, you do nothing about it

you say you'll go far away
yet, you don't know it is always like this

you say you'll be an artist
yet, you only paint in red

you say you can't wait to live
yet, you're already dead

Your eyes
are dark and
dull...

I could've
sworn they
were bright blue
when we
first
met.