I fell like the rain on a stormy day
I dried back up when the sun shined again
Just to have a beautiful magnolia bloom once again

These last few months left a bad taste in my mouth;
The bad taste of dagger flavoured alcohol,
Of too much ****, cough syrup and coke.

This month left me empty and broke,
I want to choke out the truth to you but some things are too painful to speak--

I never imagined something so painful wouldn't bleed.

I remember sitting on the dock
in the summer.
The sky was too deep for stars.
Gentle lightning struck the mountains beyond
the lake, shadowing
out every stress of my existence
with pure energy.
I have no wisdom from those moments.
I remember only the peace of floating idly.

There was no need for thunder.
There was no need for rippling in the water.
There was no need for the distant calls of the loons.
There was only the simple silence
and my brain’s imagination of the chaotic show
that may or may not come.

The world outside me had fallen into
an infinite vastness
between each distant fractal of light.

I am not a religious person.
I don’t believe in God,
and I think divinity is subjective.

But I’ve always believed in the entropy of nature
as it delicately chooses leaves
to twirl in a pending storm
like a quantum fate.

"How did you meet her?" someone asked.
At the first moment, her face crosses in her mind almost immediately.
Smiling with a dazzling crescent moon eyes.
Her pretty little hands reached out to hold mine.
Sending shivers through my vine.
A mixtape which song has long forgotten played.
Almost everything at all once recalling the bittersweet memories.

Like an open door, she knows what she thought was.
The breeze once again set her in solitude.
It was all nothing without her.
Her fingers dance at the chanting of the birds.
"She is the sole star I orbit around" he said.
"She is an ocean— deep, calm, full of waves and tides, whom I wished I can embrace in my two arms."*
With that, the loosely hanging clock stop ticking.
His gaze lowered and his lips trembling as he speaks nothing.
He knows, it was nothing at the very beginning.

There are days
that I have
where I don't
want to face,
chewing,
or doing,
or running
the race.
I just want
to lay here,
head lost
in space,
but reality
comes laughing
reminding me
there's no escape,
so I tell myself
get up,
start moving,
you're being
such a waste.

For years I searched
And searched
For the Light
Only to realize
I am the Sun,
And I don't need a lantern
To bring me out of the dark,
I just need
To shine brighter.

When you look at me
with a shaking head
Making me feel like
I am an Idiot

And as sometimes mist seems
to cover the whole dam earth
Foggy mind plodding
through the earth

Lost in a tiny little boat
Floating  across a giant sea
Waves are so much bigger
than me

The darkest night seems to have no end
No guiding stars or
even an owls
hoot

Just swallowed up by some dark mystery
Full of doubt about
The direction
I took

With a million voices screaming in my head
Telling me that I am stupid
That I just got it so
So wrong

But wait white doves are now appearing
The flood is disappearing
As the phoenix is now
Rising

Misty due is now falling breaking clouds
Sky is clearing and
Birds are
singing

Flashing lights lit up in the mud
Words written in the sand
I think I have seen
a sign

Truth is I got everything
I ever really wanted
Exactly what
I needed

A person you would always be friends with
Something really terrific
I got
Me

Which is better than expected
Much more lovely than
I could of
imagined

You see this world is something special
And mankind can be so
Wonderful

As crystal cliffs sparkling with
pink waterfalls splashing
My heart meeting this
magical world

As I know all is how it should be
Exactly what was meant to be
And more importantly
So am I  

And so much better than expected
And I know now there
Is even
More

I was born with glass in my veins

Let the shards out through slits in the wrist

But somehow a few found its way to my heart

With equal part pain and equal part promise

To bring me an end in the most colorful of fashions

A rush of bright red out the chest

And a flush of pale white in my face

I wondered what it was like to love

But then again, I guess I always knew