she is wrapped in the most beautiful linen

white silks

moonlit satin

a soft figure enveloped by their beauty

delicate hands

groomed fingernails

dark eyes

wet hearts

her power takes my breath away

i look up and


she is no longer a pseudonym

she is only the moon

i finally let you go

.
i want to start believing that i am mine
i want to own every bit of myself
all of the parts i deemed ugly,
ungraceful,
meant to please others,
i want to wrap them all
in the softest cotton
and give them a new home,
one i can live in too

.
You have always been the one for me

since the day we met i’ve always thought that we would end up together

i thought that in some crazy coincidence You would look at me one day and see the world

that maybe You would make an exception just for me

that maybe best friends isn’t all we’ll be

but now it’s been 4 years

3 boyfriends

and 0 confessions

now, i know You could never love me

but

in the back of my head

i cant help but imagine a universe where we could’ve fallen as two

instead of one

.
i cut my hair instead of myself
i refuse to go back to that

.
flowers bloom in our heart
i bloom eternal tulips
but in You, only periwinkles can grow

.
i am not Yours
You are not mine
we can never be together, enveloped in the soft warmth of each other.
You will never hear the music that sings me to sleep in place of You.
the serene morning lights will never shine on us as we slowly shift awake, still intertwined