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Hanzou 1d
They gathered around her when I let go,
Her hopeless heart, saved by those she now knows.
Grateful, she smiles at the one who's near,
A friend of a year, erasing my years.

I see her turn to him, the boy I once feared,
Confessing his heart while I disappear.
Seven long years, now shadows in vain,
While he holds the space I can’t reclaim.

I was her anchor through storms and despair,
But my presence now vanishes, thin as the air.
Jealousy burns, yet I stand here alone,
Watching her heal in a world I don’t own.

Useless, the love I gave, now a ghost,
She found in another what I valued most.
Seven years wasted, or so it feels—
Replaced by a bond that suddenly heals.
Hanzou May 2018
Bakit? Bakit nga ba laging sa tula?

Bakit sa lahat ng pagkakataon, ito'y ginagawa?

Bakit emosyon at damdami'y,  dito napunta?

Bakit hindi maibigkas, at sayo'y maipakita?

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Bakit sa bawat pagsulyap, sakit ang nadarama?

Bakit sa tuwing lalapitan, pagka-ilang ay nangunguna?

Bakit 'pag nakakasama, wala manlang saya?

Bakit 'pag nakakausap, may patlang na 'di mapuna?

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Bakit ganon, hindi saya ang nadarama?

Bakit ganon, walang ngiti na maipakita?

Bakit ganon, bawat kirot lumalala?

Bakit ganon, parang wala lang talaga?

  ------------------------------------------------------------­-----  

Bakit nga ba? Bakit laging ganito?

Bakit laging may hapdi, ang nararamdaman ko?

Bakit? Ako naman ay totoo?

Kaya pala, ako nga pala ay minsan ng naloko, at nabigo.
Hanzou Oct 20
He gave her everything, or so it seemed,
Love poured out like rivers in the quiet stream.
But now she only recalls the storms, the rain,
As if all he ever brought was pain.

He wonders if she sees the man he became,
Or if she’s blinded by the ghosts of blame.
Mistakes, he admits, he made his share,
Yet he changed, but she acts like he’s still there.

She tells the world of her heart’s disdain,
Of memories that still cause her pain.
But what of the moments he held her close,
Of the love that endured when she needed it most?

She paints him in shades of darkness and strife,
As if he never added light to her life.
All the wrongs she remembers, clear and stark,
But what of the times he mended her heart?

He forgave the wounds she left behind,
The scars she carved, the battles unkind.
But now she turns, with anger so deep,
And casts him away, into shadows she keeps.

Perhaps it’s easier for her to forget,
The love, the kindness, the times they met.
For all that remains in her mind’s twisted maze,
Is the version of him that she couldn’t erase.
Hanzou Jul 2019
Binibini, isang liham ang aking isinulat para sa iyo,
Maaari mo bang ibahagi sa akin ang kislap ng iyong kagandahan?
Marami ang nakakakita ng kagandahan ngunit, naipakita mo na ba ang kailaliman?
Sa isang kupas na imaheng namumuo sa aking isipan,
Higit pa ang kalawakan at kung maikukumpara ko sa mga tala sa kalangitan,
Iisa ang isinasaad ng iyong kagandahan. Yun ay ang kalungkutan.
Isang sulyap na tila ba wala ka ng ibang nanaisin pa, o hihilingin.
Ang paghahangad ay labis subalit sasapat sa nagkukulang kong damdamin.
Binibini, bakit nga ba namumuo sa'yong mata ang labis na kalungkutan?
Bakit tila, sa aking pananaw ay nagsasabi na ika'y pagod na?
Bakit ako ang nakakakita ng iyong paghihirap?
Binibini, sa kabila ng lahat ng iyon, nagagawa mo parin na magtiis?
Hanga ako sayo binibini.
Hindi lang paghanga ang aking nadarama.
Higit pa sa matatamis na salita.
Higit pa sa pagpaparamdam ko sa'yo.
Binibini, lubos akong nagmamahal sa iyo.
Maaari ba'ng ako naman ang pakinggan mo?
Na sana ay makarating sa'yo ang lahat ng hangad ko?
Hangad ko ang iyong kaligayahan.
Ngunit hindi ko maipapangako na sa bawat sandali ay naroroon ako para sa iyo.
Hindi ko maipapangako na hindi kita sasaktan.
Hindi ko maipapangako sa iyo na ang bawat alaala sa aking piling ay magiging espesyal.
Sapagkat sa likod ng matatamis na salita ay ang pagkukubli ng masamang hangarin.
Hangarin na ika'y saktan.
Hangarin na sa bawat pangakong binitawan ay walang matupad.
Hangarin na iwanan ka'ng nag-iisa.
At hangarin na mag-iiwan sa iyo ng bakas na magdudulot ng iyong pagkahina.
Hindi ko man maipangako na hindi ka saktan,
Ang aking saloobin sa iyo ay totoo at walang bahid ng kasamaan.
Hindi ko man magawang makapunta sa iyong tabi,
Nakasisiguro ako na makararating sa'yo ang aking alab na damdamin.
Hanzou Oct 21
I hope she finds the love she deserves,
A hand to hold when the world unnerves.
If someone else can give her peace,
Then maybe that’s where her heart can cease.

But deep inside, it breaks me still,
To know it won’t be me who fills
The spaces in her soul, once mine,
As she moves forward, leaving me behind.
unspoken words.
Hanzou Jun 2021
Every single time, it is always because of me.
I am the reason why it happens.
I am the one at fault.
Felt as if guilt-tripping.
Abnkkbsnplko pt. 4
Hanzou Oct 23
It hurts to know they think I used them, nothing more,
That I cared only for their bodies, and nothing at the core.
They never took the time to know the heart inside,
Now I wear the mask of a villain, with nowhere to hide.

I tried to show them who I was, deeper than the skin,
But all they see is someone playing a game to win.
They don’t see the care, the love I tried to give,
Now I’m just the one who took, while they relive.

I’m painted as the one who saw them as a toy,
As if I only sought to break, to use, and destroy.
But I am not that man, that’s not the truth I know,
I wanted something real, but they’ll never see it show.

Now I stand as the villain in their tainted view,
A stranger to the heart they never really knew.
I wish they’d look beyond the scars and what they claim,
To see the soul behind the name they chose to blame.
Hanzou May 2018
Can you save that person?
Or will you save that person?
Can you not let them hurt again?
Or will you not let them hurt again?

Can you make that person happy, one more time?
Or will you make that person happy, like it's the last time?
Can you give that person the feeling that they've been longing for?
Or will you let that person feel that, no matter what comes?

Can you consider their worthless self?
Or will you decide to accept it?
Can you also be the person that decides?
Or will you be the person that initiates?

Making them feel and having them feel are both different
It isn't a matter of questions or actions
It's in the willingness, of the mind, of the heart
Now, can you do it? Or will you do it?
Hanzou Jul 2019
tol kung ako tatanungin, pa'no masasabing eto na 'yon?
kase diba 'pag nagmamahal ka dapat nasa tamang panahon?
pa'no nga ba masasabing tama na 'yon?
mahal mo, mahal ka

tol kagaya rin noong una
pero 'di ka naiiba kase lahat ng 'yan sa umpisa talaga
pero 'pag nagtagal na tol dun na magsisimulang magbago
lahat ng kamustahan magbabago

lahat ng pag-iintindihan sa isa't-isa, maglalaho
lahat ng lambingan, o pangako, napapako
pero tol ano nga bang dahilan?
ang tanong, anong magiging dahilan?
Hanzou Jul 2019
I wish
I had you
Lying next to me
Doing the things we love
Sharing the things we would have
Talking to each other all the time
Wishing the distance in between us was short
Looking to each other, it was my only wish
I hope this distance would not make you forget me
I could see you in my dreams every night
It would be great if it was real
I could hear you from the phone
It seemed like it was surreal
That I met you personally
I talked to you
I held you
Almost, but
Temporarily.
Hanzou Apr 2021
Why does it feel like we're not the same as back then,
Like you're too far from me?
Should I keep reaching you and not hold back,
Or should I let you outrun the feelings that I have?
Hanzou Oct 19
We stood once, hand in hand,
against the world and its cruel demands.
We whispered vows, beneath the sky—
no storm would break us, no tear could pry.

We promised to fight, to always hold on,
yet now, it seems, that bond is gone.
You remembered the hurts, the weight of the past,
and forgiveness you spoke of was never to last.

But what of the love I gave in return?
The trust I rebuilt when it wasn’t my turn.
I held your flaws, your every mistake,
because for you, my heart would break and remake.

Do we have to say goodbye to dreams we once knew?
To a future we built, where love carried us through?
I loved you deeply, beyond every scar,
but now, you choose to drift afar.

Was it all for nothing, this love we embraced?
Do promises fade, like tears left erased?
Maybe goodbye is what you need to move on,
but a part of me wonders where we went wrong.

So, I stand here, torn and confused,
clutching a love that I never abused.
Perhaps the answer is letting you go,
but this heart—it's too slow to know.
Hanzou Nov 1
Each day, the quiet feels heavier and long, missing the chats that felt like a song.
Seven years spent talking from dawn till night, now silence fills where you brought light.
You rush to move on, leave it all in the past, while I’m stuck watching memories last,
Holding pieces that won’t let me be, haunted by echoes you can’t see.

Forgive me if I linger, scrolling through your trace, still tied to the warmth of your fading face,
Watching you find ways to let go, as I stay where our moments flow.
I see your posts, seeking love, seeking care, searching for something we used to share,
While I wonder if I did enough, or if I was never truly what you dreamed of.

Seven years, scattered like dust in the air, gone in a blink while I’m still there,
Tracing memories like lines in sand, wishing you'd reach back, to take my hand.
But I know you’re trying to start anew, letting go of all we once knew,
While I hold the weight of what we were, feeling like just a fading blur.

I want to speak, to tell you I care, to remind you of the love we shared there,
But I know reaching out would feel wrong, like trying to keep you where you don’t belong.
So here I am, with memories tight, holding onto pieces each day and night,
Watching you go, finding someone else’s light, while I fade into the shadowed night.
am I really not enough?
Hanzou Oct 23
Now I see her rebuilding, piece by piece,
The person I once loved, finding her own release.
She thinks of me as lustful, only caring for her skin,
But I watch her now, embracing the self she’s within.

Why couldn’t she see her worth when we were still entwined?
Why did it take my fall for her to free her mind?
But maybe that’s the way it’s meant to unfold,
Her growth born from the stories of me, cold.

If being the villain makes her stronger, that’s fine,
If in their eyes, I’m the reason she found her line.
Let me be the bad guy, if that’s the price to pay,
For her to rise and move forward, far away.

I’ll wear the mask they paint, with no defense or plea,
If it gives her the strength to be all she can be.
Let me be the villain, if that’s what it takes,
To see her rebuild, even if it’s on my mistakes.
I'll gladly accept whatever other people think of me.
Hanzou Oct 22
We ended like a storm that passed too fast,
Leaving nothing but silence in the aftermath.
The words we never spoke now hang in the air,
Like smoke from a flame that was never quite there.

Each day feels like a ship lost at sea,
Drifting farther from where we used to be.
Hope fades like the evening light,
And I fear she’ll never see me, even in the night.
Hanzou 5h
I was once fooled by you,
Your words, your promises
I handled it, said it was a thing of the past
I got through it

Then I got fooled again.
Twice.
By your words, your promises,
I let myself believe you.

I knew you weren't gonna change,
Not your past mistakes,
Not your past actions,
You're the same as you were,
Before.
Hanzou Jul 2019
Sensitibo akong tao, kaunting pangungutya, malaki na ang epekto.
Nabuhay ako sa paniniwalang lahat ng babae, tumitingin lang sa gwapo.
Kasalanan ko bang maging pangit? Siguro hindi, siguro oo.
Sabi nila walang pangit. Ugali lang ang pangit sa ibang tao.

Nakasanayan ko nalang na walang naririnig, kahit lantaran akong laitin.
Ininda lahat ng pananakit, maswerte nalang kung minsa'y daplisin.
Hindi ko kayang lumaban, patay malisya lang ang damdamin.
Ayoko ng gulo, ni isang salita wala akong binanggit kahit aking isipin.

Aking babaguhin, karamihan sa kababaihan ay tumitingin sa gwapo.
"Ano bang meron sa mga gwapo?" Pare-pareho lang naman kaming tao.
Alam kong mahalaga din ang panlabas na kaanyuan pero,
Yun ba ang minamahal? Yun nalang ba ang basehan sa mundong ito?

Lahat ng 'yan nakaraan nalang sa akin.
Magmula nung dumating ka, pinaniwala **** mali ang aking hangarin.
Hangarin na tanggapin na walang kaaya-aya sa akin.
Kahit anong pilit ko, pilit **** itinatanggi at hindi pinapansin.

Hindi ako gwapo. Pero kaya kong harapin ng may magandang kalooban ang magulang mo.
Hindi ako mayaman. Pero ipapakita ko sayo na ang kayamanan ay nasa kaya nating ibuo.
Hindi ako yung taong magara ang kasuotan kapag haharap sayo.
Aanhin ko yun? Kinabukasan natin ang aabangan ko, hindi pagiging maluho.

Hindi ako yung lalake na pagkakagastusan ka ng sobra sa tuwing may selebrasyon.
Gusto ko kase maramdaman natin. Hindi sa nakikita, kundi mismo sa pagkakataon.
Hindi ko kayang lumaban, duwag ako, at nananatiling mahinahon.
Pero hindi ko hahayaan na may umapi sayo na kahit sino, makakatikim sakin 'yon.

Hindi ako yung tipong kaya kang pakiligin sa mga salita.
Madalas kasi wala akong tiwala na kaya ko yun magawa.
Panay ang pagkumpara ng itsura ko sa iba.
Kahit ganun naman , lahat ng sinabi ko sayo, totoo at may isang salita.

Hindi ako gwapo, oo.
Hindi ako maporma, oo.
Hindi ako astig, oo.
Hindi ako yung matitipuhan agad kase, oo, ganito lang ako.
Hanzou Oct 2022
I hate you,
With all my life.
For the things you made me feel,
The things you made me do,
I hate you.
Hanzou Jul 2019
Have you ever felt being loved back?
Most of us have, but sometimes not
How is it? A feeling of fulfillment right?
It is, indeed, a justified feeling.

Have you ever felt being hurt by that person?
I know all of us will say, it's in it
How is it? Hurts deep right?
It is, indeed, a sorrowful fright.

We love the same person every single day
Without knowing how long can we last, all the way
Love is all about commitment and maturity,
Without that, you can't even love, completely.

Love is kind, and sometimes unfair
But, have you wondered why everyone in love, has a share?
A share of thoughts, experiences, and emotions
Love is good, that kept us all going on.
Hanzou Jul 2019
It was the first time that I met her
She was shy and quiet, pure and innocent
That day was the most memorable for me
It's like we've known each other for long
Like talked to each other for so long
Laughed at each other for so many reasons
Loved each other so hard
Over and over again, it's like a cycle
Vented frustrations at each other
Even to the point that will end our time being together
Happy times have ended so fast,
Each and every moment did not last,
Right doings became wrong, without having the time to ask.
I
Hanzou Mar 2021
I
Didn't only get jealous,
But also got the blame.
If
Hanzou Mar 2021
If
You only feel like it,
when you're told to.
Hanzou Sep 27
for a long time, i experienced everything with you
from sadness to laughter, being crazy too
will it hurt to wish for another chance to do?
will it be okay for us to start again anew?

i know, i know it all too well by now
those feelings of yours have long gone by
but how can i keep myself from tearing apart somehow
if since then you have stopped to try?

i guess this is goodbye
but i still don't want to
this feeling of wanting to keep it together is just an alibi
for the truth is, i never stopped loving you.
Hanzou Nov 10
Paano ako uusad kung sa bawat minuto hinahanap ko siya?
Sa bawat paglipas ng araw ang nasa isip ko ay siya?
Paano maghahanap ng iba kung sa pagtatapos namin ay nagpanggap lang ako na tanggap ko na?
Paano masasanay na wala nang kami sa panahong kuntento na?
Paano naging ako na lang ang dating ikaw at ako kung ang kapalit ng pagiging malaya ay kawalan ng aking ligaya?
Hanzou Nov 3
She drifts away, day by day, so slow,
While I’m bound to memories that won’t let go.
She’s healing, living, meeting someone new,
And I’m stuck in shadows, split in two.

She smiles again, while I hold on tight,
To faded moments, lost to the night.
Promises burst like bubbles in air,
Forgotten whispers, no longer there.

She moves with ease, and I fall behind,
Caught in the ties I can’t unwind.
Her world expands, while mine stands still,
Haunted by dreams I can’t fulfill.

So here I stay, as she walks free,
A memory chained, lost at sea.
She’s found her light, her life ahead,
While I’m left with words unsaid.
I didn't want our relationship to end, but clearly I am not the person you want to grow alongside with. The person you want to feel loved, needed, understood. I am clearly not the person you want anymore. You're trying to move on too fast, and that's cruel.
Hanzou Nov 10
It stings to see her move ahead,
New crushes filling the space I held,
Seven years, a blink, a fade—
A chapter closed, or so it’s spelled.

Was I just a phase, a stepping stone,
A lesson learned, now left alone?
Her heart moves on, her life unfolds,
While I stay stuck in stories old.
Hanzou Jul 2019
Hey, you've had enough right?
So why do you continue to fight?
Why do you seem helpless, on countless nights?
Why the light you had in you all this time, has lost its bright?

It's okay, life is fair
That is, for being unfair to all
You just need to provide yourself with care,
Eventually, you will sway from all your downfalls.
Hanzou Oct 19
In the quiet hours, your laughter lingers,
Echoes of memories dance on my mind’s stage.
Each shadow whispers of love’s tender fingers,
Yet here I stand, a heart caught in a cage.

Stars above witness the nights I still yearn,
For the warmth of your gaze that once felt like home.
In dreams, I reach out, but the tides never turn,
As I wander this world, forever alone.
Hanzou Jul 2019
Kahit na ano pang isipin ng lahat tungkol sa ating dalawa
Pangako ko sayo na hinding-hindi na magbabago pa
Ang natural na pag-ibig na nakatanim dito, oo dito
Pag-ibig na nagbibigay lakas sakin at sa buong pagkatao ko

Natatandaan mo ba? Lahat nang pagsuyo na aking ginawa
Lahat nang binigay sayo'y ginusto ko at ninais ng kusa
Hindi man ako tulad ng iba na may maipagmamalaki talaga
Pinilit ko pa ding maki-ayon at kayanin para makasama ka

Kung ano man ang nais na hilingin
Handa akong ito'y tanggapin
Kahit na magpakatanga sa lahat,
Ng pagkakatao'y aking gagawin

Kasi mahal kita, oo totoo na mahal kita
Totoong lahat ng ito para sayo, noon pa
Handa naman akong maghintay sa isang tabi
Hanggang sa dumating ang araw na handa kana binibini

Ikaw ang tanging lakas
Sandalang walang wagas
Para bang ako'y tinamaan ni kupido
Ang puso ko ay lagi ng ganado

Isipin man na ako ay nambobola
Isipin man lahat ng 'to sa umpisa
Isipin man na agad mabalewala
Isipin man na maloko sa salita

Hindi ko gagawin ang panloloko
Na ginawa sayo't pang-uuto
Mananatili lang akong nakagabay sayo
Handang pasanin pati lahat ng problema mo

Laging nakatitig sa maganda **** mga mata
Lahat ng pagod ay agad na nawawala
May mga bagay na madalas kuntento na
Pag nakikita ang iyong ngiti, na nakatutuwa

Patawad kung madalas ako'y madikit sayo
Patawad kung masyado akong makulit sayo
Pasensya na kung ganito ang nararamdaman ko
Masyadong halata, masyadong mainip kung magmahal ako

Salamat kahit wala kang ginagawa,
Dahil presensiya mo lang sa aki'y sapat na
Salamat sa pagtanggap at hindi pagtaboy sa akin
Salamat sa maliligayang sandali na palagi kong gugunitain

Nagdadalawang isip ka pa ba?
Seryoso ako, mahal na mahal kita
Hindi naman ako nagmamadali, alam kong nariyan ka
Mahal kita, at iyon ang isinasaad ng aking tula.
Hanzou May 2018
Minsan naiisip ko kung bakit madalas akong nag-aalala sayo.
Madalas din kung maramdaman ko na sa bawat minsan nasasaktan ako.
Minsan wala akong maramdaman.
Madalas nagiging manhid nalang.

Minsan ginugusto ko nalang na biglang mawala.
Madalas sinasabi ng isip ko na 'wag magpapabigla.
Minsan naman nakakasanayan ko na tiisin ang pagkalungkot.
Madalas hindi ko kinakaya, mahirap, matindi, makirot.

Minsan napapatanong ako kung, "Minsan lang, pero ba't napapadalas?".
Madalas na kase akong matulala kakatingin sa larawan nating kupas.
Minsan nasasagi sa isip ko, "Kuntento ka pa ba? O sawa ka na?".
Madalas akong natatakot, nababalisa, 'di mapakali, oo, sobra na.

Minsan ko nang nagawa ang ibalewala ang iba, walang nakikita, kahit nandyan na.
Madalas ko ding sinasabi sa sarili na wala akong alam noon, kahit 'di na tama.
Minsan naisip ko na baka bumalik sa'kin, at karmahin ako.
Madalas namang kinokontra ng isip ko, ang damdamin ko.

Oo nga pala, minsan na din akong nagloko.
At ngayon nararanasan ko, ang madalas na pinaggagagawa ko.
Kahit sabihin pa na minsan lang, kahit minsan lang na nangyari.
Madalas ko ng maranasan, minsan, madalas, bumabalik sa akin ang ginawa ko dati.
Hanzou Nov 10
All the things I did weren't enough
If the person I once knew
Tries to find those on others
It just means that
Even if I try to do better
If I'm not the person that is wanted
It's always never enough
Hanzou 7d
When there are no words to capture my regrets,
My longing, my anger—all the colors of emotion,
When the day arrives that my letters fade away,
And I lose the words, the sentences, the will to create.

The girl I once poured my words out for,
who was the heart behind every line, every verse—
she isn’t mine anymore.
Now these poems fall silent, with no one left to read them.
hindi ko kayang umibig muli.
Hanzou Jun 2019
Hindi ko maunawaan
Mga katagang napagdaanan
Na marahil totoo nga,
Walang personal na pangmatagalan.

Musika ang naagapay
Naapuhap ko kung saan nakalagay
Sa musika naging karamay
Pero sa kasalukuyan, siya ay sumakabilang-buhay.

Nawaglit man sa panahon
Pansamantala man ang pagkakataon,
Lahat mananatili sa memorya
At 'yun ang magsisilbing alaala.
Hanzou Jul 2019
Ang pag-ibig ay 'di naisusukat ng mga letra
Kung magbabakasakali lamang na ito'y makita
Kahit na may malayo, at posibleng may magbago
Ang pagibig ay nandyan, at nananatiling buo.

Ano nga ba ang pagibig kung hindi ka totoo?
Totoo sa bawat salita, at binitawang mga pangako?
Pangako na inilahad, ngunit laging napapako
Napapakong pagmamahalan, kailanma'y 'di na lalago.

Kapag sinabi mo bang "mahal kita",
Ay talagang sigurado ka na?
Totoo ba talaga lahat, ang iyong nadarama?
Tagos sa puso, matino, at sayo'y may pagkakilala?

Kung minsan ang pagibig, ay seryosong usapin
Hindi sapat ang salita at dapat hayaan ang damdamin
Hindi lamang sa isang tao, kundi sa bawat isa sa atin
Dahil ang pagibig ay turo ng Maykapal, sa kalooban natin.
Hanzou May 2018
Ikaw ba ay bigo sa pagibig?

Tipong lahat ay nadaan lang sa kilig?

Kahit sinong gusto ay 'di ka hilig?

Pagkabigong sa umpisa'y nagsimula sa titig?

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'Wag kang mag-alala.

Dahil hindi ka nag-iisa.

Madami kayong nagdurusa.

Mga sawi na parehas na pinaasa.

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Kumalma ka, pag-isipang mabuti.

Sa tingin mo kaya'y bakit ka nasawi?

Maling pagkakataon, pagtugon ng madali?

Pag-abante't pag-atras, nagpaka martir sa hapdi?

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Kung ika'y bigo ay 'wag **** dibdibin.

Sa ngayon, maraming bagay ang dapat isipin.

Ang tunay na pag-ibig ay 'di madaling hanapin.

Nasa puso't kaluluwa, ang magmahal na nasa saloobin.
Hanzou Jul 2019
Sa pagitan ng isang salamin kami'y unang nagkatagpo
Tila walang ibang nakikita habang tanaw siya sa malayo
Kaunting hakbang nalang ay patungo na ako
Ngunit napuno ng kaba at hiya, sapagkat unang beses ito.

Isang binibining marilag at may kaayusan
Na ang kaniyang kaanyuan ay kapita-pitagan
Malumanay niya akong tinungo at nilapitan
Na para bang kami ay mag-uusap ng masinsinan

Lumipas ang bawat sandali na kami ay magkasama
Habang dahan-dahang inilapat ang kamay sa kaniyang palad
Nilibot ang paligid, tanging siya lang ang nakikita
Mahinay ang takbo ng oras, na sa layo ng nilakbay ay parang nagpapahinga

Malapit na matapos ang panandaliang pagsasama
Habang ako'y pilit na tinalunton ang bawat hakbang niya
Dumating ang pagkakataong magpapaalam na
Lunos ang biglang nadama, sapagkat iyon ay una.

Sa larawan na aming kinuhanan nang kami ay magkasama
Ika-pitompu't anim na araw ng tatlong daan at animnapu't lima
Siya ay aking nakausap, nakasama, at nakita
Subalit hindi nasabihan ng isang mahalagang salita

Sa nag-iisang larawan na pilit kong iniingatan
Bumalik kami sa dati na sa telepono'y nag-uusap na lamang
Kung may pagkakataon ay agad siyang pupuntahan
At sa pagkakataong iyon, ay mahigpit siyang hahagkan

Sa isang imahe ng larawan na aking itinatangis
Nag-iisang larawan na lubos kong ninanais
Subalit sa kasalukuyan ako'y patuloy na nagahis
Sapagkat ang imaheng iyon ay imaheng puno ng hinagpis

Hinagpis sa una naming pagkikita
Sa matagal na paghihintay ay muli ng nagkasama
Handa akong maghintay at maglakbay ng ilang milya
Mangyari lamang ulit ang matagal ko ng adhika.
Hanzou 1d
Even after all those years
I got replaced
By someone
She just met
sana ako rin makahanap ng bago gaya ng kung gaano kabilis niyang makahanap sa kabila ng pitong taon na samahan.
Hanzou Apr 2021
I saw a daisy flower that grew under your eyes.
Each time you cry, they bloom too.
Should you let it grow? That flower that is once a seed?
Or let it turn into a daisy flower that makes you want to cede?
I thought it was charming, that flower.
You kept it growing, didn't let it wither.
There should be no reason for that flower,
To attract you to thither.
Your tears let it grow.
The seed you had in you.
Since then, no smile on your face had shown.
Hanzou Oct 21
They say I’m the storm that tore it apart,
The one who left ruins in someone’s heart.
No matter how clear the skies may seem,
They only recall the thunder and scream.

I’ve wandered far from those wild winds,
But the echoes of past mistakes still spin.
They look at me through shattered glass,
Seeing only the cracks of what couldn’t last.

In their eyes, I’m the fault, the fall,
The reason the walls crumbled tall.
No bridges left, just broken ground,
And no path back can ever be found.

But is it the storm or the earth below,
That crumbles first when the winds blow?
Maybe we’re both tangled in pride,
Both trying to claim who’s justified.

I’m the shadow they can’t forget,
The cause of a pain they won’t reset.
But deep inside, the truth’s unclear—
Who truly caused the fall, and who shed the tear?

So here I stand in the ruins we built,
Carrying the weight of unshaken guilt.
They see only the storm, never the calm,
In a tale where neither was truly wrong.
unspoken words.
Hanzou Oct 19
She once held my face like I was her world,
Now her words cut deep, like daggers unfurled.
She looks at me now with disdain in her eyes,
What was once treasured, now she despises.

I see stuff sometimes, each one like a blade,
Saying this situation makes her spirit fade.
Not from the place or somewhere, but from me, I know—
A reminder of the love she let go.

A person who sees me a disdain, needs to run far away,
That every corner of a place brings her dismay.
But it's not the streets, it’s what she can’t bear,
The ghost of who I was still hanging there.

I feel it all—the whispers, the weight,
The way a person rewrites love into hate.
That silence screams louder than any blow,
Crushing the heart that once made me glow.
Words left unspoken. This is a creation on a muddled mind.
Hanzou May 2018
That loneliness
Inside her shallow heart
Felt like a deep one
Almost empty, but left open.

I always admired her
Looked up to her flaws
Everything about her feels nostalgic
But there's this one feeling.

Her eyes are lively enough not to notice
Her smiles are even wider than you'd feel
Her face doesn't show that gloominess
That's exactly nobody knows.

Whenever I dig deeper knowing her
Even the darkness inside her
All those imperfections
Guilt, impurity, mortification

Her eyes are so full of life
But inside, it's like an empty vessel
Her heart, is a heart that keeps on loving
But in reality, it's a heart that is always hurting.
Hanzou Jul 2019
Hindi ko lubos malaman kung saan na nga ba ang daan tungo sa walang hanggang kasiyahan
Tila ako'y nabalot na ng walang katapusang kalungkutan
Pakisabi naman sa akin ang araw kung kailan ito mawawakasan
Patuloy na naghihinagpis
Mga mata ay laging nananangis
Kung iyong titingnan sa aking pisikal na kaanyuan malalaman mo ang pinagkaiba ng isang taong masaya at isang taong pilit nagpapakasaya.
Oo, hindi ako ang taong kilala ninyo.
Sa likod ng wangis na anyo,
Sa kabila ng 'di mawaring agam-agam,
Nananatili ang isang kabuuan ng pagkatao na kahit kailan, hindi ko ninais maramdaman.
Oo, isa akong halimuyak ng bulaklak sa inyong paningin pero,
Ni minsan hindi nagawang pitasin at nanatiling nakasulyap sa katimyasan.
Isa lamang akong atraksyon na pinipiling lapitan.
Isang anino sa pisikal na anyo.
Hanzou Oct 25
I know one day, someone else will take my place,
They’ll kiss those lips and feel her warm embrace.
They’ll hold her close, whisper words I used to say,
And share the secrets I once held, now washed away.

Someone new will take her hand, see her tender side,
The parts of her heart she used to let me inside.
I was once the one, her shelter and her calm,
But now I’m just a memory, fading in her palm.

Jealousy stirs, a quiet ache I can’t deny,
Thinking of her laughter shared with another girl or guy.
But it’s not my place, not my right to say,
I’m just the one who couldn’t let her drift away.

So here I stay, with shadows of what used to be,
Unable to move on, though she’s finally free.
She’ll find her peace, while I watch her from afar,
As someone else becomes her moon, her guiding star.
the man who can't be moved.
Hanzou Nov 1
Strange, isn’t it? How the boy I never thought to fear,
Now walks beside her, in whispers she holds dear.
A year they’ve known, yet closer they’ve grown—
While I drift alone, like a heart made of stone.

Seven years we wove with threads of care,
Built from laughs and tears and promises rare.
But he, in months, has somehow won a part,
That I spent years trying to hold in her heart.

She says his confession was light as air, just words—
But he remains, while my love fades unheard.
Best friends, she calls him, like an easy refrain,
While I smile, hiding the quiet, growing pain.

So here I am, a shadow of what we were,
In the life we planned, now a faded blur.
Watching him stand where I once stayed,
As I learn to let go, where I thought we’d be made.
I feel pathetic for being like this, even though we've long since broke up. I guess I am just a effed and wicked person.
Hanzou Oct 23
This is my last act of love, the final thread I’ll weave,
I’m sad I’m not the one for you, it’s hard to truly believe.
Seven years we shared, a time that shaped my soul,
A piece of you remains with me, forever keeping me whole.

If one day you find someone new, someone to make you bloom,
Someone who sees your light and clears away the gloom.
I hope they make you feel like you, the way you always should,
And give you all the love I couldn’t, but always wished I could.

I feel the weight of sadness now, for not being enough,
For failing to show the depth of my love when things got tough.
I couldn’t make you feel the way you deserved to feel,
And now I face the truth I can no longer conceal.

I’m not the one who’ll stand with you at the altar in the end,
I’m not the person you’ll call a lover or even a friend.
It hurts to think of all the moments we once knew,
The dreams of forever that we both outgrew.

Those dates we shared, the laughter and the nights,
All our bondings and the warmth of the morning lights.
They are now pieces of the past, but I’ll hold them tight,
For they’ll forever be a part of my memory’s light.

I’ll cherish those times, though they’ve come to an end,
The love we built, though broken, it’s a love I can’t pretend.
I’ll carry it with me, though it may fade with time,
A love that was real, even if it lost its rhyme.

This is my last act of love, the final gift I’ll give,
Letting you go, so you can truly live.
I hope you find the happiness that slipped away,
And feel loved in all the ways I couldn’t convey.

When I can finally move on, when the weight is gone,
I’ll look back on this love and see how far I’ve drawn.
I’ll be proud to say I loved with everything I had,
Even though we parted, I’ll remember the good and the bad.

I’ll remember you as the girl I loved with all my heart,
Though we’ve drifted, you’ll always be a part.
And when the ache subsides, when I’ve finally healed,
I’ll know that my love was true, even if it wasn’t sealed.

So here’s my final act, my farewell to the past,
I hope your new love will be one that lasts.
I’ll carry the memories, but I’ll let you be free,
This is my last act of love—for you, for me.
Farewell, my love.
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