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Xant Oct 5
I was never born to be a hero
and to you, or by you, I'm not obliged
Cause I've no healing power bestowed,
no superman strength nor laser eyes

In fact,
my bones are twigs,
my flesh jelly
My mind's been rigged,
I need no more burden to carry

And I've fulfilled no expectations of yours
I'm not even trying to anymore
Cause I am not here to save the day
So keep your wrathful sorrow to yourself
When leaving a toxic relationship, half of me felt a big deal of guilt.
And the other half of me, felt like I deserved to be selfish for once.
I deserve to grow, I deserve to love myself before I
could love somebody else.
I can't fix a broken person,
if I am broken myself
Such a selfish being I am

-5/10/2019-
Xant Sep 20
As the lights went dim
I found myself adrift
into an altered reality

And that's about
the furthest I can get,
away from this harsh
substantiality
How I feel when the stores are closing for the day
Xant Sep 19
At last,
I feel at ease
Alas,
There goes the leash

I am far too young to be bound,
far too old to stay around
Clueless of what there'll be
outside, I might as well feel lonely
I need no freedom
For in this cage,
I am free

And at last,
I feel at ease
I made this poem half asleep
That's why it makes no sense hahaha
Xant Sep 19
The truth is
what once was yellow brick road
is now red from blood
blotched by dirt
and partly
covered in moss

I see no purpose nor hope
in following this particular road
that leads me back to a place
so called 'home'

It's rather unpromising
and untempting
unwelcoming even
And it makes me think;

At the end of the road,
will I be left to rot
by the people who once swore
that I will be loved
but would leave me standing
forsaken and starving
like they used to do

And so I'd rather stay in Oz
Then to follow the 'yellow brick road'
To get to a place where
I were to be ignored
My high school friend who had a dysfunctional family told me that she would never want to go home ever again.

She sees her family as what was beautiful, now sorrowful.

I could only imagine how her sweet childhood memories (re: yellow brick road) had turned bitter (re: red from blood).

And this poem, I dedicate it to her.
I wish her happiness :)
Xant Sep 19
If I were to say
about my day
There need only three words
And three words only


Such an outburst of profanity,
but they keep me away from insanity


So if you ask me "How was your day?",
there'd only be three words for me to say;


Holy

    Moly

        Guacamole :D
How was your day, everyone? :)
Mine's been very... Crazy
Xant Sep 17
The man's Mr. Rogers
by God he had been sent to fly
And now, he is on his seventh's sky

Sometimes he misses life,
his two kids and his wife,
also the earth where he once thrived

But alone he must go
on this sea of galaxies he must row
and although he feels no sorrow
he fears being lonely

So he sings a tune familiar to all
This time no red sweater nor piano
not even children singing along
for he is alone in the cosmos
heading to the bliss where he belongs
"I have always wanted to have a neighbor just like you,
I've always wanted to live in a neighborhood with you."
This Poem is a tribute to Fred Rogers, a wonderful soul.

Read this poem in another perspective : https://hellopoetry.com/poem/2367625/a-lonesome-astronaut/
Xant Sep 8
The moon peeked into my house last night
It sent signals within its piercing light,
and it said come play outside if you might

   **

"It's pretty lonely out here in the dark,
nothing to hear but the hoot and the bark,
but I have made you a warm cozy blanket of light,
so come play outside if you might"
19/8/2019
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