Allyssa

Allyssa Mar 2019

I watched the world spin from the windshield of this old car.
I felt the slip of the bald tires,
My hands tighten around the wheel,
And I screamed.
I screamed but somewhere in all of that mess,
That chaos,
I knew I was going to be okay.
I knew I was going to live,
Despite totaling my car.

Trees.

#trees #car #tires #rain #alone #accident #puddles

Allyssa Feb 2019

Clatter

There was a vast emptiness within me,
A hole that could never be filled.
My bones clattered inside of this body,
A body no longer my own.
With every step I took I felt the weight of my existence lay heavy on me,
My heart beat like the wings of a humming bird and yet I still felt no warmth

I need warmth.

#warmth #bones #clatter #alone #him #ache #empty

Allyssa Feb 2019

I Love You Too

Laying here in your warm embrace,
While the rain trickled and poured,
Tangled bodies in cold sheets.
You said the words that had befallen me once,
Many times before you I believed but this time,
I did.
“I love you.”

Love

#love #him #alone #past #experience #broken

Allyssa Feb 2019

Snake Skin

I could almost breathe you in,
The way you glided easily through my heart.
You knew the ins and outs,
Twisting and weaving your way up from my ankles,
To my abdomen,
Squeezing.
And even though you squeezed,
I could feel my lungs expand and take you in like an intoxicating breath of fresh poison,
Engulfing every part of me.

Leaving scale imprints on my body as if I’m yours

#snake #breath #poison #air #lungs #squeeze #alone #him

Allyssa Feb 2019

Passing

And it feels a little emptier each time I remember you.
I see you,
But not really.
I feel you,
But you’re not there.
I hear you,
But everything’s a whisper.
After everything,
I miss you.
I miss everything that are and were.

Why did you leave so soon.

#leave #passing #feelings #alone #sorry #dead #family

Allyssa Feb 2019

Dancing with the Devil

My love to you,
Is no longer.
For the whispers that I believed to be your caressing words,
They were not.
It was the wind telling me to run and every aching bone in my body screamed it.
I laughed in the face of nothingness,
Diving into the abyss you created.
The look of sheer terror flashed across that stricken face,
Expecting me to run from that hole.
Darling,
I’ve reveled in the dark and I’ve danced with the devil.
A little heartache can’t hurt me.

I wore the heals you bought me to the dancefloor I left you on.

#dance #devil #laugh #dark #hole #him #alone #heartache #fear #pain

Allyssa Jan 2019

Tension on the Battlefield

Love wasn’t your forté.
No, it was your weapon.
You wielded it like a sword on a revolutionary soldier,
Armed and ready to go onto the battlefield as if you had nothing to lose.
Well my dear,
Fear is my aphrodisiac.
Love was the least of my worries.

Deter me from that ******* you call love

#war #battlefield #alone #him #love #aphrodisiac #fear