Jester: Favorites

Open a Door and find me standing there
When the mirror says no
A door opens and I'm at the end of
A long day away from you.

A car turns over to the tune of runner
Runner so I go
Should I hit the road or the bottle
Nothing makes sense when I see the day
Turn black every which way did you smile
When you didn't have to
So I'll smile back

Apr 2017 Jester

Make Up Sex (With Myself)

Apr 2017 Jester

Morgan

Make Up *** (With Myself)

I've been accepting apologies I was never given,
I've been giving thanks to the pain,
I've been kissing the scars in my skin,
I've been listening to the soft whisper
Always distant in my panic
That says
"Maybe it's not so bad"

I've been laughing at my mistakes,
I've been telling myself I'm okay,
I've been asking for help,
Minus all of the shame

In between dreams
I've been kissing my own hands,
Talking to myself like royalty,
Wearing my make up like face paint,
Dancing in my bedroom,
Alone with the door unlocked

I've been carrying red lipstick in my purse,
I've been spraying perfume in my hair,
I've been waking up with the sun,
Using moisturizer that smells like
Chai tea and raspberries,
Putting lemon in my water

I've been calling my grandmother,
Telling her I love her even though
I know she can't hear me

I've been kissing my sister on the forehead,
Wishing her agony into space

Today I ate
A maple & walnut muffin
And I didn't stick my finger
Down my throat a single time

And I smelled my coffee
Before I drank it
And I wrapped my hands around
The mug
And I thought about how nice it is
To be so warm

Today I sat with ten suicide notes
In my lap,
All written in my script,
From days with a tired brain,
And I said sorry to myself
Over and over again
Until I believed myself
That I'll never do it again

Today I bought a brand new blanket,
The softest one I could find in target,
And I wrapped myself all up in it,
And I thought,
It's time I ******* own kindness

Apr 2017 Jester

Black Swan

Apr 2017 Jester

Zelda

Black Swan

Have you known? Awhile

In coffee shops I sit for hours
Trying to compose a symphony
As eloquent as the words on the pages of the novels I’ve read
But nothing comes
Sweet Lullabies - I hear
Black Swans
Float away

I’ve seen the way the light hit the maple
Small delicate bites across the table
I’ve been waiting for summer days like this
Hoping to be inspired
But nothing comes
Sweet Lullabies - I hear
Black Swans
Float away

She smiled at me
I smiled back
The words echoed through
A slap to the face and I woke up
Sweet Lullabies - I hear
Black Swans
Float away

So underneath a chandelier of forgotten hours is where I’ll be
Surrounded by open windows staring through me
Dancing on a cloud of thorns and bleeding ashes on my tattered pink dress
Wondering “Does it make a difference?”
After all, I was promised your undivided attention
As soon as you walked through those doors and took your seat
The lights dimmed, the curtains rose
I came out, ready
Yet my movements were ignored
My voice forgotten
My masterpiece shattered;
Sweet Lullabies - I hear
Black Swans
Float away

#poetry #coffee #hear #i #black #me #swan #feeling #float #lullbies

Apr 2017 Jester

Gionina

Apr 2017 Jester

steel tulips

Gionina

sometimes i feel as though we are the same person,
but you are the version that is more refined and more talented and more effortless
we do all the same things,
but you take the time to brew beauty
as i let emotion crash through delicate crystal i once tried to create

you are also darker; more solemn

you have long legs
a slender waist
milky skin
and deep brown eyes
that are serious
thoughtful
and earnest

I provide the imperfection,
the blind confidence
and the willingness
to make mistakes
i provide thick thighs
and a booming laugh
that makes it known we are not here to please

we are a literary device;
two parts of one character
that morphs into one
complex heroine by the end of the folktale

Apr 2017 Jester

fight or flight

Apr 2017 Jester

Jenna Lucht

fight or flight

The tide rushes in
And fills my lungs with water,
Slapping the air right out of my chest.
For a brief moment the storm breaks
Giving me just enough time
To breathe deep and push the air
Barely hard enough
To bring me back ashore.
I am enough to control the waves.

A storms breaks out,
Flooding all around and
I am without a life vest,
Enclosing around me from every angle
I barely see an exit.
Soon enough it creeps to my chin
And I am forced to hold my breath.
I am not enough to control the storms.

I shout it as though
The vibrocity of my words
Dictate it's strength.
Ringing through every orifice in my body,
Straining my lungs till I taste the blood
And only a croak is left inside.
I am enough to command the sky.

I shout atop a mountain
As if it were an empty field.
Filling the wind with my fruitless whim,
Charming the skies to not leave me.
All done in vain and with no restraint
I barely pierce the space I stand.
I am not enough to bellow the wind.

#depressed #thoughts #strength #storm #weather #personal #deep #enough #struggle #anxious

Jul 2016 Jester

Dream Girl

Jul 2016 Jester

Sir Jeffrey Langston III

Dream Girl

Your delicate face
has taken residence
in my deepest dreams
eyes the color of cappuccino
with lengthy raven curls
upon your bronzed skin
and your smile
as beautiful
as the morning sun
may I never wake again

#love #passion #getthegirl

Jul 2016 Jester

The eight pyramids of Tibet

Jul 2016 Jester

Mateuš Conrad

The eight pyramids of Tibet

dear western society,

no one cares for the peasant who provides
the pheasant for the royal table -
but when the pheasant isn't there -
the royal orchestra cries out:
where's the pheasant! where's the pheasant!
as if both pheasant and peasant were alike...
indeed, the peasant isn't there to
provide the pheasant for the feast-
and with such vitriol you proudly say:
once these roaming stars that go against
all reason in cosmology disappear, you'll
know that i was here - you'll know -
perhaps the pyramids were only overshadowed
by the Eiffel tower, but many more pyramids
were mentally tattooed into the minds of men -
and rose far greater and were more
harder to overcome that man took to
climbing Everest - stone by stone his legs
encountered a new form of laying brick-on-brick -
for if western society deems me mad
to purge the old hopes of colonial rule - then
i have already chastised my body to have no heart,
and let it be carried on course toward Iran
or Afghanistan - and there entombed -
i hope Western society loves its humour as much
as it loves it's panic and paranoia and picnics
of waiting for the far right to wake up -
and this liberal-leftist mush of kind words to
be shoved into Disneyland of other fantasia.

yours sincerely,

Vermin.