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I know a girl
Who sits behind a computer screen
Wondering if she's worth something

I know a girl
Who stares into space trying to think of reasons
Why people should care if she fades like the seasons

I know a girl
Who is broken more than she can comprehend
Who cuts and scars more when she tries to mend


I am a girl
Who could just cry -- I could just cry
When I see that maybe my words matter
Maybe there are people who like what I write
(Yes, the last stanza doesn't rhyme...
what do you want from me?)
- - -
Thank you all so much.
You know not what you mean to me.
Deep within my soul, there's allot of flattered beats
that longing to hear your sound
Look at into my eyes...
My heart won't pin you down

Even the sky wants you to be with me on the sun
We blaze the flames to get burnt
Your love a drink...
drifting throughout the body like “current”

My love craving for the warmth of your sigh
Your moan gives an honor to moon
Look ov'r the wickedness of my shimmering night
The love ‘Red’ but the heart loves the color you wear...  ‘Maroon’.
It`s been a while I didn`t post anything new.. so, here I go ;)
I'm trying to break out
From underneath the leaves
That fall on top of me
From the tree next to where I sleep

But then I remember
You're no longer there
To help me crawl my way back out
So that I can finally sleep

I'll try to pretend
That this isn't the end
And fill my thoughts with memories
Of your heart across my hands

I just wish I would've been more gentle
And not have held it to hard
And too close to my own
Because now I don't feel at home.
A&G
 Nov 2014 Rare but Relevant
Court
John. I haven't read one letter since you left. I'm scared to open an envelope and see the same note you left before you let your dreams, goals, days all hang from a rope. To be honest I don't know what it was that you needed to hear, what words could've saved your life. But I can say that old coffee shop feels emptier. My room feels colder. My eyes look darker. I don't smile at seasons changing anymore. I've been avoiding all mirrors because I can't bare to see myself without you.
    You were the best person I've ever met. It almost seemed unfair that I let such a perfect person be with a broken mess like me. You were so funny and the way your eyes lit up when you told a story...Oh God. I'm not religious but when you looked at me that way I thought we were both going to hell. Your laugh was all I needed to make a bad day better, oh what I would do to make you laugh.
   I know you hated long car rides and you knew I hated distance. Who knew 6 feet could feel longer than 100,000 miles.? Because now you're resting underground and I don't sleep without sleeping pills. I miss you so much. I miss you. I miss you.
I love you.
I breath but it is not life,
Its just an echo of before
I do not breath,
I do not walk,
I do not see,
Like the way others do surrounding me
I am transparent
I am gone,
They may miss me,
But I am here, but gone,
Am I figment of an imagination,
"Gone to far"
Could this be a dream, I wish
To wake this is gone to far,
I wish to weep, to cry a tear
But my hands are translucent
Fading in & out  
I can see,
I can hear,
But touch the feeling I wish so dear
Eludes me,
"What have I become"
Am I really here??
"Am I  who I was"
Past tense, I speak as if past,
Then I look upon the ground
A shadow of a man now laying
Still on the ground
"He looks familiar"
But cold upon his features,
Then I look closer
"Like a mirror I see a reflection"
Then I see it is me,
Still,
Lifeless,
Cold,
For it is me that is motionless
Then light engulfs me, I am free, I am home.
But where do I go when I've lost hope?
When desolation hugs me
a soul so shattered
                                  You cant breathe

Live or die?
Both are just a lie to comfort us
But who will you be when all we really are is just
             *dust
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