It was supposed to be us
Our dreams, our goals, our lives
Our hopes, our future, our work
The family we were supposed to have
The fears we were supposed to overcome
The trials we were supposed to endure
The love we were supposed to save
It was supposed to be us
But now?
It's just me

I told others that your name

Is now a taboo; forbidden to be uttered

Because the mere mention of you

Hits me with everything we ever had

Hits me with everything we could have

Hits me to my core that I get stunned

By everything and anything of us 

So your name cannot be said by anyone

Unless it is whispered by me

Delete it
I keep telling myself
The mornings and evenings
I keep hovering
Over the action

Delete it
The photos and videos
The calendar we created
Your birthday
Our shared moments

Delete it
Just do it
A simple action
The smallest movement
One finger is all it takes

Delete it
And throw it all away
Permanently gone
Your name erased
Storage finally cleared

Delete it
But I am hesitating
And begging
To ignore that button
Another day, another excuse

Delete it
What a coward I am
Delaying the inevitable
It's not right
To still look at you

Delete it
I know I will, I promise
But even if I delete it
It's all stored in my heart
And how can I delete that?

Even when you haven't said a word in years

I am still here, thinking and caring about you

Addiction, Obsession 

I don't know the difference

Nor do I really care 

You're so toxic 

Yet here I am 

Asking for more

You can break me apart

Rip my heart to pieces

Grind my feelings to dust 

Countless bits of me 

Thown to the wind and dirt

Yet each and every one of them

Every part of me

Still belongs to you

You're so beautiful in the mornings
With your wild hair and grumpy mood
Mumbling about the early alarm
Scrunched eyes, looking for your glasses
Saying good morning to me quietly 
Even sometimes still groggy
Even sometimes half asleep 
I get to wake up to that 
And every morning
I get to fall in love all over again