Shhhhh did you hear me scream
Shhhhh it's in your dreams
Shhhhh did hear me cry
Shhhhh can you tell me why
Why am I screaming and crying
Why do I feel like I am dying
Shhhhh why do I look so sad
Shhhhh why is she so mad
Tell me why we didn't just talk
Why did I just get up and walk
Shhhhh do you know how you make me feel
Shhhhh why is this so unreal
I know this love is in my heart
I think it just needs a kick-start
Shhhhh why do I stare at the phone
Shhhhh why do i feel so alone.

When does someone open their eyes and see
When does she know she’s in too deep
Why does she hate herself
Why has she not killed herself

Why I’ll tell you why
She’s too strong to take the easy way out that’s why

Some days she wishes with all her might she will die tonight
But she never does die that night
Or any night those thoughts enter the mind

Before you judge me for doing what I’ve done
Keep in mind
That it was because I felt dead inside
And needed to feel alive inside
Just because I’m breathing
Doesn’t mean I feel alive inside

Suddenly, everything I see from my eyes is negative.
Suddenly, everything I hear from my ears is negative.
Suddenly, everything I think with my brain is negative.
Suddenly, I block out all positivity, nothing but hostility.
This happens every once in a while.
At first I thought it was strange, you know?..
I was able to hide and pretend, but now I can barely comprehend.
My curiosity to "what are these feelings" and my thoughts about "I wonder why this is happening to me" now turned into curiosity about the afterlife and thoughts about ways to end it.
When I say end it, I mean ways to end this pain.
It's a pain that is barely describable.
It's a pain that I can't seem to understand.