You can busy yourself about the day
Keep the wretched words away
Write, so they are not so strong
Read, so you do nothing wrong.

They will catch up on you, however
With you and your heart forever,
These tiny little gnawing thoughts
With their presence you are lost.

Among the headaches and the pain
In this place nothing to gain

Shut your eyelids tight
When the stars are high
And the moon is bright

But try and wish what you may
You cannot keep the thoughts away
On your little devoured soul
You wish, you wish you could be whole.

Deep in  the Ocean of Time
Right into the layers of space
Dwelling through infinite dimensions
There existed an atom

It searched for a friend
Found one to its taste
Lost an electron
Gained an electron
A bond was then formed

It has no name
But there was no worry
For name is but an identification

But see there's some more atoms
And they too did the same
A little bit of sacrifice
For love needs it
Lost an electron
Gained an electron
A bond was then formed
They started dancing

Growing in complexity.
Living things, masses of atoms for they were
Dancing a pattern ever more intricate
DNA and protein
Cells and tissues
Life came
At long last man came

He was the observer
Who measures the universe
Out of the cradle
Onto the dry land
Here it is standing
Atoms with consciousness
Matter with curiosity
Stands in the ocean of time
Wondering
Aye
I, a universe of atoms?
Or an atom in the universe?

The one yellow dress
you have is in the floor
of your red room
with your CD's
By the door

Chester in the corner
Missing heart in the other
Missing you in my
Missing heart
Why even bother

Books on the shelf
In alphabetical order
Cross the line
It's the border

Handmade blanket
handmade pillow
Listen to
Wheeping willow

Love with the lights off
Love the night on
Lust when no one is looking
Strawberry cake cooking

I have to leave
One last time
I have to go
It's half past nine

I write
therefore
I am insane-
not in the sense that I am nuts
or I get mad around and trouble people
but I stay lost-
lost in my words and meditations-
I converse around with an empty sheet of paper
and mock it with my pen
so that it can verbalize
and dribble out its pain
or may be happiness.
I write
to nourish my soul
with my ever-growing
and never ending insanity
Normal people speak
and gossip all day long
to gratify themselves
but I do not
so what?
I write
therefore
I am insane.

Stampede of fragments barraged
Through flames of remorse
Constantly denying truth
The pain in my heart dying for blood
Blood of courage with eminent power
Streaming through the veins
Pumping ardor beats of fervor
"I want to be myself again"

With trembling heart I approach
in search of that which you so ardently seek
knowing somehow that this remorse
of the stampede of fragments barraged
of which you so fervently speak
will only lead you to more intense pain--
but if you will allow me to,
I will help you find your true inner self again...

I have sinned, slaughtered the innocent
Their minds are no longer theirs
I created monsters eating monsters
Hatred augmented to decree misery
It's too late to change
So many lives I've hurt
Don't waste your time on me

But you have to know this from my own heart:
though you've done so much wrong
it's never too late** to make a new start--
throw out your miserable, uncaring, heartless ways
and look to me to help you
to find fulfilment in living better days
by turning from the evil that clutches your soul
Hand in hand, we can do this together
Let me give, teach, share with you what I have come to know...

How I wish I had two lives.
One to live to the fullest,
and the other to sleep away.