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Evan Hayes Jun 2018
Mr. Hayes for the last time we don't have any knowledge of guests that are outside
Waiting for you tonight
So please enjoy your stay help yourself to some red wine oh now
Chicago is your city now you've been here enough by now so know
Leave your family and your friends behind
You don't need to waste your time
Have your self to some red wine oh no

Mr. Hayes for the first time I think I saw you smile what brought you down to the front desk
I said my key card stopped working
And you're exposing your red chest so now
I think I'm coming to say hi from now
So let's have us some red wine oh no
I've made a new friend so let's
Grab coffee you see
I've stayed here for 3 weeks but I don't know any place so please
Show me a diner I am not that picky
You are not a grifter like me
I'm new to Chicago but I know where to go

Mr. Hayes for 3rd time we don't need to go Southside please put down the red wine we are in the middle of the road
I don't know why you want to see the Shameless house
Just look at my white blouse oh no
I wanted to spend some time outside of the hotel
So please talk to me I am only trying to help so stop ignoring me
Mr. Hayes please slow down I don't know what Mudhoney is, but you do

Mr. Hayes has moved on now he's in a new town away from all you ******* clowns
He has whiskey instead of wine so take your time and slow your dime have a Corona lime
Mr. Hayes please come back home your wife misses you
She has her pictures too
So please take your life out of that town come back to Tennessee drink some Hennessy instead
Mr. Hayes
Evan Hayes Mar 2017
Death is not something to talk about
But here I am
Dead as I can be
Feared by ****
Near everything
I guess you can watch the sunset
As I wither like my grandfather's musket

Death is not to be taken lightly
Shaken tightly in my boots
Sin by shooting rightly at old coots
I see our old pictures and
We are sold fixtures in this life
You're not here
I watched myself die a little
Here in this room

I lay on my bed
Dead inside and out
Sin by my mind and wrought
With disgust with myself
I'm numb
And quite frankly broken
We can lay in my father's truck bed
And forget the prom, what a **** head
I am

Gemini has died in me
Died without me
Gone living
Without me
I have tried to come to grips
Been at the tip
Of just leaving this town
I'm so hurt
Worst of all
I reject myself
From myself
I deserve nothing
But pain

I missed you of course
The last time I cried
I threw up
I kissed you, for the last time
I tried to chew up my feelings
And really forget everything
But how can you forget love
I want to live, but not like this
I'm so unhappy
And it's not your fault
But you certainly didn't help

You're smiling now
That's nice
I wish you smiled with me
I wish I smiled with me
All at once my world stopped
My heart has stopped
We are all so close to death
My heart could stop
And I would be forgotten
So easily
Why am I like this

I am just a collection
Of memories of you
Does everyone really want
To hear about my ex girlfriend
I remember you so vividly
You make it so easy
I have an aching in my chest that I've never felt before
And hope I never feel again

Look at me
Because I can't
Death is real
When I light up
For a smoke
I think of you
I stink of you
And drink to you
The big empty window
On the 5th floor
Now mocks me
*******, me

I don't want to be here
I want to be with you
But you don't want to be with me
Right now
And that hurts less and less each day
But it still hurts

The feeling of being alone
Is what I have become
Alone every night of every day
My person is gone
My bedroom still smells of you
I want to learn nothing from this
Your absence screams at me
Nothingness seemed cool
Until I felt like nothing
Now I feel nothing
Irony is not cool
Death is not what I want
  Nov 2016 Evan Hayes
Lunar
I just want you
to be happy
but sometimes
and selfishly
I want to be
your happiness

But
'happiness is a choice'
you say
and you didn't choose me

I clung onto the idea
since you made me happy
it would be the same for you

What is happiness now?
where has it gone to?
In time, society has robbed us
the real meaning of happiness

Go on your own way
and pursue your happiness
for your smile, is my smile
your laugh, is my laugh

and I'll be happy
when you find your happiness
because I love you
always have, always will
Evan Hayes May 2016
Let's go!
Off to the park we go
And leave behind our dreams of being cool
Someone will find us in the morning
Leave our families mourning
As we lay down in the grass
I wonder how much time will pass
Until you travel the world and leave me
Please please please believe me
I want to go off with you
But you don't have a clue
I am just a scared little boy
And you are a grown woman
What would I do without you
I have only tried to
Love you

Let's go!
Off to the park we go
And listen to out ****** taste in music
I promise you can choose it
Go ahead
Kick my *** all **** night
Show me What's it's like
To bow down
I'm bogged down
Let's go
Away from this town we go
And leave our memories
Insecure tendencies

How crazy is it
I wanna talk about it
I'll just throw another fit
And ***** about it
I wanna **** about it
And decide to go with you
Can I go with you?

Let's go
Time to elope now
Forget our families and so called friends
We don't need to try again
You are all I want
And all I need
Let's go to the park today
I hope we won't be late
I can not wait
Evan Hayes Mar 2016
I had a dream where you  left me
My toll is pretty hefty
Don't leave me
I don't want to be alone
I just tried your cell phone
Didn't pick up
I'm ******* sick of
The way I feel
When you're not around
I just kinda have a frown
Because
I can't feel your love when you're asleep
I'm in my bed weeping
Thoughts of leaving me seeping
Through the cracks of my mind
And all I find are visions
Of you going away
Today
Leaving me alone
**** don't wanna be alone
I'd miss you
I love you
****
Pick up your phone
Please
Evan Hayes Mar 2016
And sometimes I wish you would know that
I'm just a ******* cynic
Massive hypochondriactive ******
And all I want to do is blow
This dust away from the shelf
While I'm choking myself
On the thought
Of us ******* in a parking lot
****,  I wish I thought about that before I wrote it
**** the games I'm a monster I show it
To the lucky one girl,  mine
She likes whiskey not wine
With the bleach blonde hair
No, I don't want to share her
With you useless toys
Just a bunch of ******* fuckboys
Trying to play with her emotions
I'll make you run quicker, locomotions
Trains on the train tracks
******* on a bed on your back
****
I want to
Kiss your neck
Tell ya I love ya to heck
Pull your hair
I want to ******* there
Against the wall
No I don't give a **** who saw
**** yall
**** the people
General populace
I'll **** your face
And smile for the camera

Why?
Because **** feelings I've got
I just wanna love you a lot
In my bed
In the car
Outside
Far far away
From the town
No sounds
No breathe
No lights
It's the best
No music
Or **** talk
But after I wake up
I'm pulling me out of park
Driving off
To the sunset
Evan Hayes Mar 2016
My throat burns from the words
That I've learned from you
This drink from the sink
And I'm thinking about you
Again
**** me i'm sick of the *******
I'm not the man that is fit
Enough for you
I'm not the man you wanted me to be
I'm just a boy stuck in a tree

My eyes are heavy
My ears are big
My smile is crooked and wicked
You hate me right?
You hate my life
Your plan is to ruin it
Soil it with the tears of salt
And years of walking away
From the issue
My best friend is someone
I can't even speak to
And even though I know why
I'd like to repeat you
Past, present, no future
My thread is tearing,  no suture
Leave my chest open
Leave my dead heart spoken
For me
Leave me dying on the floor
Of your fourth
Bedroom apartment
Everytime I do something
I always ******* start ****
I don't even know you
But yet you know me
Better than anyone else
Why do you get me
And still ******* test me
Do you think I'll surprise you
Who am I to try you
I'm leaving soon
Full moon
******* moonlight
******* who right?
******* you right tonight
Right?

I can sit in this **** spot
And wait for a fresh ***
Of coffee to tempt me
Hopefully I will attend the
Funeral for my ******* friend
And hope that my end
Is coming soon

Promise that you will remember me
Even when I move away
Promise that you will write about me
Promise that you will write to me

I ****** up tonight and figured I call you
In case you answered tomorrow
I'm hoping that you I can borrow
Some of your blood
See mine is a flood in the bathroom floor
And although I have no right
It wasn't from a knife
See I've been drinking to forget
Drinking to regret the things I've seen
The things I've lived and cleaned with bleach
I'm basically a **** up
Nothing but a **** up
To the man in the mirror
But won't come any hither
****
I don't mean to be so depressive
I just try get this oppressive
Nature off of my chest
Set sails for the west
Searching for gold
In a city of older
Folk
I'm ****** up in my mental state
And yes,  I will always remember the date
I'm not a ******* good person,
A hero,
Or a ******* man
I'm just a mother ******* *******
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