It's hard to be thankful for the past year,
when its been spent breathing in stale air and looking through broken glasses. Sometimes it seems easier to leave the wound open and unattended, knowing that even after it's healed it will scar.

But there is power in becoming brighter than the reality you surround yourself with, knowing that despite the ending there are the moments in between, a colour coated scene that reminds you the cold will come, but it will not last forever.

A warm drive home after a cold day,
cozy hands and falling leaves,
an in between moment,
brighter than the darkness could of ever planned for,
we are eating dessert in the tv light,
and I am thankful for you.

of one thing
i am sure
and that is
that i am
unsure of
myself
and it’s funny
how i can’t
sleep but my
chest closes its
eyes and hums
with a heartbeat
that is unsure of
itself, too.
i try to morph
into a body
i don’t feel
belongs to me
just so i can
fit somewhere
fit in somewhere
and i tell so
many stories
about the
universe, it
forever feels
like i am trying
to remain lost.
i am unsure
of myself;
connecting the
moles on my
skin as if they
will spell out
something bigger
so i can feel
like i matter,
at least for
a little while.
i sleep beside
myself, stare at
a reflection
so unfamiliar
i couldn’t even
identify it in
a crowd of
strangers, but
i am trying.
and one day
i’m sure i’ll
be sure
of myself but
until then,
i’ll morph into
someone i can
be proud of
and hope that
the universe
sends me back
to myself.