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Mike Hauser Nov 2018
I just bought a turkey
In dire need of tenderize
Also a quick summer thaw
As this chick's as cold as ice

Must have froze it in the tundra as
I dive deep into the internet
Where it's got me wondering
Why I myself didn't think of this

It says to tie up both its legs
With a nylon stringy thingy
Hey! Get that out your head!
This ain't nothing *****!

Hook the turkey to the bumper
And take it for a ride
I watched it from my rear view
And mirror on the side

I watched it twirl and tumble
I watched it twist and shout
I watched it as it changed its shape
From inside into out

I thought I heard it gobble
As it bounced itself along
Checking progress at every red light
Tenderized...yes, but not yet thawed

The roads must be colder this year
Then at first, I thought
I hop back into my jalopy
For a few more jaunts around the block

I make it back to my place
Thinking all is perfect all is well
Untie the turkey, if that's what it is
It's a little hard to tell

Now with that part of the preparation done
With the turkey and I safe back home
I plop it into the waiting oven
And gently turn it on

Here we are a few hours later
As the conversations and good times begin
Sitting around the dinner table
My guests all marvel at my hen

There's only one slight question
And they asked me if I knew
I reply...why yes that is white meat
It's just a tad bit bruised
Mike Hauser Nov 2014
I just bought a turkey
In dire need of tenderize
Also a quick summer thaw
As this chick's as cold as ice

Must have froze it in the tundra as
I dive deep into the internet
Where it's got me wondering
Why I myself didn't think of this

It says to tie up both it's legs
With a nylon stringy thingy
Hey! Get that out your head!
This ain't nothing *****!

Hook the turkey to the bumper
And take it for a ride
I watched it from my rear view
And mirror on the side

I watched it twirl and tumble
I watched it twist and shout
I watched it as it changed its shape
From inside into out

I thought I heard it gobble
As it bounced itself along
Checking progress at every red light
Tenderized...yes, but not yet thawed

The roads must be colder this year
Than at first I thought
I hop back into my jalopy
For a few more jaunts around the block

I make it back to my place
Thinking all is perfect all is well
Untie the turkey, if that's what it is
It's a little hard to tell

Now with that part of the preparation done
With the turkey and I safe back home
I plop it into the waiting oven
And gently turn it on

Here we are a few hours later
As the conversations and good times begin
Sitting around the dinner table
My guests all marvel at my hen

There's only one slight question
And they asked me if I knew
I reply...why yes that is white meat
It's just a tad bit bruised
Mike Hauser Nov 2015
I just bought a turkey
In dire need of tenderize
Also a quick summer thaw
As this chick's as cold as ice

Must have froze it in the tundra as
I dive deep into the internet
Where it's got me wondering
Why I myself didn't think of this

It says to tie up both it's legs
With a nylon stringy thingy
Hey! Get that out your head!
This ain't nothing *****!

Hook the turkey to the bumper
And take it for a ride
I watched it from my rear view
And mirror on the side

I watched it twirl and tumble
I watched it twist and shout
I watched it as it changed its shape
From inside into out

I thought I heard it gobble
As it bounced itself along
Checking progress at every red light
Tenderized...yes, but not yet thawed

The roads must be colder this year
Than at first I thought
I hop back into my jalopy
For a few more jaunts around the block

I make it back to my place
Thinking all is perfect all is well
Untie the turkey, if that's what it is
It's now a little hard to tell

Now with that part of the preparation done
With the turkey and I safe back home
I plop it into the waiting oven
And gently turn it on

Here we are a few hours later
As the conversations and good times begin
Sitting around the dinner table
My guests all marvel at my hen

There's only one slight question
And they asked me if I knew
I reply...why yes that is white meat
It's just a tad bit bruised
Heading out of town to a cabin in the woods with no phone or internet service. (My wife's thankful for that!) Happy Thanksgiving ya'll!
Mike Hauser Nov 2016
I just bought a turkey
In dire need of tenderize
Also a quick summer thaw
As this chick's as cold as ice

Must have froze it in the tundra as
I dive deep into the internet
Where it's got me wondering
Why I myself didn't think of this

It says to tie up both it's legs
With a nylon stringy thingy
Hey! Get that out your head!
This ain't nothing *****!

Hook the turkey to the bumper
And take it for a ride
I watched it from my rear view
And mirror on the side

I watched it twirl and tumble
I watched it twist and shout
I watched it as it changed its shape
From inside into out

I thought I heard it gobble
As it bounced itself along
Checking progress at every red light
Tenderized...yes, but not yet thawed

The roads must be colder this year
Than at first I thought
I hop back into my jalopy
For a few more jaunts around the block

I make it back to my place
Thinking all is perfect all is well
Untie the turkey, if that's what it is
It's a little hard to tell

Now with that part of the preparation done
With the turkey and I safe back home
I plop it into the waiting oven
And gently turn it on

Here we are a few hours later
As the conversations and good times begin
Sitting around the dinner table
My guests all marvel at my hen

There's only one slight question
And they asked me if I knew
I reply...why yes that is white meat
It's just a tad bit bruised
Tired of seeing this yet again? Hey....lighten up! It's fun!
Sienna Luna Nov 2015
Dear, let me tenderize you like meat slap the silliness from heat bubbling bubbling bubbling to a boil.

Dear, let me technically arouse you by letting each word escape like exasperation, a depletion of the senses as every finger or pressure point examines your body from head-to-toe.

Dear, let me be no longer ashamed to touch or hold you close, let our breathing and beating submerge into higher thinking.

Incinerating flames that lick the grate.

Dear, let me dive deep into the crevice of your brain, all mushy grey matter, all the same.

Dear, let me slice it open and **** out all the juices, licking licking licking each curve and crevice,

My supple pink snake-like tongue reaching deeper deeper deeper into your mind.

Dear, let me sink into your reality, bit by bit, and piece by piece until cohesiveness lays its eggs inside the deep hole within you.

Dear, let me scratch the surface, trading dimes for dust and pecs for fluff.

Let me swim in the depths of your hectic personality.

Let me get to know you and all your originality.

Let me breathe in your values and slurp up your mature decisions.

Let me caress your life like two bulbous lights that hang from the existence of time.

Let me illuminate you, serenade you, quiz you while ******* your sense of self-esteem.

Dear, let me dream your dreams.

Dear, let me sink my ***** mind games into your wet social brain.
Don’t let the pressure get to you.

Passion may play a key part in the sway!

Let me suckle your sweet thoughts, play with your deriving initiatives.

Let me hold your ideas in the sweat of my thighs, burning with desire to see myself through cobalt eyes.

Let me feel the hot ***** of your ethical intentions and clear apparitions.

Let me analyze your prerogatives and **** with your distribution methods.

Dear, let me fiddle with your political views, (in the “other room”) and tickle your soft solutions on creating a world of doom.

Let me ****** your sustainability, flirt with your progressive mindset, and squeeze your plump ambitions until they burst!

Dear, let me push gently on your sensitive issues with your parents until they become less apparent.

Let me stroke your disagreements with foreign policy until they shriek with mercy!

Let me take you further and touch your blind senses to a pink paranoia of retentive defensive pretenses.

Let me cuddle and snuggle your sense of self-worth and pleasure your brain with mind-bending words.

Dear, let me dance with your intelligence
until we sink into oblivious mind-*** bliss…….
Mike Hauser Nov 2017
I just bought a turkey
In dire need of tenderize
Also a quick summer thaw
As this chick's as cold as ice

Must have froze it in the tundra as
I dive deep into the internet
Where it's got me wondering
Why I myself didn't think of this

It says to tie up both it's legs
With a nylon stringy thingy
Hey! Get that out your head!
This ain't nothing *****!

Hook the turkey to the bumper
And take it for a ride
I watched it from my rear view
And mirror on the side

I watched it twirl and tumble
I watched it twist and shout
I watched it as it changed its shape
From inside into out

I thought I heard it gobble
As it bounced itself along
Checking progress at every red light
Tenderized...yes, but not yet thawed

The roads must be colder this year
Than at first I thought
I hop back into my jalopy
For a few more jaunts around the block

I make it back to my place
Thinking all is perfect all is well
Untie the turkey, if that's what it is
It's a little hard to tell

Now with that part of the preparation done
With the turkey and I safe back home
I plop it into the waiting oven
And gently turn it on

Here we are a few hours later
As the conversations and good times begin
Sitting around the dinner table
My guests all marvel at my hen

There's only one slight question
And they asked me if I knew
I reply...why yes that is white meat
It's just a tad bit bruised
Apparently I've turned my holiday poems into a yearly event.
With tender eyes
You tenderize me,
meat hooks sinking in
with the looks
that guide the
knife that slices
with each touch of skin
the cold metallic table,
unable yet manic
falling apart,
panic attacking
with each touch of the blade,
the butchers art,
taken from a stable,
for the sake of forsaken fables
feeble chunks,
fragments made into saleable pieces
the heart aside a different species
in a bucket,
It'll make great sausages.
Nat Lipstadt Apr 2017
~
Bala^ comments:
"alignment - any which way one can if possible to make
****** and ******* simultaneously happen,
without any best position plan"

~

may all the gods bless you, Bala,
for waking me at 4:33 with this poetic induction
coaxed from my spinal fluid sanity
with perfected clarity

my own circadian rhythm masters internal,
the most reliably unreliable human container technology teachers,
semi-skilled in the entrainment arts for this impoverished body mine,
deem it appropriate that early morn messages of
propitious possibility be greeted immediately

entrapped, awaken me at four AM with great glee,
because these elusives^^  know exactly what stirs
this being's cochlear cockles into birthing a
poetic cookie ******* *******

your message meme provoking, inducing,
be honest man - simply seducing, my within
by your teasing words from without


"without any best position plan"

not to confuse the mere appearance of a routine
as worthy of the entitlement of "plan,"
much as the poem's own vanity chooses it own alignment
the relationship, the relativity -
always the
flexing flummoxing freaking insatiable pleasuring

when your thrusting unplanned message
****** and bests my brain,
releasing a fully formed, instantaneous parrying poem
from an aroused, passing, unsanitized, second of sanity

for no better *** than this...
as per the unplan?

this tissued life,
this in and out
of punching and counterpunching continuous,
but rarely contiguous,
for we are never aligned for more than a moment,
the moment that almost always goes unnoticed,
for the heart's ***** tissues,
are mostly torn by how life
uses us roughly

so here is an aligned confession fecundity

this poetry gig, my salve,
to tenderize the daily redness,
the irritation residual of having no plan

however these fingerprints decided for you,
to present, upon completion,
this soft-spoken loud *******,
a peaking, not a leaking,
** ** ** - a screaming

hallelujah, i'm aligned!

the man found albeit briefly
a  beat, a plan and its verbal, herbal,
best solution

may all the gods bless you, Bala,
for waking me at 4:33 with this poetic induction
coaxed from my spinal fluid sanity
with perfected clarity

the man and his plan, for a mega-second
his best,
unplanned but got and given,
in poetic planetary alignment
positioned

as are you and I -
the thousands of miles of distance tween us
as you read this
collage collapse
into a singular synapse
of ****** and *******

hallelujah, we are aligned!*

~

disclaimer:
anything you say to me, can and will be used
for a poem

~
5:55am
April 1, 2017
^K Balachandran  comment on
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/1897028/alignment-the-theory-of-poetic-relativity/
"any which way
one can
if possible to make ****** and *******
simultaneously happen
without any best position plan"
Bala

^^http://hellopoetry.com/poem/747333/the-elusives/
Nat Lipstadt Jun 2013
Father's Way: Tell me a story, Dad

What power we possess,
when the innocent demand,
at the time of cozy bed and sandman,
"Tell me a story,"

To gentle the monsters
in the closet of their heads,
grant them a peace naive that's lost after
they learn the D words, disappointment, death,
Till then, promises unfettered, the best yet to come.

The story, you, grantor, they, grantees,
Scent their dreams,
perfume their dreams,
sprinkle their safety net, blanky, rag doll:
- scent with mom's hairspray and dad's special smell,
musk, balsam, gasoline and body odor

- scent with cherrywood falsehoods to caress,
till morning's burnished glory ascends,
thru window, tenderize the cheeks of my babes,
prep them for the truths to be learned that day.

In tones most imploring,
glances fawning,
tis us, they do deceive,    
for adult arrogance demands
in God we Trust, that they,
will believe our words,
will indeed, make them rest
till new day's slow and subtle dawning

Tis the same tomfoolery that leads us
to drink repeatedly from the trough of
best laid plans and self-deception

You believed your own narrative
will be the one he scripted,
while standing day-dreaming,
sweating on subway platform,
admiring beaches and beauties
from station walls lifted,
waiting for the train
that only eventually comes,

that train, that station, whose smell reminds you
of mom's hairspray and dad's special smell,
musk, balsam and motor oil, and body odor,
a ******* reminder of dreams yet uncrystallized,
and stories your father told, unrealized,
tho train has come, they have not

Write me a narrative, Dad,
and please advise
if tinker or tailor will be my trade,
fix my details, dear pater, par example,
pick my institution of higher learning,
my future alma mater, on my day of birth,
promise me gentility, no harm no foul, mirth,
All the days of my life.

Please advise if I shall be a
wife abuser, communist, or a ****
****** poet/user,
word rich and pocket poor,
stealing ideas from everyone,
red blooded or blue~green,
a true believer, a born again,
an agnostic, my own truths, to disabuse

tell me father, will I die warmed,
surrounded by generations of my progeny
or in pauper's grave, a life long ward of
one true mate, in loco parentis all of my days,
a child, a dependent, of noster paternal state?

Please Pop, pick wise,
the life and lies, the faces and disguises,
I will need employ to achieve success
in the eyes of my reading beholders,
who own the liens on my soul
because of the promises I believed,
when you sang me
glowing lullabies of my future days,
how everyone would love my stories,
my poems, someday...


June 11, 2011
Updated on Father's Day 2013
Many notes but the only one my father told me was about the white and black horses and their misadventures, a half a century passed, and I can feel his mustache, his goatee, tickling my senses.
Thomas Mackie May 2021
Carved from marble,
                                                   marvelous and draped in my covers,
                                        floating above my head in a puff of smoke or
                                                                ­                 as a cartoonish memory

I stay in bed today,
peeking through the blinds.
Surrounded by no one but my
soft and artificial menagerie,
I'm bubbling at the lip.

There are sacks of rice sitting
right above my hips and they're
heavy. Who will help me hold them?
Pressing a thumb to the surface and wincing;
I can feel the grains shifting under my skin.

Today I cooked the rice.
                                                           ­                                             
                   ­                                                                 ­               , I swear.
Heat built up in the *** til steam was lifting off my skin^
Hard crunchy bits to tenderize,
softening under the lid.

When I felt that click,
I broke out my wooden spoon
and ate a big plate.
The warm fluffy substance blessed my full cheeks and belly.
For the first time,
I felt like I wasn't hungry.

Maybe tomorrow when I bathe
I'll grow 3 or 4 times my size.
Water-logged
I will fill up the tub,
ceramic squeezing my fleshy form into a
rectangular shape.

Stick a spoon in
and eat me piece by piece.
a metaphor for using meditation to overcome physical and emotional but mostly physical pain
Nat Lipstadt Jun 2014
June 11, 2011
Updated on Father's Day 2013


Father's Way: Tell me a story, Dad

what power we possess,
when the innocent demand,
at the time of cozy bed and
sandman,
"Tell me a story,"

to gentle the monsters
in the closet of their heads,
grant them a peace naive that's lost after
they learn the words that start with D,
(disappointment, death),
till then,
promises unfettered,
the best yet to come.

the story,
you, grantor,
they, grantees.

scent their dreams,
perfume their dreams,
sprinkle their safety net, blanky, rag doll:
- scent with mom's hairspray and
dad's special smell,
musk, balsam, gasoline and body odor

- scent with cherrywood falsehoods to caress,
till morning's burnished glory ascends,
thru window, tenderize the cheeks of my babes,
prep them for the truths
to be learned that day.

in tones most imploring,
glances fawning,
t'is us, we,
them do deceive,    
for adult arrogance demands
in God we Trust,
that they,
will believe our words,
will indeed,
make them rest
till new day's slow and subtle dawning

t'is the same tomfoolery that leads us
to drink repeatedly
from the trough of
best laid plans and self-deception

you believed your own narrative
would be the one he,
your dad scripted,
while standing day-dreaming,
sweating on subway platform,
admiring beaches and beauties,
from station walls lifted,
waiting for the train
that only eventually comes

that train, that station,
whose smell reminds you
of mom's hairspray and dad's special smell,
(musk, balsam and motor oil, and body odor),
a ******* reminder of dreams yet uncrystallized,
and stories your father told,
unrealized,
tho train has come,
they have not

write me a narrative, Dad,
and please advise
if tinker or tailor will be my trade,
fix my details, dear pater,
par example,
pick my institution of higher learning,
my future alma mater,
on my day of birth,
promise me gentility,
no harm no foul,  and mirth,
all the days of my life.

please advise
if I shall be a
wife abuser, communist, or
a **** vanilla
****** poet/user

word rich and pocket poor,
stealing ideas from everyone,
red blooded or blue~green,
a true believer, a born again,
an agnostic, my own truths,
to disabuse

tell me father,

will I die warmed,
surrounded by generations of my progeny
or in pauper's grave,
a life long ward of
a one true mate,
it,
in loco parentis all of my days,
making me a child, a dependent,
of casa noster paternal state?

Please Pop,
pick wise,
the life and lies,
the faces and disguises,
I will need employ to
achieve success
in the eyes of my reading beholders,
who own the liens on my soul
because of the promises I believed,
when you sang me
glowing lullabies of my future days,
how everyone would
love my stories,
my poems,
someday...
Reposting - first posted here 366 days ago...
Mateuš Conrad Aug 2018
Bacardí , ooh la-la (yuppie
  kicked in the shins))
half of my head is in Bacardí , ooh-la-la (
      new york yuppie kicked in the shins))
she took me back to Finca Vigia , la-la-la
ooh, but my head is in content
  workings of a message in a bottle
  (without, the Police)...
there's something about her pride
on mixing cola and lime... (ooh la-la)
Bacardí, ooh la-la (new yorker yuppie
kicked in the shins)
she didn't walk up to me with 'you "need" a drink?'
(like that Frank Sinatra quote
about a day well spent and feeling
even better after a martini)...
(when she came in the room
    i forgot i was sleeping)
she said there's a lot of boys she can do with (ooh)
(but i can't without you)
i knew she forgot in a minute
   about the ginger Scotch lass
     ms. amber...
(that summer night that turned to
be every night of the entire year from then
                                on in)
and mama says i'm a drunk...
    but she doesn't mind a drunk that
steps up to do the dishes, cook...
   and washes the toilet with bleach...
after telling her to the question:
why are you sighing, puffing like
a red-riding hood like that?
eased up?
  what from?
took a **** like a german zeppelin
just dropped a bomb on London
during the WWI night raid...
    **** me... funk! ****! bosh!
       sank like a meteor or a grenade
into the water...
                but **** me, you ever read
the mini story on these bottles?
ha ha... the Cubans call
     the distillers... maestros!
   it's like symphony for them!
    de ron Bacardí... ahem...
maestro de ron Bacardí!
                                      one night,
   i'm allowed that...
                                       given that
i already know with tender meat poetry...
like you do with tender meat in general...
you tenderize it.
Dominique Arnold Mar 2014
So tell me who did you come to see the Butcher, the Baker, or the Rhyme Maker or probably all three.

Well they say the Butcher is a wonder with the meat, that's why he has all the women clamoring in the street. He wills and kills to tenderize that veil making it soft and sweet so they know the deal.  

They say the Baker is always up to no good, and he's also one of the main problems that stood, because he would cook it, cut it, and sell it for a profit. Had them all hooked as they said, they could fly while on it.
  
They say the Rhyme Maker keeps to his own.
That his minds an endless wander, and he always seems to roam. You can catch him on a park bench writing to a beat, or just calmly walking as he takes in the street. He's a nut, he's a genius that's what some might say, but I know the truth, he just writes what he felt and saw that day.
Nat Lipstadt Aug 2013
The only reason I write is because....
There are words, solitary and un-empowered., unemployed.
Single, yet, Singular.

I de-file them, dis-organize,  tabulate their DNA,
Recombinant, transgenderize, tenderize!

Clichés banned, need chunky pieces of  
Shock and saucy sounds that once said aloud,
Never stand still, reverberate, days after first
Spoke.

Words that spoke, spike, such that
Days from now you will come back to this poem,
Sheepish, because you
Spiked,
When these words, you
Spoke.


Thus impaled,
You mine mine veins, thrombosis temples pulse,
You will close contact with your ven,
Intersect memory and prophecy
And never write again the same way.

For having left the sanctuary of the familiar,
You will find the truest safety,
Is
None.

Answer the posed uniquely, then,
You memberize in the company of poets.
This oath believed and bespoke
Both burdened and enlightened,
You, tuned and turned,
Speak:

The only reason I write is...
Because




August 29th 2013
Now, now, now, now, now, now, now!
Terrible!
You can do better
You can always do better
Yet always can't never
Suckin' on a sliver in the tool-shed-deluxe, AND I've GROWN depressed again
Sept' NOT cause' I tend to tenderize dem' words!  Badly written, this mind un-fittin' for deez words I'm sittin'! Red marks, red marks n' squiggle 'neath my stupid words a lot like me and my arms n' body!  I am incorrectly myself far too often to see truly true pieces beyond the sky's fragility be she man nor woman yet the classically pronounced hermaphrodit-E!  I stink and smell like rotting hell except worse due to too many twos or were they duos throwing in the towel... foul.
I am
I
Am
The walking stench of literal intention and the walking stench of the hands of death (clench).
Broken staff is my forgotten word thus I AM ZERO-MARK
Not the nor a or an, but and is to I am as a universe as a point of hallucination
Well... hm... I have quick question before I send this to the public.  I notice the feature of  "Save poem as (drop-down-list) either Public, Unlisted, Private, or Draft so my question is how do I get to the part of this site where, for instance, my saved poem drafts are?

I figured it out but I'm going to leave the question.
The sky is blue and so are you
The roses are all dead
She's probably off with some other toss
Giving lots of head
But don't you frown don't let me get you down
I know it's not too late
To gag her trap and stuff her gap
And put her on your plate
That girls a *** so roast her slow
Tenderize her well
Its not you to blame for her shame
She's going straight to hell
But wait a minute you're face first in it
And what is this you see?
In the womb of her ungrateful tomb
She's carried your baby
You take that child and hold him for a while
It's the blessing of a life
But you've used your fork you've used your knife you've murdered your loyal wife.
Names of affection and endearment tenderize couples with their prophecy of a life so sweet  oozes crystals of sucrose. I hope you've all brought the quintessential insulin for this ****** malady.
Baby girl, sweetheart. Who can say that to you, honeydew? He lies next to you and into your ears at night, whispers spoken in the silence of thoughts in the gradient dark.
I was given a name. It's on a certificate. I can show you. "Babe, it's okay."
"Why didn't you answer me?"
"... Huh? What? Sorry, Mom, I haven't really heard that name lately."
I had to write every day. 12 years. More. Circumventing the pale blue dashes of thin elementary parchment.
My goal at the end of first grade was to "not have loops in my d's."
And how can that be, Dear?
Avoidance is the opposite of absence, in which the avoidness is attentive and absence not able to produce a **** to give, the tattered red rag persisting to grow fonder.
An 'S is the downfall of all. mine. Yours.
"I'm so glad your mine <3"
Why am I indentured to you, only when I walk through the kitchen, can't standing to be barefoot because then only one last peg of the possessed woman chain is needed.
Not that there aren't more levels. Danti mentors. Heat lightning, electrocution- are you feeling the chemistry?
I was given skin.
Porcelain. A marble counter top. Albino creatures suffer for their melanlin-less beauty.
Is pain.
Why are purple flowers blossoming on my body that was once a temple in a garden?
My body is Detroit. Spray paint in the form of a Kaleidescapic, mountainous macabre- knuckle
avalanche going down the 90 degree angle that just isn't right but I can't call it obtuse.
I have gang signs littered across the human vessel, spotty and an embarrased brown covered by a collar, and green, yellow and maroon covered by sunglasses.
Love is not possession in the way abuse is not love.
Both own you. Sailing, he's steering. my cruise is on the Slave Trade Triangle route.
You never asked me to get your name tattooed on the past 18 years of dermis cut, shaved, kissed, caressed, burnt and brown.
That didn't stop you from placing yourself all over me, every blooming tulip as a penny for my thoughts stored on your test's word bank.
"Good" is only "not good enough"
mint condition only makes me green.
Kimberly C Brown Oct 2010
Your hands were soft
they were knowing-and
forgettable.

When my mind goes blank
I thank God
because I hate waiting for
eternity to come.

Its another day
the sun is high in its dome
and the humans make their sounds
-its loud.
I wish to crush them;
to hear their bones crack
and their tissues tenderize.
Then all the sound would echo
then ebb away.
Their would be no human noise!
and my mind could drown free.
Alan Browne Jul 2018
Being your best friend and your own worst enemy is most conflicting.
Patting yourself on the back,
Or catching yourself by the scruff of the neck.

Being happy in thy own self,
Easier said than done.

One part of you wants to move on with life,
But the other is insistent on staying in the past,
Dwelling on all the negatives,
Blocking all the positives.

Maybe the are just like political parties,
But in my head,
One being as bad as the other.

If only I could deafen my mind,
I would nt have to listen to either of them,
And all would be well with the world.

Maybe I will try that electric shock therapy,
Stick my brain in a frying pan,
Tenderize some synapses and neurons,
Or the past, present, and future.
Medium rare, a little ******, let them juices flow.

Soften the thoughts that haunt us,
That we have no control over now.
Making life flow easier,
But then again,
If i go down that road
I might not be able to taste anything at all,
Everything will be so bland.
Trials and tribulations.
Being the pepper sauce,
Unfortunately.

Oh why did we have to have free will,
Life would have been so much easier if it was all mapped out for us.
This thinking malarkey can really be too much at times,
All this contemplating, dwelling, and fretting.

Its a dogs life,
So simple, so easy
No stress or responsibilities,
And they dont lose their hair.
Mateuš Conrad Jul 2018
/             i've stopped playing the game...
  never knew, what,
                  the "game" was to begin
                with...
but... as der oll europäisch
that i am...
      american *** culture always
fascinated me...
what i encountered?
was illegal...
   but what i did? wasn't...
   the pristine monetary transparency
of consensus between
adults...
         usher in the snarling...
but... to replace prostitution -
with a striptease,
   and a pornographic **** industry?
that's like replacing psychiatry
with catholic confession booths!
how can you confine
a man's desire...
   to psychiatric, pithy,
    tongue waggling?
or ****-tease within the confines
of a striptease...
  or expect... jerking off to
a pornographic movie...
     anything short...
  of the equivalent of
   the prohibition era stipend
on curbing drunks?
bad, ******* combo...
      no one is going to visit
Amsterdam to smoke the ****...
esp. not the men...
they'll travel to Amsterdam to
****... and not bother feeling
ashamed... when a Puerto Rican
bubbly beauty says:
   i don't mind...
           well... **** me...
    so why am i expected to mind,
to reach some, "respectable"
             public consensus?
whatever is, "bad" about prostitution,
consent...
   is what has been rotting,
      imploding the thespian art...
acting...
                 and some that...
authentically take pleasure in it...
can't exactly act, or rather: fake...
an ******...
   and i've seen one example
where there is genuine pain,
translated into a hushed howling...
an ouw - that ******* version
of ouch...
                 but America can't explain
to me...
       why there's an Amsterdam...
and there is consent...
   and... even if she has a ***** stashed
in her boudoir...
you don't want to use it...
sometimes taking more lips and
tongue to meet her's...
        than actual genitals...
but...
   substituting prostitution...
with ******* and ****-tease
clubs?
   this, very American:
   mind my personal space...
no touching... mentality?
    talk to a Picasso not being able
to play with a canvas...
what will you say?
          paint me a mental picture?!
- and if you don't have
a girlfriend, as a bulgarian *******
might ask,
and you reply:
- no...
                    there is no emotional
depth to the scenario...
there is only, the supreme carnal
act...
     there is no:
let's have coffee tomorrow,
while eating croissants, talking about
the type of music we both like...
i abhor emotional puppetree -
       i'm here for the butcher's bite...
i'm here to tenderize the meat...
draw a tattoo on the soul...
to deviate from the space-temporal
constraints of relationships
and their obvious, ship, and anchor...
               money, not power,
is the only pivot
            for ****** transparency...
what she will "earn", i would have
never spent...
                  i buy time,
i don't buy a body,
  that will, remain, non-binding
        to my other "engagements"...
so yes... i'm "perverted" over details...
the scent of hair...
the eye contact...
   the antithesis of a leather belt
or leather shoes when caressing
an embodiment of in vivo...
   the naked torso,
  the lost obsession with *******...
the leg, the bulging thigh,
wrapped around my stomach...
    the interludes of silence
and absolute curiosity,
   sharing a taste in contradictory
musical tastes...
washing her body in the shower...
saying to not wanting to shower
after the hour: to retain the perfume
of her body on mine:
   like a second, or third encounter,
with a ghost...
      but... the American deviation
from prostitution...
   superseded by *******
and striptease clubs?
     bad combo...
     'look, but don't touch.
touch, but don't taste;
taste, but don't swallow
',
you already know it's about
as toxic as masculinity
could be, deprived, as it was,
in the prohibition era...
     yet men who never
entertained services of
prostitutes... will never tell you...
what's lying belly up...
moaning and groaning
on the sediment of civilization.
Skyler M Jan 2022
Here it comes now,
It's coming soon now,
Almost here now,
So it's here now.

Numbing agent to my ******* brain,
Bash my teeth into ******* pieces,
Tear my toes off their ******* hinges,
Eat my heart out it's a ******* pain.

Well it's never gonna be gone now,
Sticking around 'til I go crazy now,
Like a spider to a sticky trap now,
And now I'm going down.

Pull my nails out with pliers,
Tenderize my knees with a bat,
Feed my eyes to a starving rat,
I'm done with my body, any buyers?
Bard Feb 2021
"News"
How fun is it to stay inside your cage
Reading a script from the given page
Rot away or receive your wage
Feed off the rust and **** slave

"Factory Floors"
Wave away H2S as I asphyxiate  
Corpse still strung on by opiates
Strung out to facilitate production
Combustion, institutions, and human waste

"Hedgerows"
Trained to work tenderize the pork
Worlds burning on its axis they call that winning
Champagne uncorked to celebrate burnt pitchforks
Worlds spinning on averages call that living

"Holders"
Hate and madness marches on the enemy
The friendless say that that's a friend to me
Pain holds hands with misery forms a circle
Maintain and enter me to continue the cycle

"Paper Hands"
If you lose your will to fight then fall from the fire light
Pitch black abyss or pure white emptiness both lack sight
To and forth I vacillate from deep black to blinding light
I reject it and accept it because neither is right

"Diamonds"
Pop there goes your whole stock
The worlds leaking from its locks
As you try to cannibalize your flock
Not wolves your mocked by the sheep
beer, as i discovered, is about as crucial to marinade meat as is salt and olive oil... especially when tenderizing pork... esp pork...

now pork, i do know:
unlike chicken or beef...
only recently i found out
that a quick Turkish marinade
with some Sumac
rosemary... rosemary?!
yes: apparently beef
works just as well with rosemary
as does lamb...

i don't understand the monotheistic
**** of logic against pork
maybe all that dehydration have
those "sputnik bros"
the wrong kind of hallucinations
maybe the rest of us are
forgiving of the sand people too
much:

but sure as **** Islam wasn't born
a heritage implosion
of Judaism:
Islam was born from having
to antagonize Christianity:
in the sentiment of:
Christianity begot waging
war of images against words
and Islam was born with a reply:
to wage war with words against
images...

pork i can understand:
how to marinade the beast...
tenderize it... succumb to:
the oink and the cartilage
in hoofs in nails
in ears in tail:
the most economic animal known
to man: in terms of edibility:
which is why these sand-people
seem so strange to
be so loved up in Kentucky
bird flute playing the flu
i don't get this backwardness...
this critique of god
it's almost like a gimmick
to show god and the people befriended:
so... these lunatics do realize
that: you couldn't possible
raise a piglet farm in the desert:

they do realize that Europe
was once a forest
and uprooting trees and turning the former
forest land into arable pasture
was not exactly...
what's the word: waiting in the desert
tending to camels spitting in your eye
blah: it wasn't super easy...
and yet the pig gets the brunt of the burden
of: weird people:
super weird people...
at least the Chinese with their atheism
and a lifetime of catching up
to the European fascination with
the Egyptians: but
what other written script out of Africa?
can we be summoned to the judgement:
well in part the westerners of the continent
but are we to blame for
how loudly Nigerians speak:
simply because they had no concern
for scribbling down the sounds that they
made and conjured up letters?

ooh look at me: i'm about to google
a politically correct... for fool's gold
if i didn't come across any African alphabet
until i already bypassed hieroglyphs then
what the **** am i expecting?
ideograms? Katakana syllables?
Korean thingy-ma-jigs?

          talking to Muslims and about Pork
is a bit like...
talking to someone about arachnophobia
holding a tarantula in your hand...
talking to Jews and pork is non-essential
since those other ancient spastics of the desert
finally succumbed to some variation
of liberalism on the culinary front
and in the most extreme scenarios the ones
that still to a pork-phobia
are the inbreeding types who wrestle
with having a state:
but not making statehood crux
of military service because of: "religious studies"...

******* camel jockey pork-phobia:
so blind that they see the letters
but can't hear the sounds:
like my latest fetish for the dentist:
like: it really was the antithesis of getting
a *******
and getting trimmed by a barber:
i got all tingles...
some man: two to be exact...
putting their hands into my mouth
wearing latex gloves...
it was like the perfect anti-******* *******...
so much so that i geared up
for the event by jerking off to
some ***** flicks with pregnant women:
god i love a good video where
a pregnant woman gets pleasured:
because:
if i was in the capacity to get a woman
pregnant:
i'd like to think what my allowances were:
could i **** her with that fetus inside her
or just all oral i mean i don't know:
just wearing a ring finger makes me think
all **** thinks all things godly and forbidden
and that's not even me contemplating
hell
because that's the one place were people
are there so sadomasochistic ends meat: meet...

boo hoo...
** ** **... Santa some variant of Satan's Clause...
i just don't understand why
this special spastic treatment of people
who fear eating pork...
clearly we are not literate
but imitation monkey: clapping:
that's not reading that's not:
it's just i say yo echo! echo! echo sounds!
baritone: get back to me later...
echo pork porky porky pi in the iota of sigma kappa
gamma... since: not real why-i-y...
but there's the j... which is sort of the antonym
of the sound enshrined in Y: Jive: hive:
yew: jew...

imagining a cannibal transported to a world
of vegan fetishes:
oat milk, dairy free: not eating poultry abortions
of eggs:
no cheese: no milking of the cow:
just rubbing firmly at a cucumber
to get some motivational juices out...
getting a haircut: primal instinct...
clearly we're not literate, collectively...
just because people can do more with signature
beside an X is
algebraic proof that: but people still adhere
to stupid ordeals of time-framed intellect
of progress that worked: for a time:
but have become: outdated and: this is no way
to live: this life of antagonizing pork
because somehow you can't be
the next sheep-******* and camel jockey
Don Muhammad
with an Envy of Solomon's Harem...

               lucky for me that i started basking
in the sexuality of a post-****** creature
now i don't have to worry about
unexpected pregnancies lock-me-up Scotty... spot...
Polka: that's dot dot... dot dot dot... dot...
now i just have to worry about a prenup
and...
well i was serious:
if i'm going to test hallucinogenic mushrooms
somewhere in a field in a meadow
in a forest enclosure:
i will need to sample the anti-thesis of Dune
or Dune proper
and ingest a tapeworm...
if i'm going to test hallucinogenic mushrooms
i need to bio-hack my consciousness
and create a trinity of me:
a tapeworm and a mushroom: fungal growth
of consciousness...

i am: deadly serious...
dope state deep of: my van Gogh is getting
the proper revisionist treatment of:
2nd attempt at seriousness:
first time it was all **** naked faking...

i still don't understand this prominence of
the desert people
and the literal obliteration of the forest people
of the Amazon...
because: clearly: the Europeans were living
in an area: this readily presented as the arable
breadbasket...
chisel the African man started rapping
blah blah bli bli blue blue blood:
but!
at least he converged and living among us
started to wear our clothes
and completely obliterated the stronghold of
classical music constipation with jazz
while the Muslim did: what?

but if it's all so bad
then why live among us why attempt
to intellectually clone as
as an extension of your repertoire of red flags?
why be so adamantly critical of god:
why would god be so critical of pig
if you laugh because English
is a language of mirror: GOD with DOG
and Allah: well: not exactly
symmetrical like YHWH when you think of
it: just LLH and that looks *******
****... **** beyond hope of not looking ****...
so...

m'eh...            pork pie!

— The End —