"ripoff" poems
to my Madolyn, Rob , Soliana, Malak, Pinkpearl, Daniel, BJ, Miki, Jules, Willow, Poets Rain, Her, Ashan, Billy, Katelyn, Kirstens, Leah, Emily, Liz, Skyler, HB, Danielle, Robin, Lynnie, Veer, Abigail, and Fawn
We haven't been here long
At all
But your support has been
overwhelming
...to us at least
We haven't written masterpieces
At all
But your responses have been
overpowering
...to us at least
Know we notice you,
Know we recognize you,
and try to get to know you
through the words you present
We could never repay you
At all
But, please, don't forget
we love you
...to say the least
We are honored
We will always work to honor you
Sincerely yours,
A&T (seriously not a ripoff)
P.S.
I can't handle anymore people so you guys are going to have
to help me ****** anyone new coming over. I'll pay.
Jul 27, 2018
Jul 27, 2018 at 3:38 AM UTC
The smell of stale french fries
and E.coli coated beef
the raw onions and garlic cloves
stunk up the kitchen and watered my eyes
no ice in the drink machines...
but plenty of warm pop
Chicken nuggets with 16 new herbs
and spices and hot fudge Sundays, without the hot fudge
banana splits with rotten bananas
and the tomatoes weren't that fresh either
the cheese was moldy and the buns, moldier
The advertisements claimed "Have it your way"
it wasn't my way, it was their way
I paid a dollar fifty ordering off the dollar menu
it was a ripoff....
I spoke to the manager
and the manager spit in my face
and said "Have a nice day"
it wasn't a nice day, it wasn't a nice day at all....
Dec 30, 2015
Dec 30, 2015 at 2:45 AM UTC
I told you the carnies were ripoff artists, but If you really wanted, you could have said the real prize was the love in the air that night.
Sep 24, 2015
Sep 24, 2015 at 5:38 AM UTC
A man known as "The Master"
came to speak to our small town
He was revered as a wise man
And he always dressed in brown
He answered every question
Though his answers did confuse
He was more of a rainmaker
A charlatan, a ruse
For twenty bucks he'd let you in
To hear him speak about the world
His hair, was just a birds nest
And his beard was braided, twirled
I went to see this magii
Find out answers about life
I asked him if he knew the truth
He said, "I see you've met my wife"
I asked him what his answer meant
He said "she always asks me the same thing"
"like, when I've lost the rent"
"Master, all I want to know
Can true happiness come to man"
"If you've money, ***** and three drunk broads"
"Then son, I'd say you can"
"Master, that's not what I mean"
"Then, just why did you ask?"
"I didn't mean that happiness"
He took a sip from his small flask
I sat and looked about me
At the crowd around his feet
I was more confused than ever
And was getting dizzy from the heat
Another man stepped forward asking
"Master, tell us about love"
"didn't you read about the broads
"About thirteen lines above"
"Love..it is confusing"
"It's always different every day"
"If you want love that never changes"
"Then my boy, you'll have to pay"
"I'm not sure that's what I need"
"To hear, Is it the truth?"
"I see you've met my wife as well"
"A big girl, red head...Ruth"
"No master, I just need to know"
"Before I choose a bride"
"Well, make sure you can see the tv"
"When she's lying on her side"
"Always mark the ***** bottle"
"Just in case...you know..me thinks"
"That way, you can always prove to her"
"That you haven't had three drinks"
"Master, this is way off base"
"I think you are a fraud"
"Young man, I know of what I speak"
"I see that you don't have a broad"
He too, sat down, head spinning
The master was confusing as all hell
But, we all sat here in his presence
Under this strange man's spirit spell
"Master, I have one more thing"
"I must know before I leave"
He said" it's two doors down and to the right"
As he wiped his nose upon his sleeve
"No, not that, I don't need that"
"I just need to know what's real"
"Do I believe in all around me?
"Do I believe in what I feel?"
"Christ", he said,"you are a pain"
"I can't answer things like that"
"I just know, who won last nights game"
"Do these pants make me look fat?
"You speak to me of truth and love"
"I know of broads and trucks"
"The only truth I know is that"
"You've wasted twenty bucks"
"Master, you're a ripoff, sir"
"I guess this is a lesson in my life"
"You really do not know the truth"
"Are you sure you've not met my wife?"......
Jan 21, 2013
Jan 21, 2013 at 7:36 PM UTC
And for those of you who don’t
Find Trump to be pernicious,
He shows his *** to one and all,
I hope you find it is delicious.
For those of you who lived in
Dream castles of foolish hope
You have backed an evil man
A charlatan and a dope.
If you tried hard and long
You could not have done worse
And that is the reason for
This neener neener verse.
I can’t think how he could
Have warned you any better.
He promised things intelligence
Could discredit by the letter.
He said he would do stuff
So totally unconstitutional,
That made the rich richer,
And proved you were delusional
To trust a total ripoff guy
Who has been cheating for years.
Why did you think this fool
Would allay any of your fears?
But still you all waved high
His stupid Chinese-made hats;
Bought him gold and diamond studs
For his brand new fancy spats.
And now he’s in the Capitol
Laughing at all of you dolts
YOU gave him weapons to use on you
Instead of a thousand volts.
Mar 24, 2017
Mar 24, 2017 at 5:58 PM UTC
“I conversed with you in a dream.”
Sappho’s fragment 134
"He said 'no worries,'" she said
when she hung up. "I love when people say that." quaint little town,
they say of us – quaint little smile, I
say of her.
"When you drink, i..." another plantative little contest the context
ringing and you can tell that the "i" is not a proper noun.
"Were you alone?" it surmounts up and climbs down the treacle gavels of sensibility
this question suggests concern.
and a boy who wants to have *** with me calls me kitten. His hair is brown.
Two conversations at the same time:
"Where I'm from, twenty a gram's a ripoff!"
Standard prices.
and
"Princess, if you were my girl, you'd always walk funny."
The ice is
thin under my oxfords
the murk of my conversational devices
Lake bottom:
vices.
Mar 26, 2015
Mar 26, 2015 at 7:33 PM UTC
Shall I compare thee to a winters day?
Thou art more cold and more merciless.
Mar 6, 2015
Mar 6, 2015 at 4:57 PM UTC
I'm a neighbourhood ******
of truth, I'll inject everyone
of you,
The needle isn't contaminated
with untruths, the only thing
I inject within you is the truth..
Wannabe,
false fashion,
ripoff
that has only one place when
used up by those whispering
in ears like a messiah, of false
prophesies of riches that only
cloth the pockets of would be
rules of a patch that is never
theirs just a mirage of power..
I've been spat upon,
I have holes!
Of my consequences that others
have vented upon me from afar.
But I'm the neighbourhood
******
injecting truths, saving lives
that would be caskets
silently cried upon.
Dec 31, 2017
Dec 31, 2017 at 2:40 PM UTC
Why can't I ******* write?
I always used to be good at this;
It wasn't even any work.
The words
dripped from my
brain
And ran down my pen
to the
page
Creating a freeway of ink
For my thoughts to travel by
Along the curves and edges
of every A... B... C...
The paper was a playground
crawling with capering rhythm and
frolicking thoughts that
would romp with my emotions
the instant they ran off of my ball point black Bic...
And I've never been much for
GIMMICKS
so forgive the e. e. cummings ripoff earlier,
and for the all caps just now but
I just want to distract you from the fact that
This Is Not A Poem because
I can't think of any ******* thing to write.
Sep 13, 2010
Sep 13, 2010 at 7:13 AM UTC
Loosey goosey, Gary Busey
Makes more sense than you!
What do you see, big kaboosie?
What would Vladdy Putin do?
Fussy wussy, presidential woosy
Tell a whole buncha more lies.
Flappy ***** big **** slappy
The best your money buys.
Choppy woppy, never stoppy
Even when caught on tape.
Shouty, pouty, tough it outy
Completely out of shape.
Fleecer, squeezer, ugely obese
Shadow of your youth
Ripoff, tipoff, always lipoff.
Incapable of truth.
Heapy cheapy, never sleepy
Won’t pay your own bills.
Brainless pain, runaway train,
All your ideas can ****
Neego, peego, bloated ego
The little kids you scare,
Shard, pard, big tub of lard,
As attractive as your hair.
Apr 5, 2018
Apr 5, 2018 at 9:15 PM UTC
Wimps, whiners and data miners.
All gathered here together.
Crooks, embezzlers and free ***** guzzlers
And hookers dressed in leather.
Lying, cheating and some **** beating
And even some ****** games.
Walls at borders and restraining orders
And finding others to blame.
Cheaters, beaters and lying pig-men
Trying their best to succeed
In the race for worst ******* of them all.
One more ripoff is all they need.
Blaming, shaming and gerrymandering
Doing their best to become
Millionaires, billionaires, zillionaires
Ruling absolutely over the dumb.
Mewling, puking and crying out loud
Losing stolen funds they invested.
Society defeafened from applause and hurrahs
When the lot of them are arrested.
Ripping, tearing their thousand dollar suits;
Begging their thousand year old God.
They’re the twenty first century Washington batch
Of Wynken, Blynken and Nod.
Mar 22, 2018
Mar 22, 2018 at 3:04 PM UTC
You found us
Read us
Thought us worth your time
Liked us
Loved us
Didn't mind the lack of rhyme
We saw you
Read you
Thought your beauty shines
We like you
We love you
Endearing are your chimes
All you ten
To each
One by one
Warm thanks to all of you
All ten of you
With love,
A&T's poems (not a ripoff telecom company)
Jul 22, 2018
Jul 22, 2018 at 5:27 PM UTC
All men have secrets
And here is mine,
So let it be known, on the eve of my impending doom
I listen to the songs that reflect my life
And I thought, I was going to make it, and break it
BUT
My life was nothing more than a tease, to torment and tantalize
See the life I have had would make a good man turn bad.
And there was a hand that rocked that cradle and it could have been mine
This gave me comfort you would not understand.
However, that night opened my eyes and I will never sleep again
That dream is gone, I did a good thing
She could have been a poet or a fool, I did a bad thing.
And I am not happy and I am not sad!
There is no one left to blame but myself,
And I know time is against me now.
Now I am so tired and I want to go to bed
Please don’t try to wake me in the morning I hope I will be gone.
Don’t feel bad for me I want you to know.
Deep in the cell of my heart I will feel so glad to go.
These words I sung and thought when I was young
Good times I might have had
Are not the times of this current man!
I haven’t had a dream in a long time
So, for once in my life let me get what I want
Lord knows it would be the first time
It’s so easy to laugh and hate,
It take strength to be gentle and kind
Love is natural and real, but not for me
Not for me.
I was never meant to be here anyway.
It’s too close to home and too close to the bone
I never felt comfortable in this world anyway.
Still I cling
See the sea wants to take me the night wants to slit me.
Can anyone help me?
No.
See I know it’s over
I know it’s over, and it really NEVER began, but in my heart it was so real
I wonder will you hear me when I sleep
Will you see me when I pass?
This is the last stand of all I am.
This is your world not mine.
Please keep me in mind
There is a better world
Oh, I hope so
Oh, there must be.
So, sing me to sleep, please sing me to sleep.
Deep in the cell of my heart I really want to go….
Jan 23, 2015
Jan 23, 2015 at 3:12 AM UTC
what does it all mean?
please can I get a ticket?
to ride your new machine?
postscript ; they were all eaten by the big poetry ripoff before the machine
made out of cardboard left the planet. RIP Confused dead poets blasted into the evaporating nothingness.
Oct 25, 2016
Oct 25, 2016 at 5:45 PM UTC