As I ran down the stone path
The cold snowy ground below me
The snow storm raging above me
I couldn't help but save them
I had to help Annie Janna Billy and the families Saint Bernard JoJo
To the family car
Not my family but theirs
As we heard the sirens from over yonder
JoJo barked
Shhhh's filled the night
I drove as fast as I could
While Annie sat beside me with a horrified expression
While Janna wept
While Billy tried to keep JoJo quite
While JoJo snuggled into the young boy for warmth
I turned on the heat but the car wasn't getting warm
It's an old car
It takes too much time
Not that we had any
They would already be at the house
Burning it most likely
Can't have a house that my kind have used
To them
We were a disease that needed to die
Those *******
As I made a sharp turn
----------------------------------------------------
I gasped for breath, shirtless sweaty and in tears. Freezing cold from my fan blowing on me. Who were they?

urgot, u big oaf
do u want to eat another bread loaf?
ur just so fat
i hope ur not a democrat
because this spider
might cryder
if u dont hug janna
with a bannana
soraka is now sad
and that is bad
league of legends is gay
but we play every day

One of these
days I'll forget
how your name
numbs my tongue.

But not today.
Today your name
is hot poisonous
gas trapped in
my ribcage.
Today you
are steam burning
my throat
screaming
"Oh god!"
"Oh god!"
"Oh god!:
because you
are going to
be my
shadow again.

You are going to
be everywhere
again.

I keep
having these
flashbacks
of when I
was choking
on my words
as you held me
down.
Of when
he held up
the camera
and you bent
me over the
couch and
You both
laughed as
I giggled and
whispered "stop please"
instead of screaming
because my mother
was upstairs.
When me saying
"I'm done. No seriously
stop."
turning into your wicked
grins in your rotc
uniforms
pointing at your badges
"we're higher ranked
than you. You aren't
done yet." and that...
******* camera.

Always threatening
to **** yourself
when I did "wrong".
Always threatening-
Always
threatening me.

I was your puppet
and when
I spoke for myself.
another threat.
I got rid of you.
But you dug a hole
under my skin and
crawled right back in.
Shot me in the head
and like a maggot
crawled into my
Broca's area
controlling what I
said.

It got worse.
You were *******
other girls.
I got rid of
you again.
You acted like
we were wolves.
But I heard they
mate for life.
I heard they're loyal.

You my sweet,
are just a worm.

Saying you love me
promising you love
me.
And then texting another
girl the same thing
as you're whispering it
into my ear.

I pushed.
I pushed.
I pushed.
You were a
concrete wall.
A snapped spinal
cord between a
paralyzed man
and using his legs again.
The emphysema
that keeps a
person from breathing.
You were a disease.

And just like brain cancer
you deteriorated me
and controlled me.

For 2 months
you were everywhere.
For 2 months you
were always the
ghost around the
next corner.
You followed me...
Everywhere.
Showing up outside
my house to walk me
to school.
Showing up outside
my classes to tell me
you loved me and hated
me at the same time.

Every time I pushed,
you threatened.
Always another suicide
attempt as I tried to
get out of the grave
you put me in.
You kept throwing dirt
on me and saying "I can
finally breathe!"

I remember that one day,
your hands were ******.
Glass was everywhere.
Your pocket rattled.
My name engraved on
your thigh.
"Janna this blood
is your fault" as it
ran down your leg.
You stuffed pills
into your mouth,
pushed me away
as I screamed
and clawed at your
throat trying to
get them out.

Next time.
More blood,
less pills,
but you were
dizzy, delirious,
saying you love
me, saying goodbye,
throwing up, saying
goodbye, resisting my help,
your hands looked miles away
which is probably why
for once you didn't touch me.

It's taken me
2 months
to realize the
leaves moving
behind me weren't
you running for me.
2 months to realize
the person behind me
isn't going to capture
me and keep me locked up.

You're back from the
mental asylum.
And just the thought
of your brown eyes
breaks down what ever
recovery I built up.

You are an atomic bomb.
And I'm not sure there's
ever going to be a day
where I don't tremble
at the thought of you.
  And if there is, then
  it is not today.

Have you ever dreamt of something but you woke up before you knew exactly what was going on?
That's what happened to me during the "Annie Janna Billy JoJo" dream. And it pains me so much because I really miss those kids, I mean they don't exist and their not my kids or siblings but yet I miss them so much and it hurts me because I knew they were in danger so I had to save them but I didn't know what the danger was or who it was. The worst part is, I can still see the brown haired girl in a panicked state sitting next to me, and I could hear her sister sobbing and a young boy telling his dog that its alright even though it wasn't, I don't know why but it wasn't! They didn't want those beautiful kids alive, and I don't know who wanted them dead or why and it makes me hurt inside!

What I'm ranting about: below
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/775362/wake-up/

Where are you?
Why did you leave me?
You know now I'm blue
with pain in my heart
pain that feels we're apart
Pain in my head, my body, my mind
Can't you feel to send me a sign.  
I miss our love only me and you knew,
I miss the things you said and would do.
The sparkle of your eyes , deep look you
would dart
It clung to my Soul and my heart, YES! my heart
I miss you and I know you miss me
But you made this move, do you not agree?
I would of been against it,
I would of fought a fight,
I would of held on to you more tighter than tight.
If I knew this would happen and I somehow lose
you,
Cause the shock is real,  I did not have a clue.
I would of held you tighter, smiled till my lips would shake,
I would of made life more a party, like everyday ice cream
and cake.
I would of shined more and listened more and went out of my way
To make you see differently and,  JUST STAY! STAY! STAY!!
I hope that you see my writings and how much it makes my heart
hiccup and hiss.
Or maybe just  holding off because its hard for you too
Maybe it was even harder for you and that's why there was no follow thru.
All I know is that you are gone and see only memories in my mind or from a photograph,
But I'm telling you my darling, I would give millions just to hear you laugh!
Millions to see you one more time in my journey until it is my end,
Be still my heart, and YES my darling, we definitely will meet again!.

written with love
by Janna Lee

Peace and Love
Janna ....of course...xoxoxoox loolol