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 Jun 2017 Victoria Laws
ashley
at 4:14 am
im still wide awake
imagining your body on top of mine
captivating me,
your large hands running down my fragile, tiny body,
claiming everything you brush as "yours".
at 4:20 am im still awake,
imagining myself on all fours,
your hand grasping my hair,
pulling it into that tight ponytail i wear during the day,
while you're telling me about how you could never resist me,baby. your words alone leaving me drenched and ready for you.
it's 4:30 am, and texting you:
"are you awake?"
 Jun 2017 Victoria Laws
Shanath
I am done,
I came crashing down
Like a thousand light bulbs
fitted too tight on high ceilings.

I flickered minutely
In the last hours
And then you ignored me
An anomaly that can't be fixed.

I crackled inside
Heat burning the glass,
You wanted me to light
Up your world, but I burned.

But trust me
I would have glowed
And shone bright but sorry,
I swear I'ld be among the stars.

But I wasn't
Instead I lay on
The floor that you swept,
And I was done, unfinished my
                                                    
Purpose.
Words are failing me
Or maybe I am failing them.
How do I explain
I am unworthy?
 Jun 2017 Victoria Laws
aa
how many
 Jun 2017 Victoria Laws
aa
how many hearts
have i broken
because of
my bitterness?

how many soul
have i destroyed
because of
my vengeance?

how many
relationships
have i crushed
because of
my belief
that no one
genuinely
likes me
for who i am?
"sorry i can be so blind" - Halsey
 Jun 2017 Victoria Laws
Nathan
Heartache hurts
You taught me that
When you tore my heart in half
Now your heart is breaking


What a shame
There's a silence between us
unspoken of
a void,
if I dare say.

There are times
we may be close
but we are more unknown
to each other
than we really think.

Friend,
why are you so distant?
I understand
that you understand
that people come and go

But
why push me away?
I want to say
that it's okay
for longer
I want to stay.

I understand
that you're use to losing people
and you're no longer afraid
should I leave you.

True,
I do not know what goes on
in the depths of your mind
in the abyss of this great sea.

I do not know
the battles you've faced
the demons you have fought
the nightmares that choke
the reality out of you.

I may not know
what it feels like
to have severe anxiety,
to have panic attacks every once in a while,
to have social problems,
the list will go on...

I may not know everything about you
But I know this:
you are the most honest person
I have ever met.
And this honesty,
honestly, I must say,
It is bittersweet.

Truth be told,
I may not like everything you say
But I accept it.

Because,
What is truth if it doesn't hurt?

I don't know
why you are silent.
Maybe you figured,
without me
or anybody for that matter
that you'll be strong.

Don't get me wrong,
I know you are strong.
But you are also wrong
about one thing.

You may think I will leave you
Maybe, but still
not immediately
not yet.

I will keep waiting
right here, if you need a friend.
If time should separate us,
or you push me away and grow cold,
I'll still be here.

I'll still be
your friend.
I'm still here.
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