I knock on the door
You dont let me in
Praying you will accept me
You chose to Reject Me
(Is that love?)
Change after change
I am still not enough  
You treat me like a useless puppet
You throw me away
(is that love?)
Daddy daddy
Stranger stranger
For God has given me to you
For thou has “cursed” you  
I ask for love
You give me Pain
I ask for your presence
You hand me resentment on a silver platter
Daddy Daddy
Is that love?

What is my faith
My faith is my identity
Something that takes ahold of me
My anchor
My anchor is what keeps me still when the storms come by
The anchor that holds me gives me confidence to stand
The anchor that keeps my life still is now gone
No anchors hold me
Faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance of what we do not see
Well this faith of mine is my anchor
But is my faith my anchor if  i do not hope for it or believe it is there
Did someone steal it or did i just let go
When the storms come
They come like angry winds with salty cries
They scare me
But the anchor i depended on to save me i let go of
Faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance of what we do not see
Where did my anchor go

8 letters
3 words

Little girl
Optimistic in life
Lost
Little girl
Naive as can be to the cruelty of the world
Little girl
Aspires to be what she is told
Little girl
Through her eyes she sees
Rainbows butterflies and unicorns
Little girl
No longer little
Big girl, all grown up
What does she now know
Nothing

Sadness
An empty and physical being
It chokes her while letting her breathe
But when she goes for that breath
Her hearts aches with pain
That pain she feels
Is a result of her own judgemental insecurities
And The shameful lies that surround her
She asks herself why
Her smooth dark skin asks why
As The pure silver blade cuts through her skin like butter
the crimson blood seeps from the thin open slits in her wrist
The feeling that fills her heart is no long pain
But crimson red guilt and resentment
a new form of herself emerges
Like the open sea she is filled with dirt but all she sees is the purest blue
She tells herself she is okay
She tells her mind she is okay
Her friends fawn over her contagious laughter
that fills a room like a strand of golden sunlight
But little do they know she is infected with a parasite  
That causes her to exchange her own blood for happiness
Sadness
An empty and physical being
It chokes her while letting her breathe
But when she goes for that breath
Her hearts aches with pain
Sadness

My thoughts tucked away in the deepest part of my mind
My mouth sewn together by my unspoken thoughts
As I open my mouth blood seeps from the stitches that hold my mouth closed
I mumble I mumble
Praying someone will hear me
But the mumbles are my words that no one will ever hear
Why can’t you hear me
Why can’t they hear me
My voice
my power
striped away by the silencer
I mumble I mumble
Why can’t you hear me?

I am trapped in a square
4 corners
each pointing in different directions
my square holds my tears
my disappointments
my i cants
i am trapped
as my tears drown me
they overcome my square
my disappointments taunt me
while my i cants continue to define me