I was with you in your pain
I was with you in your heartbreak
I was with you in your sorrow
But I guess I'm just a caretaker

I brought you joy in your gloom
I brought you hope in your dark hole
I brought you comfort in your anguish
Yet, I'm just a caretaker

Now he's back, picking up from where he left off
Now he's back, seeing you at your best
Now he's back to make you his
I guess I'm just a caretaker

When he goes, I'll be here to wipe your tears
When he goes, I'll be here to hold you up.
When he goes, I'll be here to make you smile again.
Yes, I'm just the caretaker

I need to say something I’d rather not have to say
But there is a bed I have made and now I must lay
you shouldn’t have to know
But I’m gonna say no
I really hope our friendship won’t have to pay.....

i was speaking to him about how i felt about him i noticed something. my heart was slowly breaking.
the words he was saying was  slowly fading. My heart rate was slowing.
the air was bitter and cold  just after it was warm and sweet.
For the words you just said. "i am sorry i cannot date you but we can be friends" came from your lips that fading from your beautiful smile of yours.
who knew that those words could hurt in less than a heartbeat.  My heart has finally broken but in time it will try and re-heal. for love is never ending and i will find the boy who is rightfully mine to love. so i hold a brave face and hide my tears for you are not my lover to love.
when you walk away i shall stay strong and hold on. for the sound of rejection is only the beginning of heartbreak so until my heart has found love.
you are not my friend nor my enemy.
my lover nor hater.
my death nor reborn.
art nor junk.
you are just a person to me and a person you shall stay. As you have done to me i shall do the same.
you may not love me and that's fine.
i shall respect your love for someone else.
just know that when you near and every time i see you.
My heart and soul dies a little inside for you could not be mine.

Zoned in traffic,
alone with the greatest hits of the 90s,
going 25 when I want to be going 90.
It's a two way repeat most days of the week,
and an unfulfilling repeat at that.
Back-tracking would hardly remedy.

Peddling into old things.

I’m not sure
but sometimes
I’d rather be zoned,
just to feel like an ice cream cone
cold, down to the bone,
chill to the taste.
Ice cream isn’t a waste.

She won again!
This time, I was going to fight back. I was determined to speak my mind.
It was like a tennis match, where I was being served aces and smashes.
It was too much and I knew she was enjoying it.
My mother left the room and I immediately felt a combination of frustration and hopelessness hover over me.
What is the point!
I felt a burning sensation as the tears came closer to the surface, but I managed to hold them back.
Instead I put my ear phones in and zoned out.
Just another day with mom!