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Viseract Apr 2019
There were times in my life
Where I was satisfied with the world
Now it’s different
Because all it seems to give me is hurt

A void in my chest,
Filled with nothing but emptiness
The same sensation I feel when I’m asleep
Or when I try to rest

It’s hard feeling positive when this life’s against you
It seems all it wants to do is grind you up, best you, bless you,
You’re probably far better off
Got the dreams and inspiration that keep you going and you can’t stop

So don’t
Don’t ever lose your faith
Because when you do you start to question
Your position in the human race

What am I good for,
Am I just for entertainment?
If that’s so, then why the
Element of overwhelming sadness?

I’m not scared, in fact,
Far from it
But it’s just sometimes I struggle
To cope with this ****

I deal with it alone
Gunslinging my way through
Drawing pistols, shots firing
Not enough bullets and I’m *******

I tried pistol-whipping my problems
But I couldn’t
If you’re down on your defenses then
You probably shouldn’t

Call for backup and extra munition
Do it quick and do it soon
Because I left it far too late
And sometimes I feel like I’m doomed

I hate feeling so down
But it’s all I have, a shroud around
Someone who questionably doesn’t deserve
To feel a pain so hard, to be quite so hurt

To feel this **** mad, or to be this **** sad
Is the one consistent thing in life that I’ve ever had
It makes me stop at times, and question my existence
But if this happens to you, shrug it off, be strong in your persistence

Talking helps to solve things
It helps to make me feel pure
It makes me feel good then
Doesn’t last long, it’s no cure

I do try to make it work,
But negativity puts in twice the effort
I was never positive to begin with
So I get twice the hurt

Sadness I can deal with
Because I can make it fade
All I need is a good song
On a cloudy, rainy day

I sing along to sad tunes
And let myself cry it all out
Afterwards I feel a bit better
And my eyes are in drought

So I go outside and smack my bag
The punching bag I have
I like to picture hated faces
When I’m feeling mad

I frame them for my anger
Because they made me go deeply through
And I hate being mad, I’d rather be sad
Is it the same for you?

I called out for help, took half a year to get
But better late than never whenever I feel really upset
I just write a little rhyme, a crazy song a bit like this
It helps at times when I look back and strongly reminisce

Other times it makes it worse, some things you should forget
And when I look back on them I drown in my regret
Some things I should’ve said, others maybe not
But at least I’m not like my other friends who blaze it away with ***

****, where’d that come from?
A well deep down that holds all the **** in this world that I know is wrong?
Sometimes I think that maybe I’m floating at the top
But my psychologist doesn’t agree, whenever I say that she makes me stop

It’s only a voice called Nightmare, my persistent inner critic
Who criticizes my every move, likes to make me feel like ****
He feeds off it, an inner demon set to self-destruct
Telling me everything I do is wrong, that it’s not just the world that’s ******

And I listen, but why should I?
When he asks me to Google tying nooses so I can just ******* die
And it’s only because, sometimes I feel I want to
But don’t listen to these voices, don’t want this to happen to you

I wanna write a goodbye letter sometime, just to have it there
Because if there’s something that makes me scared it’s seeing a loved one’s tear
So if I’m not there, perhaps it’ll make me feel better
I get told I can’t die, but never say never

Humanity has mortality and a lack of morality
Perhaps we all crazy too, insufficient in sanity
But just know, no matter what happens to us all it’s still reality
And you should always see the best in whatever is happening

I know I can’t, or at least I can’t yet
Those things I mentioned before, that drown me in regret?
That’s a part of my world, a part of my experience
**** it, what I’m saying is this **** is our existence

I hate feeling so down
But it’s all I have, a shroud around
Someone who questionably doesn’t deserve
To feel a pain so hard, to be quite so hurt

To feel this **** mad, or to be this **** sad
Is the one consistent thing in life that I’ve ever had
It makes me stop at times, and question my existence
But if this happens to you, shrug it off, be strong in your persistence

I hate my Dad sometimes, he makes me really ******
He has PTSD, takes it out on me and gets away with it
I mean, my step mum moved out, she saw it happen clearly
Did anybody stop and take time to perhaps think of me?

No? Just another waste of time?
A bad investment, a depression that took form and left its basement?
**** it all, I never helped anyone
That’s Nightmare for you, I listen to him when I write songs

He gives me inspiration in a way I guess I feed off him
But it can be difficult sometimes, to let him loose because he slips
Up and takes me down, ironically it’s why I’m writing now
To show you all that if you hear him, don’t listen to the sound

Of a desperate voice in desperate times, let him just die
Don’t even try to talk to him, give up let him cry
Don’t feel bad afterwards, it isn’t ******
It’s survival of the fittest and he’ll eventually wanna hurt her

You got a special someone don’t you? He wants their soul
He will play any card to get a chance to devour them whole
So don’t stop, keep your dreams
And let those pesky Nightmares slip by unseen

I hate feeling so down
But it’s all I have, a shroud around
Someone who questionably doesn’t deserve
To feel a pain so hard, to be quite so hurt

To feel this **** mad, or to be this **** sad
Is the one consistent thing in life that I’ve ever had
It makes me stop at times, and question my existence
But if this happens to you, shrug it off, be strong in your persistence

It may make you stop at times, and question your existence
But if this should happen to you, move along, be strong in your persistence

Where I can't
wrote this back in high school, for an album I wanted to make called Unlucky 8
Viseract Apr 2019
I'm a flesh addict, sporadic, adrenaline, I love being alive
Feel my muscles pumping blood as I run reckless- overdrive
And I cannot wait for the day, I get to say, I had the strength to survive
Like alliteration of insanity, inside of me, I to I!

But my eyes would be deceived if I said I see life like it's perfect
Like a roller-coaster, going through the motions, twists and turns a better way to word it
Take a seat, and sit with me, maybe then we'll be, like minded
Instead of you, like a lost moose, in the headlights: blind sided

I hate pretending, so, here's my raw aggression
I would take a second, to ******* bash your head in
But I don't wanna get physical, with someone so pitiful
Let's just keep it minimal, and indulge the lyrical

On sighting you I feel ******
Pity, anger, and anguish
Bullied by this *****
A year my senior, having kids

I feel hollow like a steel pipe, hurting like a rough night
I pull my smile too tight, to the point I'm  showing pearly whites
My mindset like, dynamite, my rhymes like, to takes lives,
Like a steak knife I'll carve you up
Eat these bullets, desperate lunch!

Now make no mistake
I sharpen dull blades
And I get carried away
******, serial, and maim

Just crunching numbers okay?
Nothing has changed
You're still the same old, same old
Here we go, another bomb falls!

Just an organic robot, blowing off steam
Of flesh and metal, robotic zombie
I see the cogs and the gears but I don't see a spirit
All I see is sheeple living lives like corporate business

Where's the fun in this? Leech the Government
Have a couple kids, and some funding with
A faded side *****, drugs kicking in
Go party hard with all your fake friends

You are not a parent, just a pa for rent
She is not a mother, just another chick
Using all that money to hit another fix
Coz you ain't cool if you ain't staying lit!

And that's just how it is, juvy and pregnant kids
People telling other people that their life's ****
Graffiti tags and spit, violence just a bit
Lost dreams and broken bottles, vanished innocence...
Lazy take advantage of a system meant for real struggles that can't be avoided...
Viseract Apr 2019
I'm sitting, on my bed, I just woke up
Have to turn off my alarm, already stressed enough
I take it, feel the horrid taste in my mouth
As I make it drown, with the water that last night I left out

Flushed down, it should hold any second
I take a breath and
Ask myself the burning question...
Why the **** am I depressed then?

Flashbacks to times I couldn't sleep
Crying to myself, why the **** is it I feel weak?
Why the **** is it me? Why do I feel empty?
Hollow hearted, where has it departed, I feel so lonely!

Gaps in my memory and gaps in its effectiveness
I still wear a smile just to feel like I'm rejecting it
Placebo effect and pretend that I'm still proud of me
But see this shrouding me? You're **** right you should've doubted me!

Fifteen minutes of reminding myself I'm nobody special
It feels like ten years on Death Row
Berating myself, why aren't I better, why can't you hold hope?
A vicious cycle on a motorcycle, kick the chair and let go!

I still have thoughts of suicide
In the short time it takes for me to find my lifeline
Here it comes, thanks for the pickup
The only time I can say I'm thankful that I took drugs
Viseract Oct 2018
People say I'm intense and aggressive
Not camping, just scampering, rampant
I'm too quick to take care and I'm helping
The message is hell bent on answering
All of your questions so let up the pressure!

Chat, chat, chat and you think you're all that
Talk some smack just so you can get back
Launch an attack on the boy in black
That boy so sad he makes me mad
That boy is trash have you seen his raps?
He's so **** suss I really wanna clap
Left right, goodnight, put him in the spotlight
And scrutinise like I have that right

Aye, I bet you think you know me
When all you've seen is nothing really
Yeah, bet it turns you green
To know that I'm better than what you carelessly,
Push away, in rage, that's cute, so sweet
When you stay, enraged, by your own heartbeat.
When you fake til you make and that's why you grin
Guess you don't know that to lie is to sin

Yeah I was the kid who got left out and yes I was the kid who'd always doubt
I was the kid who had no friends and I was the kid who'd get left til the end
Chosen for games as the last called name,
If I couldnt be avoided like I carried black plague,
But look at me now, I stand so proud, and if you try to take this from me I will knock you down!

I bring the rain and you brought pain
So I gave it back like, keep the change
Hate it when you take it
Hypocritically making
Bad choices lately, despise me for saying

So you sneak like a snake and talk behind my back
But it never really cut me so I wouldn't say backstabbed
You never really mattered so I'll be fine
You can drown in your ball pit of lies

While I raise the storm and I right the wrong
While I pave the way and still remain calm
The black dog follows and hounds at my feet
But I am electric you can't bite me!


You could call me Zeus I'm lightning when I move


I'm a Godlike youth that you dream to pursue

Bolt from the clouds comes crashing down
Charging the air like a love affair
Handle with care? I was kicked down the stairs
They called me Zaps so be aware!

That's spaz backwards! Ha! So funny
Now that I'm electric I guess it means something
Now that I write hectic I guess it means cunning
Yeah I'm spastic with my bars but I'm shocking and I'm stunning

You wish you had the talent to grasp words with magnets
And have the power to change the charge like its only magic
And link negative to its own, and vice versa
Take a slasher of a song and make verbal ******

Call out the curses, fill them with hurt and close all your curtains, the sunlight is burning

Go outside and raise your head to the sky
Dark clouds race to claim it all as mine!


Was the reject now I'm relevant

Yeah, Stormbringer

It's no dead ringer I was always a winner

Call me a sinner, I eat y'all for dinner
Those who call me a quitter, make claims that I never
Will get any better, when I'm rising forever
When I'm using my head and I'm light as a feather

I told you my name, don't use it in vain,
I gave you my hand, you can't do the same
So trust is reversed and storms start to churn
When I raise my voice it's a third degree burn!

I gave it non-stop what more could you want
When voices persist I'm getting *******
Continual fights and TV highlights
It took me a while but now I realise

Now I realise,
Now I realise!

I'm the Stormbringer....

Stormbringer, your head's like a spinner
Gasping for air, I crushed your throat from a distance, so killer, killer, killer...

Killer, killer, killer...

I shout out and you twirl around
Rotating one-eighty like you're an owl
You look at me foul like a fowl out of bounds so
This is just something for which you're renowned
Back in the day when you used to clown
Now that I'm clowning you're the one running around
What have I done? This isn't fun!
Come at me strong, or come at me none

Back in your cage, the one that you made when you went insane and told me to stay,
Never have I ever followed in your ways
Never would I ever listen to you persuade

You'd need some skill, and not fumble your speech
I've seen examples, week after week
Calling me out saying that I'm a creep
When I used to feel to get by I must sneak

Now the tides turned, I'm friends with Poseidon
I'm a demigod and you're just a pirate
Plundering the ***** of your best mates
What? You don't like the **** I say?


But I am no fraud
I am my own mob
I'm raising my head,
To inflict what I got!
Viseract Aug 2018
How should I begin this, declaring my regret?
Cursing all the times that I had wished we never met?
Or maybe I should just proclaim my anguish and my sorrow
That I had not forseen, that we would not quite make tomorrow

And I'm sorry for the fact that I decided I could show
The parts of me I stowed away, the seeds I've allowed to grow
The parts of me unknown to most because it claims to hold
The part of my subconscious which would like to be known

I hate it how I used you, when I didn't ******* mean to
And I hate the way I got excited to even slightly sense you
I hate the path we walk, and I hate the way we talk,
And most of all I hate myself for letting that go

I loathe the way I claim to be so happily open minded
But can't accept when I've truly ****** it
Can't accept when I've finally lost it

Hate the memories that you conjure over my face
Like the way that I act, is the bitterness that you taste

And the part that gets me most, is how I thought you could trust
But how can one bestow a faith to a monster, so ******
Im divided by the sight of my own face in the ******* mirror
I open my mouth and silently scream like I'm scared to ******* hear it

Scared of myself, so why the **** do I care?
That when I say I'm demonic, that you'd be ******* scared?
One plus one is two for you and two for me as well
So I guess I'm asking for a second chance, to be the better Hell

Everybody has potential, so don't connect the dots
I am not the one you knew before in all his tempest, lost
I am not someone you know, despite the weight I tow
The recognition of my pain, and I know you think you know

But you don't, because here I am not so long after
Proclaiming all was over like a town shred by disaster
Destruction may be caused, and distrust where I never was,
But even nature overgrows the bombs we throw, we fly, we let go

Even friendship overthrows the venom I caused...

I'm sorry... just let me try my hand
You don't need to trust me, coz I already understand
You got skeletons in a closet, and I'm a high pressure faucet,
And I'll be waiting right here because I know I can't force it...
I suppose there's not much more to say, other than I miss you and I wish that I had stayed, but it's up to you I guess... Am I solid or will I fade? I regret the **** I said, I didn't listen to what you said...
Viseract Aug 2018
It's like you see beyond the glimmer in my eyes
It's like you're able to look right through my faulty smile
It's like you see right past the parts of a different time
It's like you gaze into the depths and see two of a kind

It's like I seem to be to you as clear as the sky
Whenever you can't see a ******* cloud on the horizon, why?
You see the good intentions and you see the wicked ways
The water on the surface and the Devils own blaze!

I'm the master of my fate, I am not the beast in me!
I will not succumb, not be numb, to your ******* greed!
I will stay afloat, in the tides of misery!
I will make my way, and you will not **** me!

The jester we are one, the good and bad combined!
We live to entertain, but it's myself that I provide!
Laughing in despair, head lowered in pride
A contradictory conflict, and you see it in my eyes...

It's like you see beyond, the glimmer in my eyes
It's like you're able to look right through my faulty smile
It's like you see right past the mask behind which we will hide
It's like you gaze into the depths and see our dead divide...
Viseract Aug 2018
If I'd a dime for every rhyme
That popped inside my head
Wishing plague and misery
To **** what is already dead

Then perhaps some day, should I have my way
I'd bring silence to the lambs
**** it's bleating, end it's breathing
And let me rest amongst the ******

We cursed few do mock the blessed
We dance on your very grave
If only you saw perspective
You'd know there's none to save!

Time, time and time again
You promised to make change
And now my mind won't SHUT UP
It knows that I'm to blame!

I did this, I did that
I know what wicked ends
Have forged the stage of sorrows
That gave you all there was left

With piggy eyes and snuffling pride
Your wretched filth, and life
Have tempted fate, as of late
Now scream, pig, and die...
Viseract Jul 2018
A lover's kiss, such tender lips,
Run chills along my spine
So warmhearted, never be parted,
My soul, far from divine

She loves me so, I look to her
The tigress with purr content
This battle scarred, jaw marked
Wolf returns what's sent


— The End —