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How can you possibly be so angry
At someone you love so dearly?
Or rather, how could your life get shattered
By someone you trusted completely?
Isn't it a funny feeling; guilt
And the things we feel it for

I'm not sure which is harder; being unloved
Or being taught love is what it isn't

But both leave you robbed

And angry.

"
It took me two decades to understand,
You never knew how;
Yours came with strings of compliance attached

And obligatory love is a **** poor excuse for it.

"
I left, I left
And still the guilt came;

That unwanted visitor who refuses to leave.
pg. 40 from my poetry book, Biting Thorns Off Roses
Nana Apr 2
Three years ago from today,
I watched your neck snap and
swing loosely from your spine
from a tightly tied noose,
like the detached sole of
your brown church loafers.

During the autumn, the leaves
that ripped new orange contrasted
from the purple observable on your
face.

I watched your body dangle
from the banyan tree next
to the rickety tire swing in which
was once a steady structure, but was
now so close to dilapidation, just
like you and mama’s marriage.

And oh how you always hit her with
the tea kettle at eight in the morning
while it was still hot brewing of
mysterious faucet liquid because
your farm couldn't pay for plumbing,

And oh how while mama was away and
little Josh played cars with Susie
I watched your neck swing and twirl,
and finally breathed.

But after three years ago,
I watched mama walk down
a carmine carpet, her
white mermaid tail wedding
dress complimented the
beautiful chrysanthemums
among the ground.

I watched salty rivers dangle from
her eyes like you neck to your spine,
not from a beating of hot medal
at eight in the morning, but of
the tan man, Jose, who we all
loved dearly, not because of the
new plumbing and tire swing that he
provided, but because we saw mama
smile and dance and laugh for the first
time, since three years ago from today.
Lance Remir Apr 1
When we crossed paths again
The only intimacy that was shared
Were our shadows overlapping
And even then
Yours was the first to leave
My frame is decaying, even faster when I stand.
A house, and I’m haunted, on hope’s burial land.
My windows, hollowed eyes that do nothing but stare,
At a world that shunned one with a life meant to bare.

These floorboards that shriek, are like my mournful cries,
As serpent-like phantoms shed skin and pass by.
Warm words that were etched in the walls are now cold,
Just echoes of a story that will never be told.

The clocks restless ticking, its echoes, they scream.
If only to remind me that I’ve shattered, like dreams.
My will to live was buried long ago under a promise.
These cobwebs were spun, only to trap any solace.

-“Oh, cursed soul,” a ghost haunts as I weep,
“Do you feel my icy grip as you’re failing to sleep?

I’ve watched as you wander these fated terrains.
I have hollowed your heart; I will empty your veins.”

- “Forget now, the warmth that ignited your soul.
What you thought you could hold; I have made to turn cold.”

- These words no one hears, they disturb my fraught mind.
As my black stricken eyes pierce the void till I’m blind.

- “Awaken, child unwanted!” he pleads through the dust.
“Once I’m fed from your essence, you will finally rust.”

- Those words make a promise, my hopeless future forms.
Reassurance that the curse set for me has been born.

There’s a cold empty room, where my hopes should reside.
Shattered mirrors hold proof, that my dreams have since died.
A vibrant tapestry now sways, ripped in the wind,
Whispering of lost motives to a life that wants to end.

The doors are creaking open, letting in all I fear.
My tormented nightmares are all that is clear.
In every shadowed corner my demons reside.
If only to remind me, I’m imprisoned here inside.
Skye Apr 1
I don't know.
I don't know what to write what to say how to say it how to be.
I have ideas.
I have people I could talk to about it.
I have it but I can't use it.
I could but that means opening up...
Opening up about something deep inside of me...
Opening up about my biggest burden...
Opening up about something hurtful...
Opening up about something I kept hidden...
Opening up about something buried deep...
Opening up about something I pushed down...
Opening up about something I ignored for years...
So I can't do it.
Had to think of my sister wanted to write it out
Chloe Apr 1
I saw the one I want
but half was missing
I remember the sleeping bag
in the back seat
for when we were
more than kissing
The hopeful hammer
and the threat of poison
I couldn’t feel it
at the time
I was frozen

******* in a tent
like the zipper was broken
Hand over my mouth
so it couldn’t open
A field full of muscle
I couldn’t confide in
driving souped up fortunes
I was afraid to ride in
Just give him what he wants
next time and he won’t hurt you
I couldn’t feel it
at the time
I didn’t have what I needed
to complete
my competing thoughts

Two names I love
in separate headlines
I knew then
I couldn’t leave
without breaking something
I knew what I wanted
but she was missing
and they were both gone
I couldn’t feel it
at the time
I couldn’t hear
a single thought

A decades long
drive-by memory
frozen in time
Now I can feel it all
What draws me in, to this?

Is it love, or something twisted—
Said a mother to her daughter
It's so hard to tell the difference

                            But please;
                                     I need to know the difference

"
I didn't understand then
And I won't pretend to know much more now;
All I can do is try to not be angry
                          
                            And at that, I'll fail.
                                                           ­        But I'll learn

"
I used to believe in the world, with an innocent infatuation for its goodness

Now I believe, with a knowing compassion for its faults

...

I think things that are perfect are easy to love;

         We meet God in our love for that which is not
from my poetry book, 📖 Biting Thorns Off Roses
Izan Almira Mar 31
A fly lazily perched on my computer,
it brushed its legs against each other.
Like you used to.

I stared at its black eyes,
dark like your gaze when you gripped me by hand
and pulled me away into your bedroom.

I remember how dark the world seemed
when I shut my eyes,
counting every second.
Hoping that it’d make it fade,
make it stop,
make it less real.

But the fly’s legs were thin, fragile, small,
tiny the same way I felt powerless
when you were around.

And then the fly flew away.
It swept through the window, free.
Oblivious to my catching breath,
while I hyperventilated
trapped between the memories
of what you have already forgotten.
I'm not native so I'm sorry if there are any mistakes on the poem, I hope they're not too anoying and you can enjoy it regardless.
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