The bestest
stress test.

The leaves fall down,
My motivation too.
Just yearning for winter
Or something else to do.

I cling on, push myself
With each and every task.
I'm barely hanging on,
It's too much to ask.

To the branches and twigs,
The leaves remain strong.
Stacks form beneath them;
They will all join the song.

Yet as the leaves fall,
I can see a clearing.
My vision is regained;
My ears are hearing.

There's beauty around;
The foliage is red.
It merely suggests change;
The trees aren't dead.

Instead of wilting
Just like the flowers,
I can enjoy the minutes
And be present in the hours.

Floral death lies amongst
The pumpkins that grow;
When the days are long,
It's okay to take it slow.

The children find joy
In trick-or-treat.
There's maple, pumpkin,
And apple to eat.

In autumn you may
Lose your spark,
Just as the maples
Expose their bark.

There's also the chance
To ******* your boots.
Stay grounded like the oaks
Who find strength in roots.

I just want to play my music loud
Enough to blow my ******* brains out
There's so much happening all at once
The overstimulation makes me want to run
My system is overwhelmed by love and joy
But that's only one side of the coin
On the flip side, anxiety is everything
So much it feels like I am drowning

Sleepless nights
Lost in a million thoughts
Everything is jumbled up
Eyebags always present
Pressure pulling me under

Not noticing the passing hours
Endless daydreams rewind
Even those lost in time
Dreading the morning to come
Escape to another land
Drifting off now...

Imagine a treadmill
for your brain.
That never stops
speeding up.
Slowly, at first,
you savor each step.
But boredom pushes you
faster and faster.
No longer tasting.
Only inhaling
the adrenaline.
Because unless you find the next page,
the next post,
the next video,
you risk facing
the combined gravity
of reality
converging upon a single point
of agony.
And so you scroll.
To keep stress away,
the roaring anxiety at bay.

Terror evolves in the pure open space
where sparked by the doubt of one who resents
the consequence of living and knowing
nothing of the terrible, terrible
confrontation, it propounds incessant
problems of being and ceasing until
entangled Reason entangles itself
in implications of implications,

confounding the space, conceiving a place
of refuge bounding Nowhere’s edge,
where ponderous dreams of life without care
augment the power and anger and dread
of Terror itself, thickening like air,
glutting the infinite heart of the head.