I think I need to wash my soul
All the water I drink every day
makes no difference
I’m not sure if I’m writing poetry or music
I guess it doesn’t matter
Right now I just need to let it out
I read the other day that it takes maturity to be happy
So please
don’t give me happiness
give me maturity
Because I don’t know how to be happy
I’m still a child
I need to grow

The part I am missing…
But why does it feel missing?
Am I not already whole?
Then what do I lack?
For I search for what is already within me
Long imprisoned
in the claws of the Devil
desperate to break free
But what will become of me with it?
Wasn’t this the missing part?
If it was already in me
it was never missing
It was already
in its rightful place
I just needed to find it

It took me a while to understand
that life happens in active mode
not passive
Everything is beautiful
in my mind
But lying in bed
or sitting on the couch
won’t bring that beauty
into my life

I was crying in your arms
Then I lifted my head and looked at you
You blinked at me, not knowing what to do
And right then I knew
The journey to finding myself
would be mine
alone

You know,
I wish you truly understood
I chose you to save me.
I married you.

Come on,
be my Prince Charming,
be the hero who pulls me out of this hole.

But the more I look at your life,
the more I see you moving forward
and me falling behind.

This isn’t how I pictured it.
I thought you’d be by my side.