I can save myself.
'salva te ipsa' marks my arm, a reclamation, declaration, that this body is mine!

I can love myself.
I can love myself so feircly that not even a thunderstorm dare rain on me.

I can fix my own ******* crown.
For it was my war-torn haands that placed it upon my head.

I was having a conversation
With a friend
And she said
She hides her feelings
Around school
Around her family
Around her friends
And sometimes
From herself
I do the same thing
And that day
I realized
Us people that do that
We are usually the
People who
Help others
When others are down
Because that
That usually helps ourselves
But when people try to help us
What do we do?
We push them away
Because we don't like being the ones
Who need the help
Because to us
In our mind
That is admitting defeat
But in real life
It's actually us starting
To win
To win the battle
To win against the harsh feelings
And the harsh words
Our mind has gone to deal with
And through this though
I learned
Before you save someone else
Save yourself first.
Because YOU
Are what influence your feelings
About yourself
So when you save yourself
You are killing your
Thoughts that run through you
The thoughts that hurt you the most
People give up
Because to do this is such a long process
But you will get through it
I know you can.

At the end of the day, all we have is who we are and what we have become. So, be your own hero because darling, in this cruel world, nobody can really understand you or stay with you. We only have  ourselves till the end of our existence, others are mere spectators of our life who renders our existence a bit more easy or difficult as the situation requires.

You’re your very own hero,
shining the ray of hope in your dark corner,
standing up for yourself,
even when you hear yourself stutter and falter.
You do your very own thing,
comfortable and beautiful in your own skin,
you’re that one true best friend you’ll ever have,
who will literally be there through thick and thin.

Not all heroes wear capes,
they’re normal humans who strongly live on.
Not all heroes fly through cities,
they walk ahead, all alone, even when everyone is gone.
Not all heroes save people,
some save themselves when they think
that they have nothing more.
Not all heroes want a ‘great future’,
they just endeavor to live life better than before.

So be your own hero,
look into the mirror and give it a wink,
love that hero looking back at you,
let that hero live every day, life goes by in a blink.

its so much more heroic to say, i saved myself. but the truth is,
oh yes the toxic truth,
here it comes,
steady your morals!
he saved me, i was burnt to a crisp..
and he took my ashes and smeared them over his heart.

Now i can feel the life in me drumming its way through my blood once again.
I wish i could say i stood on my own two feet, but i have not
i am proud of him, for saving me.
If not me,
it will be
he,
why should i be ashamed of that?

Of course, it would have been heroic if i had done it,
but i was never one to be
'the hero'
anyways.

Much like being trapped in an elevator,
Awaiting your rescue,
Wondering if you should be the one to save yourself,
But you start panicking once the doors wont open,
You feel yourself shrinking,
Drowning in your thoughts,
Internally collapsing from the stress,
You begin to hyperventilate,
But not audibly, no, it's completely silent,
The utter silence itself is deafening,
You question the stability and structure
Of the suspended room that your life is being held in,
Back to the silence, was that a creaking sound
Or are you just starting to become paranoid now,
Is someone on the outside trying to pry the doors open
To help rescue you, and get you out,
Or is someone simply mindlessly hitting the elevator button
Waiting for it to come, though it never will,
Surely they'll become annoyed and just take the stairs,
But how are you supposed to get out of this situation,
This state of complete panic, you start to sob,
And that's when you realize that this is what anxiety feels like.