At first, I was a tree —a blade of grass...—a cloud....
My eye saw and my skin felt — I did breath in the butterfly
So close to Nature–as–God was I that...
Romanced her she did to me

Then, with a rending that tore all asunder,
Iron AND
Steel AND
Coal AND
THUNDER of...

Machines pounding pounding pounding and...
Ripping and ripping and ripping
With a mighty roaring of engines came

The Victorian Era bound up in all its pain.

Maps of dread!
Pathways open ready to navigate,
crossways sweeping to a loss.
Should I resist the current,
turn escapist to the fluid?
Or should I see where it takes me,
what cascades ought to be seen up close?

So I chose to be swept.
Left or right? Left? Or right?
Waves! Waves and waves, they haste,
they lead me where I couldn't choose
which route to take.
I can no longer go backwards in my decision;
Im Lost! In this place, this very dark place...

I can no longer see:
thus my other senses I'll use to see—
and guide me throughout the dark...
the route I take will be seen by my taste.

I wander in the depths of where I ended,
feeling with my touch, and my steps paced,
attempting to grip a rocky wall:
I almost fall to a hard solid ground,
feeling scared and too cold as to freeze
away, maybe even break apart and lose myself,
ever changing to the cold and the dread.

My grip falters, yet panic does not arrive
because I knew since the start of my wander:
I am no one without my sight and knowledge/
so I lay down, awaiting death,
as no places I've tread reflect or predict myself
alone and with nothing to survive.

As a final goodbye, I lick my killer:
this salty— silted shore;
My final taste of this world:
it tastes so murky and gloomy,
yet as time goes on...

I love this sadness, how it engulfs
me in the end, encompassing my farewell;
now clarity enlightens me.
I remember not appreciating my loyal companion,
and never again if I only had the chance!
I'd reconcile with you, my lovely, neglected companion.

delphinium migrant blue,
and into night
we follow,
toward the residue
of morning,
where there's no time
limit to grief.

you wake with
electric intervals,
something's wrong
with yesterday,
in your head are
galaxies like grains of salt,
and they fill up the sky.

these red metallic balloons,
that come to you
when you are ripped open,
whether it’s by pain
and heartache
or you’re falling in love,
these you can’t close
yourself off to.

but what you actually want
is to bypass them,
and try to reach that
dawn serenade,
which is floating
above them,
as if golden electric ribbons
which don’t
demand repayment.

My eyes sink
Dreaming of you
If I blink
I may miss you more

It’s your soul
I hold so close
And your love
Raise a toast

My eyes are like sunset
Sinking while I sleep
Yours are like sunrise
Full of energy

My light dims
While yours awakens
My might sins
Your sins were taken

We’re so up-and-down
I’m full of frowns
Your smile lightens
Mine turns around

You brighten my evenings
You heal my grieving
I have a lot of skeletons
They hold meanings

I’ll never be like you
You’re perfect by define
I’ll live in solitude
You’ll never live as mine

The way I’d design it
You’ll make my coffee daily
But I’ll resign it
And give up on the maybe

Your face will exit my brain
Two weeks notice, I’ll never be the same
I’ll hold my head and pray
That my world won’t turn as grey

As it was without you.

When she's serious, she's cool and bright,
Like moonlight sharp in the quiet night.
Each word she speaks is calm and wise,
A thoughtful spark behind her eyes.
But when she smiles, a child appears,
She speaks with joy that lifts my gloom,
And fills my heart with quiet bloom.

Hopeless Romanticism - is what ails me
this ever longing for a connection with another soul.
The festering desire to be loved, understood
I fear as a society we are lost
never able to tolerate the company of others —
too busy curating ones own life in a realm that is not tangible
in the act of curation we eliminate any chance
in experiencing vulnerability with another
the painting of a perfect relationship
lacks the connection we desire so much.
We remain at surface level with one another
no longer interested in digging deeper.

If only I could hate you, just a bit -
the lonely nights would hurt less;
It's always late when memories hit,
no trace of light in the darkness.
.
There won't be another love like this,
rare as diamonds in the ground;
I wish to join the abyss,
hide where I'll never be found.
.
Our broken edges used to fit
together like a hand and glove,
and I doubt I'll ever find it,
another gift from above.
.
No one else before or after,
has come close to what you were;
Silver bells of your laughter,
Pierce my heart still, like a burr.
.
You're gone, you've moved on,
living life as if we never were;
I'm on my own, a wounded fawn,
days merging in a blur.
.
I want to hate you, I swear,
you haunt me against my will,
yet foolishly, I still care;
a dark void nothing can fill.
.
I fall and fall, ever deeper,
crawl to try and escape,
you are my own Reaper,
eternal shadow in your shape.