I had a feeling it'd come to this,
Yet I didn't want to accept such fate
Though I'm still confused,
As to what the **** I even did
Laughing and joking with all perfectly fine
A week of absence
Then suddenly years of memories thrown out the ******* window

Tell me,
Did I mean so little this whole time?

Nevertheless I laugh,
For I believe and trust you'll respect what has happened in our lives together
Realizing we shouldn't part ways;
Likewise that the first fight your boyfriend and you get into,
Will bring you strolling on back
Or even if your boyfriend and you break-up,
Shall do the same

Until then,
I mind to wait...



10/29/19

I don't understand why you decided
That leaving was better than staying;
Or why you think
That you don't need me anymore
But its fine dear,
I can only hope this is temporary as usual
And so when you come back,
I'll foolishly accept it
And try to pretend and hide the reality


10/28/19

I really don’t have much time left
really want to spend all my time with you again.

It’s been a year
I’m missing you so badly each day passes
Yes we’ve chat, we catch up a few times.
But the bond isn’t the same as last time
Because you probably move on already

I love you so much, I’m sorry to say it now
Because when you want hear it so badly I couldn’t say it out. Time will tell. And time really tell, how can I love you when it’s been a year?

Don’t made me a fool
because of you I look a ******* fool
I put so much efforts just to get close to you again.


‘seen’

you are seating far beyond
but i want to sit beside you
are we thinking the same
are we feeling the flame
we tend to tame
around others
we choose the same flavors
we eat the same that we favor
but i know when you lose
when you choose
you with me
with us
it is different
you are what i like to be
you are what i like to see
we escape on some nights
we crave for weeks
are you happy to see me
are you delighted to
remember everything
we used to be
i am not sure how it will be
definitely
another fantasy

xoxo

some are thin
some are thick
some are sad
some are rad
some are about them
some about you
but mostly all about you
mostly about us
mostly about
the times we book
the times we hook
the times we click
the times we flick
i am not your chick
but why do i stick
to the feeling of warmth
even though i know it is all harm
will i justify your sight
will i see you fight
for this love
crying from above
i wanna get out
but i miss those mouth
i miss those smiles
those eyes
i miss those laugh
those hugs
i miss you
love

xoxo

i am sure you are tense
i can feel it
should i say
you have my heart
that is why i know
what you are feeling
i just wish
your heart is with mine
coz i could assume
but never consume
this feelings
this being
we were once in those state
why can't it go back this late
hey mate
can you be my playmate
is this a date
let's call it
a night

xoxo

Sun scorching, sweltering, sizzling beach

My hardened soles resist the heat

Sunglasses shielding my eyes

White cotton ball clouds glide

Along deep blue skies

But I’m blue too

Intensely

Missing

You

im over it.
please stop haunting my mind.

when im happy.
when im sad.
when im angry.
when im feeling.

please stop.
when im trying to sleep
after a long day, week, month.

you appear yet arent here.
so please go away.
and stay away.

- i miss you and i hate it

No word tonight,
Yet another day,
I will miss,
And reminisce,
Of what could have been,

No word this morning,
Yet another day,
Of longing,
Of hoping to hear,
From you sweet words,

No word this evening,
Another day passed,
Of silence,
Sinking through me,
Envelop-ing the day,

No word from you,
Now past midnight,
Thoughts of you,
Of you, of you, of you,
I only think of you,

I’m drowning,
Trying to catch,
And slow my breaths,
So that I may sleep,
And forget all of you,

No word at all,
Nothing,
It’s gone,
It’s over,
Now I know,
Of we, that never was.