Up at the top of the acre
where the overflow stand-
pipe comes up
out of the grass,
there's so much running
water that reeds and rushes
have taken over
and choked up the land

In the evening
looking up to the window
as I wash
I see a family of roe deer, down
from the woods
in among the reeds

In the morning
they're still grazing there
quietly
as if nothing’s

changed

Can’t feel my hands
Or feet
Or anything

I don’t know if I’m stepping or not
My skin is as white as the snow
My body is shaking unwillingly

The cold wore off long ago
Just to be replaced by numbness
I feel as if my heart is freezing

Can’t walk anymore
Falling to my knees (if they are even there)
And I start to freeze more

Suddenly, warmth came
I wasn’t trapped in a frozen cage
The cold got lost;

But I lost something more

Vivid Blue Clear Skies
Clouds filling
Young eyes
Smooth hard rock
Every step is a knock
For adventure

Cloudy Grey Skies
Clouds Filling
Matured Eyes
Scratchy pavement beneath the feet
Battered beneath searing heat
Hints of old times

Clear quiet Empty skies
Clouds filling
Ancient eyes
Soft grass crunching
Alone peaceful
Closing eyes...

Golden Lovely Cloud filled skies
Clouds Filling
Reborn eyes
Soft ground
Love all around
Eyes Cast down

i wish you could’ve seen it
the way we love in my dreams-
we were moving
cohesively pulsating
like the cells that course
throughout our veins
and keep us breathing
and alive.

i wish you understood that.
i wish you would have asked me
before leaving that night.

Listening to a song you heard a million times before,
in a past not distant from your present,
but finding a spiritual connection with the lyrics,
the instruments, the singer's voice--
you find newfound meaning.

Then you realise, it is not the song,
which has changed,
but you.

This,..  My way,  my nature
Birthed to this,
My lineage,  this legacy,
Given,..  Named,..  
Long ago,  our lines given
Titles, trades,  qualities,  dispositions
Earned, bestowed, deserved,  taken
It was a day of beginnings,  
A day of firsts, lines created
It was a day of words
It says the day of naming.
Only are names given but that once
After that day,  one is born into
The name,  the legacy then passed
From generation to the next,
fathers and sons
My line: Fehlmann...
A man missing, or lost and searching?
Hiding?  Different?  A little off?  
Perhaps indefinable?  
Unreachable, exploring,  so misleading,
Misunderstood,  built different,  special
Untouchable, wandering,  leading?  
I can't help but wonder,  why?  Those words?
Was my distant relative present?
What a puzzling choice of words to be given?  Or,  earned?