Wore down the nerves
To write down a billet dou
Magical lines she deserves
To this manicured angel
Never have I seen a match
Resembling this fairy bird

Shy and rising Sun
Let me bring you my world
Onto your arms
Place it on your soft petals
Embrace your scent
All the way I've tried was in vain
I'm so ready for you to share pain

The pages of your letters,

Coloured and scented,

Are the flowers of my day.


From my fingers they drop,

Like dry petals in the breeze,

When sleep drifts over me

And thoughts of you become my dreams.

i want to write you the perfect poem
i want to string words together so spectacularly that you tattoo them on the inside of your eyelids
i want to write you the world, wrap these lines in a bow and leave the package on your doorstep
i want to write you the perfect poem,
but i'm an imperfect person and love,
so are you

you are the bags under my eyes
i carry you with me wherever i go
and you draw the most attention to the brightest parts of me
my under eye bags are the only cosmetics i wear daily;
you are the result of late nights of laughter and 1 AM drives home

you sopped up the spilled cherry coke in the back of my car with napkins from my glove box
i braked too hard and it spilled all over your feet
it was a quiet ride home
my knuckles were white on the steering wheel and my head a blur of apology
my favorite mop;
my messes are yours and yours will be mine and i've never been one for tidiness but i'd scrub the world clean for your smile

you are
the dent in my passenger side door,
the soreness in my muscles,
the paint stains in all of my jeans;
i can’t get rid of it, i’ll never get rid of it;
the dent gives my car character
the soreness makes my body feel real
the stains make me feel free and the jeans fit me like a glove

i like routine and you are a part of mine
text you tease you love you
wash rinse repeat

i could send you a thousand love letters
i’ll keep them in a shoebox instead

i'll write your name into the stars,
i'll carve my love for you in the moon,
print it on postcards,
press it into my skin
but i cannot write you the perfect poem

Dearest:

If I could touch you just once, then I'd be whole, I swear.
Sitting here letting youtube shuffle like the muddled thoughts within my mind, you're all that won't dissipate into thin air.
All Time Low, then church tomorrow morning, why won't you leave?
Are you lonely?
Do you need someplace to stay for a while?
Well, my arms and ears are open. Stay here a while.
Rest.
Everyone says "shes an invalid" and "she needs help", but I know it's not true.
Because if she feels half what I feel, all she needs is me.
And I need her more than the breaths I take, the words I write, and the ideas I spout.
One day, we'll be together again, angel, angel, angel. My angel.
My one and only angel.
And I can't wait for the day I can roll over in this same bed where we kissed and see your sleeping eyelashes fluttering admist your sleeping sighs.
I won't be doing much sleeping.
I promise.

I fell in love with you
Oh have I ever got stumbled this bad
You had and still have the key to my fortress
I am so afraid to change the lock
Cause you might wanna come home
Or thought that the sun burns too hot outside
Or maybe because I simply want you to come back
I want you
Only you
That one particular man;
Who pushed my walls with your tenderness
Quietly holding my heart without touching my skin
Whom I choose to let in and now
—I cannot let go
When you decided you hated every pictures I put up on my wall of history
—I cannot hate you
Even after you walked over the crown I'm wearing
And what's worst is, you spit on my face, yet I still wake up every day—choose to fall in love with you even more
I wish I could stop
I wish I could fast forward the time
To that moment when your name won't feel like a blade coming out of my throat
Or when I can rest at night without recalling how you always, always told me to be in my most comfortable position inside your hug before we sleep
I said I was done
Done for what? I'm walking away from you but keep finding myself going round and round you as my heart calling your name like echoes
We do know there are two sides of every story as they said
You hurt me, I hurt you
How we both think we got bruised a little more than another
Was it true? Does it even matter anymore who hurts who when we both are hurting?
Doesn't pain is in accordance with love?
We got hurt cause we love
We love
You loved me
And I loved you
I loved you then
I love you still
This is too much. Falling in love at this age is too much for me to handle cause my brain already picture how forever looks like when my last name changed into yours
I was off guard when you stood there in front of me. You were never on my plan. I surely didn't know I am able to love like this again. To experience this kind of love;
The kind that makes me think of nothing as long as it's you. The love I avoid to have cause I'm always scared of losing. The love that makes me laugh and cry in one single line you speak. The 'I just want to be a koala and you're the tree' kind of love. The love that makes me willing to do crazy **** above my pride cause you’re so much more worth it. The love that changed my insides like someone just explode a grenade in it. The love that makes me see the poetry written all over your tattooed skin as I voice them out through my writing. The love I love deeper than love have allowed to love. I found in you
And I lost it
When I lost you.

My heart was like a mail box.
Waiting for one piece of mail in particular.
A special letter hand delivered.
The promise of sealed flap, carefully stamped addressed perfectly.
Scented in heavy anticipation.
There I stood in different variation of weather.
Going from hot to cold, the thought alone keeping me warm, closed in.
Suppressing everything that I held in.
The flutter of ads, bills, and different envelopes addressed to other P.O boxes helped build this anticipation.
Waiting for the moment I could open my mouth and accept you for everything you are.
Pouring your heart out in full stationary fashion.
Without hands to satisfy such anticipation.
To open such a flap and grant myself the gift of you kind of puts us in awkward disposition.
But the urgency of it all is as clear as day

I feel much heavier these days
I sleep a lot, and I paint with browns
Light ochre and soft greys
You tell me that's what you've noticed, anyway.
I forget to do my nails, and leave my hair up
Let it grow out and longer than it suits me.
Sometimes you tell me things have changed and tightly hold my hands -
I laugh and pretend I don't understand.
I used to read a lot, read to you -
Anything I found, poetry and song lyrics
And books I'd bought, or old ones that i'd suddenly see anew
when I'm seeing you,
over the top of the pages
Sitting opposite me crossed legged
Mimicking my voice
Laughing till we're both lightheaded.
Years ago you used to replace the flowers in my bedroom every morning
I told you to stop and that lilies were getting boring.
Today I got up extra early and painted my nails fuschia-pink
And cut big handfuls of daisies for the vase above the kitchen sink
When you came down from bed I looked at you over the pages of my book and said
"Remember this?