Daddy never called her princess.
Never did he pick her up to place upon his shoulder.
Once in a blue moon.
He picked up a check.
He did not like cake.
Or blowing out candles.
That he made clear.
Little girl longed for loving arms.
She found them in lover after lover.
She needed to be loved.
She always loved too much or too little.
Lovers lips made her feel less alone.
She ****** strangers so the bed wouldn’t lay cold.
So maybe one day someone can finally stay.
I'm crazy afraid of this valentines day
I try to improve
I try to modulate
I try to flirt
I try to cross the friend zone
I try to romance
your single gaze makes me blank.
because I cant lose you forever ..
It's exactly 12 AM.
Avoiding you again.
Back to old habits.
Pushing you away when I can't do anything anymore.
When all I feel is guilt.
I try not to do it, but it's so easy to be tempted into doing old habits.
Especially the worst ones.
Sorry for all the trouble I've caused you.
You deserve better just like the rest of the ones I've pushed away.
You gave so much for me
Cared so much for me.
Guided me when I couldn't see
Taught me about Jesus and what to believe.
You dried my eyes at night when I cried.
Took up for me when I was too scared to fight
You gave me everything when we didn't have a dime.
No matter what, you managed to provide
You always managed to smile
Despite all the darkness in your life.
You made sure that we were always fed and had a bed to lay our heads at night.
I understand now how hard that was for you.
Now that I'm older I can see all the Hell you went through
But all the struggles you overcame, they strengthened you.
Because of this, Mom, I respect you.
Because of this, Mom, I love you.
Whatever troubles life has in store for me
What ever Hell I have to face
I'll take a second to think of you
I know I will make it through anything Mom...
If I'm anything like you.
Looking from afar and wishing to be close.
Having him in your arms and just letting go.
Knowing him but not having a chance. Missing his contagious laugh and our dance.
Seeing him and its breaking your heart knowing you'll never be able to remind him of all the memories, sitting on the bed late talks at night, cuddling at his side in fear of the night, him saying you are mine and I am yours. But now he doesn't remember, all the memories these frames hold, that I hold dear. O darling I wish you were here.
— The End —