i'm just a small boy staring at a dead tree in the rain
looking up
wondering why love won't grow

I spoke to you in poetry &
Left real words unsaid
My art was fiction &
Heart was true

What was it worth?

You never read them &
I never sent them to you
I just said I loved you &
Left it at that

Gah
There is a stick in my throat
Emotions I cannot *****
Slice my chest open
Pull them out
Untangle it all
OCD has its uses
But
I get stuck
So I leave them out
To air dry
To suffocate slowly
Til I feel nothing
Gah

Maybe I miss the late nights of flesh interwoven
sheets cast aside and candlelit silhouettes
Baby I miss the peace found between kisses
placed on the nape of your neck
Crazy that this blue flame misses your
Red fire and riding rhythm
Vainly I miss watching those hips walk away
But it's a sight I'll never trade

Well most days I'm fine
But today I'm not
Mind is trapped inside
Feelings sliced paper thin
Just to fit in
All the cardboard boxes
Neatly labeled but all blank
Words are meaningless
Words have no reason to hide
So I hide
I write it all out
Cuz I won't go outside
The darkness doesn't like the light
And today I feel dark
Haunted
Most days I'm fine
But today I'm not

Distant
Slow shadows
Growing grey
On the inside
Washed out
Flavorless
Fallen
Feelings I hold
Write it out
On the walls
Missing piece
Anxiety
Nobody gets this
But me

It's dreams that keep me going
Dreams that keep me awake
Trying to capture that moment
That feeling stuck in my ribs
Love is not supposed to be caged
Is it?
Unless the love is unwanted
Boundaries
Just to be on the safe side
Alone
Just to feel safe in pride
I always know better
And walk my talk
Spare some change for an old feller
Who didn't win in the end
Fought the good fight
Only to learn fighting isn't good
Tragic // comic
Pushed too far over the edge
Forced ink on ragged paper
To say a million reasons
Not to fall in love
She's one in a million reasons
To fall again