So many regrets from just 19 years,
So many things that have given me fears.
So many problems at the end of the day,
And when the time for help comes
I don't got **** to say.
Lot of ****** in my place would've ******* left,
But I had to prove that I was the best of the best.
Shouldn't of given up the red apple, for the berry,
Now I feel broken, starving and scary.
I see myself and think,
"Do I look happy? What's been lost?
If I end it all, what would be the cost?"
Baby on the way, and I don't know how to think.
Every time I think of it my heart ******* sink.
I don't know if I'm gonna make it through,
Honestly lately I've been feeling blue.
Depressions beating me with a stick,
And it's a catastraphe.
A tragedy, really.
Cuz at the end of the day, when the light goes out,
The regrets charge in on horses, dismount,
They stab my heart, head and soul without
Any sign of remorse.
I ride through life on a crippled horse,
Head up like a hero,
But minds turning to ground zero,
Because I can't feel no
Emotions or thoughts but what I've lost.
I wonder what she'd do if she knew how I felt,
But I'm too scared to find out so I'm tying the belt,
Round my throat.
Try to breathe and gulp down the acidic air.
This isn't fair,
It's like fighting a bear with a pair of mittens,
A twig, a boot and a pear.
I can't bring myself to say I hate this kid,
But I hate my life, what I will do,
And what I did.
I don't love her as much as I used to,
Hopefully the baby will bring a boost, too.
Feeling like a *****,
Trapped in a cage,
Forced to wear beige to blend in.
Don't talk back or question,
Because she'll cry,
So lay down and rest in your sorrows.
Try to keep in mind that any day you could die.
Been struggling with my own personal demons as my relationship, new job, and baby.
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