What if all the colors we see are wrong?
What if there is not a difference in skin color or a rainbow?
What if our brain makes up what we see so the world will seem less dull?
What if God is a scientist and our universe is simply an experiment?
What if the air we breath is like water and when people go missing it's because a greater being went fishing and the people who were abducted were just caught and sent back?
What if our lives are just an illusion and we're somewhere in a test tube?
What if extras in movies cause everything that happens in the main character's life?
What if we all die tomorrow?
What if we all live tomorrow?

If only life was bliss
If only I kept your kiss
If only life did not change
If only it wasn't so strange
If only you were still here
to you, I felt so near.
If only I wasn't so down
How can I change this frown?
If only we kept our words
If only we could fly like the birds

If only it weren't so lonely
I'd be by your side
Our two hearts would collide
If only you were here
Everything would feel so clear

All these silly indecisive decisions
Weigh on this troubled mind
Always seems to be complicated situations
Processing through this conscious conscience
Can't seem to digest all this information
Straight from the page to my brain
All I feel is disconnection
From this interjected rejection
Gotta break free of this intersection
Give me the will to pick the right direction

If only I had your touch
If only everyone loved so much
If only I could hear
If only I felt no fear
If only you felt me there
If only love was in the air
If only friends pulled through
If only I put my arms around you

If only it weren't so lonely
I'd be by your side
Our two hearts would collide
If only you were here
Everything would feel so clear

All these silly indecisive decisions
Weigh on this troubled mind
Always seems to be complicated situations
Processing through this conscious conscience
Can't seem to digest all this information
Straight from the page to my brain
All I feel is disconnection
From this interjected rejection
Gotta break free of this intersection
Give me the will to pick the right direction

If only I felt alive
If only I could find the drive
If only you had my heart
If only we weren't so far apart
If only we took a glance
If only we took a chance
If only we were all we could be
If only I didn't give you my soul
Then I wouldn't be stuck in this dark hole
IF only I didn't miss
If only you never gave me your kiss
If only it was so real
if only you turned the wheel
If only...
If only it weren't so lonely
I'd be by your side
Our two hearts would collide
If only you were here
Everything would feel so clear

All these silly indecisive decisions
Weigh on this troubled mind
Always seems to be complicated situations
Processing through this conscious conscience
Can't seem to digest all this information
Straight from the page to my brain
All I feel is disconnection
From this interjected rejection
Gotta break free of this intersection
Give me the will to pick the right direction

©2017 Written By Benji James

If just for once our lips touch,
it would be a Hiroshima bomb dropped in my heart
—a sweet Lilac in my throat, and a jar of fireflies in my eyes.
As if the crevices of your lips are like windows to my sweet dreams,
a good night I godly won’t stop.

If just for once our hands hold,
it would be an ocean of poetry lines written in songs,
a moment of zero gravity where Venus lands on my palms.
Like a scent of fresh-plucked Lilies crawl back in my neck
—a familiar feeling of first breathing.

If just for once I can tell I love you,
we’ve been folded in cold sheets at still nights,
And I won’t be having dreams for long.
For it’s an oath I’d like to repeat for a life,
Four words to hoping you stay.

If just for once, it can be forevermore.

he said.

But please - if this is true - PLEASE tell me
WHY:

Do I hear your gentle hum in place of cricket melodies on warm nights that smell like summer?

I can feel your unspoken doubts and worries carve away at MY bones.

Does your face lights up when you see me, as if to say "Darling, I'm so glad I'm home!" Your gray sweater smells like that too.

I can't find a way to say goodbye to you. It isn't in my vocabulary. OUR words only know presence and adoration.


If your soul wasn't made for mine, who is going to hold your heart among the stars when the Earth is shattering beneath you.
I'm sure you could find someone else to,
But I know you'll be buried under ashes and rubble before you get around to it.

If your soul wasn't made for mine...
why did it tell me it was?

If not for the feelings, just for the fun
Stay with me for another day and
I’ll pin the sun in the sky

If not as a guest, just as a prisoner
Let me into your heart and
I’ll serve a sentence for life

If not for yourself, just for the heck
Make a wish, no matter what and
I’ll trade it with my soul for you

If not for real, just for pretend
Say I’m the one for you and
I’ll dwell in that alternate reality

If not for a lifetime, just for a day
Love me like there’s no tomorrow and
I’ll happily die in your arms tonight

A heart torn from yours
               I bled.
               Lost
               And lonely
               Soft whimpers
               I cry
                              “If only”
                              “If only”

Alone with my thoughts
               Buried sins
               Too unholy
               My mind
               In decay
                              If only
                              If only

Drunk off of your skin
               You took my soul
               Slowly
               Leaving me
               Hollow
                              If only
                              If only

Locked in self abuse
               I follow
               Too closely
               My own type
               Of torture
                              If only
                              If only

Gone with the wind
               You left me there
               Coldly
               Naked
               And numb
                              If only
                              If only

My blood on your hands
               I died.
               Lost
               And lonely
               I won't
               Say it again
                             "If only"
                              "..."

if I gave you a penny
              could I catch a kiss.

if I gave you a smile
             could I catch your lips.

If I gave you my breath
             could you hear my words.

If I gave you my heart
             could you hear its love.

If I gave you everything of me
             could you give it back..

If is to short a word to use,
          could you just look at me
saying the words *"I love you,